Want employees who care greatly about creating remarkable results? Listen to this interview! Lee Cockerell is one of the most down-to-earth and transparent leaders I’ve been privileged to interview. Far beyond management and leadership, Lee got to the heart of what’s needed to provoke greatness in yourself and your team.

 

Enjoy!

 

Resources from the interview:

7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Zero to One

 

Learn more about Lee Cockerell’s speaking and online courses here.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

“Why don’t they put more time and attention to that client? If they don’t, they might lose them.”

 

“Can’t they see I would be excellent in that position? Why don’t they consider me?”

 

“Don’t they understand that if they’d just have more team building activities throughout the year everyone would work better together? Collaboration clearly improved after our yearly retreat.”

 

“Why don’t they spend a little extra money on the furniture in our waiting area? At least they could provide fresh tea/coffee and relaxing (or energizing) music for guests! Seriously, don’t they understand that we’ll have a better reputation, and therefore more customers, if we did?”

 

Ever find yourself saying or thinking any of the above statements?

 

They, of course, are the responsible ones—the Owner, CEO, Executive in charge. And if they’d simply listen to you, then everyone would be better off, including them.

 

This is the way many of us think when faced with subpar performance, communities, election results, and even our workplaces. We see and hear a clear problem, even life-threatening, and chose to pass the buck, saying, “It’s not my responsibility.”

 

Those were almost the exact words Jackie said after I shared my concern about a slick spot on the pool deck where I narrowly avoided a serious injury. Concerned for others, I brought it to the attention of a long-term employee, Jackie, who casually said, “Yeah, we know about that spot.”

 

“You know that spot is there and you’re doing nothing to repair it?” I thought, loudly while desperately wanting to shake her and the entire leadership team.

 

Recognizing such an action (or even a complaint to the manager) would do no good, I’ve begun thinking about how I can help. Not because I have to—indeed, I’m a paying member—but because I love swimming there.

 

The idea of asking myself how I can help fix that slick spot was inspired by Dr. Marc Cesari, a chiropractor in Baltimore, Maryland. As the only employee in a new office space in Towson, Marc wanted the waiting area to be inviting, peaceful and filled with inspiration. Rather than wait for the Owner’s approval to outfit the waiting room, he bought the furniture, painted the walls and ensures cleanliness.

 

“Wait, what—you paid for this furniture out of your own pocket? It’s not your business—you’re his employee. Is he going to reimburse you at least?” I asked.

 

“Yes, I did pay for it, and without asking for permission to be reimbursed. If he can’t see the value of this furniture, then I’ll eat the cost to ensure I get to work in a space I’m proud of,” he responded almost as if everyone should behave in the same way.

 

Indeed, such thinking aids greatly in getting the results we want. In fact, it prompted me to send a message to the manager asking how I can help remedy the situation. Not that I know a thing about pool decks, but I’d certainly be happy to sand it down if that would help.

 

What do you find yourself irritated with or complaining about? What can you do today to be a part of the solution?  

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. Need more focus and energy in your work? Check out our brand new Gearing for Greatness package today.

 

Running beneath the surface of our conscious awareness is a set of beliefs—sort of an autopilot of assumptions and expectations. The role models we’re exposed to as children, along with the stories we consistently hear, instruct our belief system and set us up to repeat patterns that create the results we see every day.

Do you know the beliefs you bought into as a child that continue to create your current reality?

I thought I did, and then I came face-to-face with the reality of an undesirable result I’ve recreated too many times to count.

Frustrated and angry, I’ve found myself lamenting to friends and colleagues about how inappropriate some men have been, particularly in a business setting.

“The guy’s a jerk,” they’d say, fully supporting my irritation at the situation.

Which is true—some men are jerks, though none of them have the ability to impact me without my permission.

Rather than waste any more time pointing a finger outward, I looked inward and asked myself, “How am I behaving that’s causing such interactions? Why do they think it’s acceptable to speak or act in such a way toward me?”

Over the years, I’ve asked this question dozens of times and come to the realization it was something I said or did, giving the wrong impression. I sought to adjust my behaviors and set stronger boundaries after each instance, which ultimately never worked.

I was fighting inertia—a deep-rooted set of beliefs that were instructing my behaviors. As a result, I continually found new behaviors to elicit the same result and ended up increasingly frustrated.  

When I looked deeper, what I discovered was sobering and empowering at the same time.

Somewhere along my journey, I bought into the belief that I lacked inherent value as a person. For a whole variety of reasons, I never developed a healthy sense of self-worth.

Though, until this moment, I thought my confidence and esteem were quite strong!

Beneath the surface of my consciousness is a little voice that fears inadequacy, loss and rejection. It’s the little voice that grabs a hold of me and instructs me to use “proven” (learned) strategies to ensure I’m liked, valuable and worthwhile.

Said simply, that strategy was flirting.

I understand that the only way to shift this result is to get clear about two things: the value I bring and the challenges potential clients are facing.

Today, I don’t go into a meeting without having a conversation with myself about my own value, read some testimonials and plug into my own sense of worth. This clarity has given me the ability to focus on the business at hand and avoid the energy and time sink of such negative interactions.

Rather than being caught up in a game of trying to be liked, I’m finding enjoyment in uncovering real opportunities to help leaders who want more focus, energy and greater impact in the work they do. Now I have the time and energy to focus on helping the ones who want the value I bring to the table.

What results do you find yourself continually experiencing? What part do your beliefs play in these results?

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

 

Why do leaders struggle to create collaborative work environments where team members step up and do whatever it takes to create remarkable results?

Is it because they haven’t set a vision that is compelling enough? Maybe.

Is it because they haven’t counseled their team enough about the importance of working together, despite the weekly—no daily—reminders? Probably not.

Is it because the team hasn’t decided on a shared set of values? I doubt it.

The biggest reason leaders struggle to rally a team is less about what they’re doing and more about what they’re allowing.

While enjoying a delicious scoop of ice cream at my favorite shop in Baltimore, MD (The Charmery), I listened to Lauren, a recently minted lawyer, share about Waffle Wednesdays, a tradition she started at the small district court where she works.

“I love to bake,” she said, as she went into great deal about the pumpkin waffles she made in November, and then the stuffing waffles with cranberry sauce and gravy she made in December.

“What’s your address?” I asked, “I’m coming over for breakfast!”

A smile graced her face as she shared about how nice it is that the judge lets her bake the most exquisite breakfast for the entire team once a month. “He sits there with us for a full hour as we all get to have fun and enjoy non-work related conversations,” Lauren shared.

“Let you?” I thought, as I wondered how many leaders miss out on the cohesion that’s created from these kinds of joyful experiences.

They’re so busy preaching teamwork instead of allowing their team’s natural interests and passions to strengthen the kinds of connections that bolster results and benefit everyone.

Of course, it’s the connection that makes work easier and more enjoyable. It’s the connection that breeds compassion and encourages team members to pick up the slack when someone is struggling. It’s also the connection that encourages colleagues to challenge each other to dream bigger and act braver, netting better results for everyone involved.

As you begin thinking about how to get your team working more collaboratively throughout 2017, consider how to allow non-work related passions and interests to forge depth in connection.

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

Company culture experts urge leaders to establish clearly defined values to serve as a guide for decisions and behaviors throughout an organization. 

 

To ensure they have the best representation of the values shared among those in leadership, companies often spend gobs of cash and time on experts who ultimately produce a document aligning the most common ideals. 

 

Mounted on the wall, and often on the website, these key words or phrases are meant to ensure everyone is on the same page about what’s expected and acceptable.

 

While these values are typically inspiring and alluring, they often fail to produce the intended result—a strong team environment. In many cases, these key phrases wind up serving to weaken trust, accountability, collaboration and productivity.

 

Stopping into Best Buy to exchange a gift I received for store credit, I headed to the customer service line. Fortunately, the line was quick and I was walking toward the exit in less than 10 minutes.

 

As I made my way toward the exit, I noticed a security guard patting down the jacket of a guy leaving the store and found myself concerned—“Did that guy steel something? Are they worried he stole something? Are they going to pat down my jacket before I can leave the store?”

 

As I approached the exit discomfort took over and I wound up doing what I typically do in situations like this—say something ridiculous.

 

“Can I be next? Do I get this same level of attention?”

 

“No, no…” both of them responded, with a sincere discomfort that was palpable.

 

Moments later, the young man who was patted down caught up to me and I asked him, “What is that all about?”

 

“All employees have to be patted down before they can exit the store,” he said, and continued with, “Which is stupid because if I wanted to steel something I certainly wouldn’t put it in my jacket.”

 

“Why do they do that then?” I asked, seriously needing to understand why any company would come to the conclusion that such a practice was a good idea.

 

“I have no idea,” he said as he threw his jacket on and headed off, “but it’s stupid.”

 

Later, I looked up Best Buy’s core values—

 

• Unleash the Power of Our People
• Learn from Challenge and Change
• Show Respect, Humility, and Integrity
• Have Fun While Being the Best

 

—and found myself wondering:

 

• How does such a lack of trust allow the power of their people to be unleashed?
• Have they thought about identifying theft as a cultural challenge and enlisting employees to uncover the necessary change?
• Does this practice show respect, or encourage humility and integrity?
• Does the executive team think such a practice is fun for anyone involved, including customers? How is anyone supposed to be their best with such a significant lack of trust?

 

While getting on the same page regarding values is important, what’s more important is consistently asking, “How do we know we’re living our values?” And, especially for those in leadership, “Are my behaviors in alignment with our values? How do I know they are?”

 

The key indicator to discovering the truth behind each question is looking at employee behaviors, along with customer feedback. If they aren’t living the values, perhaps it’s because the leadership is confused about where the real values are born and die. 

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

The greatest teachers in life are rarely the ones with great advice. They are remarkable role models who consistently show the way, while asking the kind of questions that stop us in our tracks. Their questions infect us with the kind of curiosity that leads us in the direction of our own answers.

 

You know the kind of person I’m talking about. Their question pierces through our internal chatter and commands the truth we’ve been searching for.

 

In November of 2016, I witnessed a teacher so committed to his craft that he not only showed the way, but provoked questions in me in a way that has changed me forever.

 

On day two of a three-day business retreat, Mark LeBlanc dropped to his knees in front of fifteen highly ambitious business owners. With his hands clasped in prayer, he opted to forgo asking us to begin tracking specific business numbers every day, and he full out begged.

 

Mark is a remarkably successful businessman, speaker and business coach. He doesn’t need to beg anyone to buy from him. In fact, he gives away valuable content and turns away business until he sees a perfect fit, both energetically and practically.

 

Yet—he stood on that stage, dropped to his knees and sincerely begged us to take action immediately and consistently, citing specific success stories from those who followed his advice. But I’d heard many business coaches recite such facts, and make similar suggestions. So, what made Mark different?

 

He got down on his knees and begged us. Sincerely begged us. 

 

He wasn’t begging to get something from us. He was begging because he’s desperately committed to our long-term success. Of course, he also knows our success is his success.

 

His passion and commitment to learning and sharing was infectious and instructive. It conjured up in me a set of questions that has radically altered my focus for 2017.

 

Here are the top 5 Questions To Add Impact to Your Life in 2017:

 

1. What result is worthy of my begging?

 

What result do I believe so strongly in that I would literally drop to my knees with sincere commitment of creating? This question is worth sitting with for a few days, even weeks.

 

2. When I’m not concerned with money, status, achievement or survival, what do I most enjoy doing?

 

What nags at me, begs for my attention and feeds my curiosity in a way that I cannot seem to shake? (Special note: Some of us have ignored our curiosity so long that it has gone dormant. The great news is it’s still there… it simply needs a little coaxing, which question 3 addresses.)

 

3. What topic(s) most intrigues me? How much time do I devote to feeding my curiosity?

 

Without realizing it, we often put our curiosities to the side and force ourselves to focus (as best we can) on doing the work we should and abandon the work that feeds our soul.

 

Fortunately, we can do both—feed our families and our curiosity. In fact, Elizabeth Gilbert wrote an exceptional book about this very topic called Big Magic.

 

4. Who do I most enjoy sharing time with?

 

By creating an ever-expanding list of people we enjoy sharing time with, we naturally begin looking for ways to spend more time with them. The more time we spend with them, the less time we have for those we don’t. 

 

5. Who can I focus on helping to reach their goals/dreams?

 

It’s entirely too easy to become obsessed with and exhausted by our own success. By balancing our goals with giving, we release the pressure while increasing our impact. The key here is to focus on helping them, rather than serving our unconscious agenda. True service is serene regardless of outcome.

 

Speaking of giving—I would love to hear about your goals and dreams. If I can play even a small part in making them a reality, I would be honored.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. A very special “Thank you” goes to Mark LeBlanc for leading the way to greatness.  

 

We shy away from sharing or expanding into what we have to offer in the most obscure ways. We think that getting out of our comfort zone means doing something big, which is exactly what keeps us trapped and doing what we’ve always done.

 

Finishing up lunch with a client at a nice restaurant in Baltimore, Maryland, I kept thinking about that beautiful basket of bread (that we didn’t even touch) going into the trash. While a business lunch is perhaps not the right environment to request a to-go box for the bread, I found myself imagining the delight of handing it off to a homeless person on my drive home.

 

Fortunately, my image of giving outweighed my concerns about perception and I asked them to package it. Excited to hand over this generous helping of deliciousness, I started my drive home.

 

Of course, as fate would have it, I didn’t see a single homeless person on my 20-minute drive home. Not one… dozens on the way there, and not one on the way home. Five minutes from home, I realized this bread was about to go into my trash—or maybe to the birds, but still. My vision of giving was squashed and no one was going to have a chance to enjoy it.

 

Just as I was thinking about where I could go to find someone in need, I passed under a bridge where three men were doing construction work and thought, “They might enjoy the bread.” Concerned about offending them, I immediately dismissed the idea and drove right past them.

 

My car decided not to dismiss the idea, though.

 

At the roundabout just ahead, my car (or God, if you prefer) took me all the way around the circle and back in the direction of the construction workers. Pulling over onto the shoulder, I said to myself, “Just give them the bread and go.”

 

“Umm… excuse me guys,” I got their attention, “I was just at a restaurant… where they put gobs of yummy bread on the table… they were just going to throw it away, even though no one touched it. Would you like it?”

 

“We would love it,” they said, taking the bread from my hands and immediately tearing into it.

 

“Just so you guys know, I talk a big game about doing stuff that makes you uncomfortable. I just did mine for today—thank you for helping me out!”

 

They laughed—I laughed, and then I drove home. That was it. And that is it. It’s the simple little steps we take in the direction of our goals and dreams that matter most. Sure, sometimes we have to ratchet up our courage to make significant progress, but it’s mostly tiny doses of discomfort that lead to greatness emerging.

 

Giving doesn’t have to be grandiose, and progress can be easily passed over when we get caught up in perfection.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

In a rush to get from one experience to the next, we may miss the simple and seemingly superfluous opportunities to inspire greatness. Believing that inspiration only comes in oversized packages, we may forget to look for the tiny (barely noticeable, really) opportunities to inspire others into action.

 

Having an “off” day and needing a shift in scenery, I headed to the pool for a workout. The moment I pulled into the parking lot, I started talking myself out of swimming—“It’s been a rough day… I could just go across the street and grab a hot tea, read and relax,” I thought.

 

Has this ever happened to you?

 

Before putting my car into reverse and heading over to grab that tea, I made a promise to myself—“Just do a short workout… Get in and get out… a little something is better than nothing,” I thought, “and it might make me feel better.”

 

Just as I finished my short workout, the lady I had been sharing a lane with stopped and asked me, “What team are you training for?”

 

Considering I had unintentionally swum up on her back during that workout, I thought maybe she was trying to figure out why I had encroached on her space.

 

“No, I don’t train with any team,” I said, “I’m still new to this swimming thing… sorry I swam onto your back.”

 

“Your new? You look like you’ve been swimming all your life. You’re a very good swimmer,” she said, and then turned and walked away.

 

After I yelled out “Thank you,” suddenly I had an extra burst of energy, which I promptly used to add an extra thousand meters to my workout that day. Those words, from that stranger, fueled an extra thousand meters, plus a significant shift in my attitude. Image if she was someone I knew well and respected.

 

On my drive back from the pool that day, I saw a billboard—

 

See Something, Say Something.

 

While the intention behind the billboard is to get you to look for and call out negative behaviors, I’d like to suggest we use the same billboards as reminders to look for and acknowledge the good qualities we see in others. In fact, why not print off the graphic I’ve attached for you here and put it somewhere you’ll see everyday?

 

The simple act of witnessing and acknowledging excellence in others is one of the most powerful (and under used) ways to increase your impact.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

They should is a trap that kills enthusiasm and growth faster than any economic downturn ever could.

 

When you catch yourself thinking, “They should or shouldn’t,” stop and ask yourself, “How can I help them reach their goals?”

 

Consider letting go of the shoulds (work harder, pay their dues, respect me) and shouldn’ts (go above me, think so highly of themselves, be so lazy), and instead focus on communicating your vision while helping them reach their goals.

 

Their success is your success, regardless of whether you’re the boss or the employee. Embrace this truth, and watch your reputation and your results grow stronger. 

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Gain clarity on what’s preventing your growth, along with what will inspire it – get your Gearing for Greatness session Today: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

 

 

Greatness chases greatness. Companies and leaders in continuous pursuit of evolution (personal/company brand), worry more about keeping up with demand then poaching.

 

On the flipside, those who hoard resources and acknowledgment wind up losing their most precious assets to the competition.

 

Sitting in one of the nicest business clubs in Washington, DC, just before the start of an event, Lena, a fellow businesswoman, peeked over her computer and asked, “Excuse me, are you familiar with LinkedIn?”

 

“I’m no expert,” I said, “but what do you need?”

 

“If I accept a connection request, can they see my list of connections?”

 

“I think they can see who you’re connected to regardless,” I said, “But I’m not certain. Why?”

 

“The person trying to connect with me is a competitor, and I don’t want her marketing to my list. Should I accept the invitation to connect?”

 

Lena’s question reminded me of the one I’d heard just the day before, from a CEO of a company with a little more than 100 employees—“How do I praise (or even acknowledge) my team publicly when doing so gives my competitors access to the names of my best employees?”

 

There seems to be two valid perspectives on ‘competition’—

 

1. Beat them.
2. Use them as fuel to step up your game.

 

One is focused on winning for you while the other is focused on helping others win. One tends to come from a limited mindset while the other assumes an abundance… of people, resources, and opportunities.

 

Whether we’re talking about customers or employees, the philosophy shared by the Lena and the CEO is the same—if I share, I’ll have less. This is technically true, if you’re planning to stagnate.

 

If you plan to stop challenging yourself to develop skills, strengthen your team culture, build relationships and learn, then you should be concerned. Not about them, though.

 

“Progress always involves risk; you can’t progress to second base and also keep your foot on first.” –Christie Manson

 

By focusing on becoming more valuable in any profession, you naturally attract more customers and opportunities to share your talents. By focusing on improving your ability to serve and generously serving those who show up, you keep the wheels in motion for growth.

 

Through their consistent pursuit of excellence in company culture and leadership, Honest Tea, Zappos, Google, Menlo Innovations and others have become magnets to some of the world’s greatest talent. They could have hoarded talent and protected their secret recipes; instead, these leaders opened their doors and said, “Come learn about what we’re doing.”

 

As a leader, sales professional, entrepreneur, barista or even a mechanic, what mindset have you adopted as your own? How are you ensuring consistent evolution?  

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. Ready to step into your greatness… to uncover your purpose and figure out how to cash in on your talents? Book your Gearing For Greatness session today.

Confidence in nearly every endeavor comes with a sense of knowing or familiarity. In sports, strengthening the fundamentals is key to making critical decisions in a split second.

 

The same thing is true when it comes to gaining confidence in yourself. 

 

Confidence in yourself increases in direct portion to self-awareness. The more experience you have with self-talk, the more confidence you’ll have. Self-awareness leads to self-confidence. By becoming aware of the results you’re creating every day, you have the power to change them.

 

Here are 10 daily habits to strengthening your self-confidence:

 

Review. At the end of every day, carve out 10-20 minutes to review the day. Write about what worked well and what didn’t work so well. At the end of the month, review what you wrote and watch as patterns begin emerging.      

 

Challenge. Set a specific, tangible, measurable and meaningful goal. The more challenging it is, the greater the wisdom you gain. The lessons learned in pursuit of any goal effects our confidence in every other area of life. Athletics, learning new skills, academics, adventure, career, etc.—each one impacts the others.

 

Meditate. Begin by sitting comfortably for five undisrupted minutes every day. Close your eyes and notice the thoughts running through your mind, the pace of your heart, the sounds around you, the areas of your body that feel tense and relaxed. The key: simply notice—no positive or negative judgments.

 

Feedback. Ask people to help you understand how you come across, what works well and what simple adjustments can be made to get even better results.

 

Learn. Read a chapter or two of an instructional book, watch a TED Talk, attend a lecture or simply observe a colleague, boss, employee, or even a child. Take note of what others do/don’t do that works, or works against them. Write about this during your daily review time.

 

Share. Teach, mentor or coach others on the lessons you’ve learned and/or the skills you’ve gained. Doing so is a great way to deepen your understanding, while strengthening relationships and encouraging collaboration.

 

Laugh. Watch a funny video on YouTube, look up your favorite comedian (or find one—Ellen Degeneres is one of my favs!), or call a buddy who always seems to have a joke or funny experience to share.

 

Get Inspired. Expose yourself to people and experiences that inspire you. TED Talks, podcasts, spiritual teachers, courageous memoirs, listening to another persons’ story, and noticing kindness in action are all excellent ways get inspired.

 

Give. Foster a meaningful introduction, acknowledge/appreciate others, smile, hug, send a notecard in the mail, contribute to someone’s fundraising goal, listen generously, or even give your favorite shirt to the person admiring it. The gift is for the giver.

 

Exercise. Get your heart rate up for 30 minutes every day. A brisk walk, running, weight lifting, push-ups, air squats, lunges, tennis, yoga, kick boxing, swimming, biking, and even Wii Fit are all excellent ways to get your heart rate up.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

I had the great privilege of being in Kara DelVecchio’s audience at a recent conference focused on women in leadership in the Washington, DC area. Her stories and passion were enough to capture my attention for well over an hour—in fact, I was nearly late getting set up for a session I was responsible for because I was so intrigued.

 

When she agreed to let me interview her for this podcast, my fingers couldn’t type my questions quickly enough. Her journey, curiosity, courage and compassion are enlivening and inspiring—so was this interview. Enjoy!

 

Resources from the interview:

 

--Willful Blindness by Margret Heffernan

--The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer

--Kara on LinkedIn

 

About Kara:

 

Kara DelVecchio is the Vice President of Sales, responsible for North American revenue for WeddingWire. She oversees an inside sales team of more than 150 sales professionals and is focused on delivering profitable growth and scaling the organization for future success.

 

Prior to joining WeddingWire, Kara held a variety of roles at Corporate Executive Board, and most recently served as Executive Director of North American sales overseeing a $400m revenue line. Kara has more than 15 years of experience leading complex sales organizations in a fast paced environment and managing client relationships with Fortune 500 executives.

 

Kara holds a Bachelors Degree from Florida Atlantic University and a Masters Degree from the University of Virginia.  She lives in Alexandria, Virginia with her husband Robert and three children.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

Confidence comes from the Latin word confide, which means to entrust. Self-confidence, then, is about learning to trust yourself with yourself. Just as it takes experiences over time to trust others, trusting in your own experience of life requires that same kind of intention and attention.

 

Remember the first time you sat behind the steering wheel of a car to drive? With your heart pumping, you tried to remember all the critical elements of driving, like gas! Too focused on adjusting the mirrors, getting your seat just right and thinking through all the rules of the road, you completely forgot to look at the gas gauge.

 

Caught up in the busyness of traffic five minutes into your lesson, your instructor asks, “Without looking at the gauge, how much gas do we have?”

 

Clueless, you add check gas gauge to your mental checklist for your next excursion.

After several months, you start getting the hang of this driving thing, pass your test and venture out on the road alone for the first time, loving the freedom. Before you know it, you’re flying down the road, blaring music, while eating a burger and joking with friends.

 

How did you go from gripping the steering wheel to grabbing a bite, while effortlessly shifting in and out of lanes? The obvious answer is intendaware.

 

Intendaware: To intentionally become aware of the beliefs and behaviors that enable results you want. (I’ll be sure to add the word to Wikipedia soon.)

 

By intentionally becoming aware of the various elements of driving, you shifted your critical checklist over to automatic behaviors.

 

Gaining self-confidence works the same way. By intentionally becoming aware of your behaviors and results, you increase self-awareness. Such awareness, along with a heavy dose of compassion, leads to an increase in self-confidence.

 

The better you understand and like yourself, the greater your self-confidence will be. The challenge comes in when you discover behaviors or beliefs you dislike, which almost always leads to criticism—self-inflicted, mostly.

 

Just as you quickly discovered that you forgot to look at the gas gauge, you will undoubtedly begin finding areas for improvement in your own behaviors. While such mistakes are acceptable (expected, really) when learning to drive, we do not naturally grant ourselves permission to not know in most areas of life, ourselves included.

 

It’s actually this lack of permission that leads to defending the very behaviors that produce results we don’t want. Thus, as Carl Young once said, “What you resist persists.”

 

By giving yourself permission to not know yourself, you give yourself a chance to discover. The great news is that discovery (awareness) itself is the most important element to shifting behaviors, and therefore results. Once you are aware of the fact, for example, that your opinions are not being taken seriously in the boardroom, you can begin investigating the beliefs and behaviors that may be causing this result.

 

With such authentic curiosity, you may quickly find that you have unintentionally avoided taking a seat at the table while simultaneously increasing your pitch when sharing ideas. Without recognizing it, you may have set yourself up for being glossed over or ignored. By remaining focused on discovery (awareness), you can gain insights without fighting (resisting) and begin experimenting with new behaviors and beliefs.

 

You may find that certain behaviors challenge your belief system and then need time to sort out what beliefs will most closely support the evolution of your spirit, along with the attainment of your goals.

 

While this is not the easiest work on the planet, it is the most reliable way to systematically increase your confidence.

 

Confidence comes with knowing, knowing comes with discovery and discovery is a lifelong process that commands heaps of humor, hugs and hustle. So sit back, grab a cup of tea, open your notebook and get ready to begin incorporating the top 10 daily habits to increased confidence—up next week.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

 

When asked what it was like to be blind, Helen Keller said, “It's much better to have no sight than it is not to have a vision.”

 

While some people seem to be born with a clear vision for their life that naturally morphs into their career and inspires their team, most of us have to take the time to allow our vision to emerge. Interestingly, the difficulty in creating a vision isn’t what we think it is.

 

Creating a clear picture of a desired future that inspires us requires a two-pronged approach: being and doing. We’re very good at doing, and lack intensely in being and noticing. Few allow themselves the time to do the mundane tasks that provoke awareness and cause (day)dreaming, critical elements in the visioning process.

 

(Day)dreaming feels like a waste of time because it lacks a sense of accomplishment. And, being present to our thoughts is almost always anxiety producing and uncomfortable. In a community that almost exclusively celebrates doing over being, such a focus is both foreign and uncomfortable.

 

While doing leaves us with a clear sense of accomplishment, noticing what triggers emotion inside of us does not. Yet, it’s noticing what triggers our emotions that gives us the fuel necessary to not only create a vision, but see it through to completion.

 

Twelve years ago, I was angry with seasoned professionals, who clearly did not understand that my intention was to do a good job, contribute, and help the team succeed. Instead, I came across as needy, unwilling to pay my dues, and entitled. That last one really irritated me.

 

“Why shouldn’t we all be entitled to give every ounce of what we have to offer,” I thought, soon after I quit my job and started researching. It was anger that fueled my research, curiosity, and passion. Had I ignored or suppressed my anger, I doubt I would have helped dozens of leaders to bridge the gap between generations.

 

It was my realization that every person, regardless of generation, wants to contribute and feel the joy that comes from a sense of accomplishment that lead me to provoking greatness. When I see blinders to greatness, I want to shatter them.

 

This irritation (passion) probably also has to do with going from standing in front of a judge in juvenile court as a youngster, to breaking recorders in sports, and ultimately finishing three degrees before starting this business. We all have greatness inside of us, and many of us are waiting for permission (provocation) to share/live it.

 

It’s this realization that leads me to being purposeful and intentional with where I spend my time every day. When the ego gives way to greatness, and a whole team courageously steps into their passion (upping their game), waves of joy wash over me—it’s the reason I do this work. And there’s no way I would have ever gotten to such clarity had I ignored my irritation and stayed in that job.

 

Considering our comfort with doing, I want to offer a few, seemingly mundane, activities that lend themselves to noticing, being and daydreaming. Here they are:

 

1. Make a commitment of going once or twice a week, and then get yourself there. Just do it.
2. Grab a coloring book and give yourself a few hours to color.
3. Go someplace you’ve never gone, and have an experience you’ve never had. Doing so will give you new perspective on yourself and the world. This does not need to include an airplane or hotel stay, though it’s fun when it does!
4. Meet up groups are a great way to experience a variety of trails with others. You can always do the trails on your own later, if flying solo on a new trail isn’t comfortable.
5. For some (often men), this looks like messing around with projects in the garage. For others (often women), this looks like cooking, crocheting, or making stuff.

 

The key is to pick an activity that is meditative, and allows you to do while noticing your thoughts. 

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. If you’d like to attract the NFL players of your industry and aren’t sure where to begin, check out my latest book.

 

Margie Warrell  has inspired millions of people around the globe to use their courage as a weapon to combat fear. As an avid follower of Margie’s work, I was excited to have a chance to learn about her journey, along with her perspective on the current state of the world during these political times.

 

Throughout the interview, we talk about how she went from being the oldest of seven, growing up on a dairy farm, to interviewing and working with respected leaders including Sir Richard Branson, Kathy Calvin, Bill Marriott, and Marianne Williamson. We also dive into the specifics of how Margie helps leaders set the stage for greatness to emerge, both through her seminars and coaching.

 

More about Margie Warrell and how to get in touch—

 

Margie is the host of RawCourage.TV and a certified master coach. An acclaimed keynote speaker and guest lecturer at Columbia and Georgetown University, Margie’s also a sought after expert commentator with leading media such as the Wall Street Journal, Redbook, Psychology Today, Fox News, Today Show and Al Jazeera. Her Forbes Courage Works column has been read by millions.

 

A passionate advocate for gender equality, Margie founded Global Courage in 2010 to empower women to be braver leaders across all sectors of society. She’s since been appointed by the Australian government as the first Ambassador for Women in Global Business and is a Women’s Economic Forum honoree. She’s also an Ambassador for Beyond Blue committed to removing the stigma around mental illness that amplifies suffering for those affected by it (Margie’s family members among them.)

 

Gain access to Margie’s newest tools and resources by subscribing to her blog at www.MargieWarrell.com.

 

Additional resources mentioned during the podcast: Byron Katie.  

 

Margie, you are a blessing—Thank you for the work you do every day!

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

Just nine years away from what he referred to as the socially acceptable date for retirement, Sam shared about the fear of filling his time—“I need to keep my brain active, and I’m not sure what I’ll do without people needing my help, or the excitement of winning the deal. My work brings purpose and structure to my days.”

 

When work provides such a strong sense of identity, belonging and accolades, letting go of the known for what’s next can be terrifying. The feeling of being needed, having a sense of belonging, and the adrenaline of accomplishment can stop us from disconnecting on vacation, spending quality time with friends/family, relaxing or even retiring.

 

When habits are deeply rooted in accomplishment, it’s difficult to trust the stillness, especially when the accomplishments are netting accolades that stir cravings for more. These cravings can easily keep us hustling even when we’re ready to step into our next greatest area of contribution.

 

Experience (and research) has continuously demonstrated that the greatest way to see the path striving to reveal itself is by getting quiet, unplugging and listening intently.  Through silence and authentically connecting with ourselves, we gain the capacity to hear and see our greatness.

 

The silence grants us access to seeing our path, along with the grit (courage) to step onto it.

 

“I want to know God’s thoughts, the rest are details.” –Albert Einstein

 

Once there, the peace and freedom from incessant nagging to maintain a certain level of success diminishes. We begin to experience the truth of our inherent worthiness in the silence, and cease to need the adrenaline shots provided by external validation. Such stillness grants us the access we need to hear our next direction.

 

So, how do we explore such stillness in a way that is sustainable and enriching, rather than consuming and overwhelming? Start small, notice what’s helpful and then build on it.

 

Here’s a great way to get started:

 

1. Grab a timer and set it for five minutes.
2. Sit in a comfortable position with your hands resting on your knees, facing toward the sky, and then push the start button on the timer.
3. Close your eyes and notice the thoughts running through your mind, the pace of your heart, the sounds around you, the areas of your body that feel tense, and relaxed. The key: simply notice.

 

Becoming the observer of your own experiences is a natural and kind way of helping yourself see what you may be missing during the busyness of the day. This approach is far easier to incorporate and build upon then throwing ourselves into a multi-week silent meditation retreat.

 

Getting started and staying consistent are two critical elements to getting the most value out of meditation. Said simply, comfort and clarity don’t tend to come in one session, though the compound effect will aid greatly in gaining the clarity you seek.

 

When entering a new phase in life, it's natural to go through an "identity crisis" of sorts. After existing one way for a prolonged period of time, "flipping a switch" and living a different way feels unnatural and like a complete waste of time.

 

It's important to waste your time, though! Doing so allows us to realize things about ourselves that we never thought about until now. There are ways to use everyday (and even mundane) activities to gain the clarity you crave. It seems impossible, but once you have the roadmap for getting there, it won't seem so daunting.

 

Check back next week to find out why it's important to "waste" your time and what you can do to help carve the path you desire for your future.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

P.S. Been meditating for a while? Ready to add to your practice? The following are a few helpful additions:

 

—Add another five-minute session at a different time during the day.

—Put a pen and paper next to your meditation spot and give yourself a couple of extra minutes to write down any thoughts or ideas.

—Add breathing exercises or chanting to your meditation.

—Keeping your eyes closed, add stretching/movement. Doing so gives you a chance to feel where you may be holding tension. Pick one or two from this list to get started, and then trust your body to add in additional moves.     

—Increase from five minutes to ten minutes.

 

 

Imagine standing inside a giant jar of jellybeans, minus the beans and delicious smell.

Looking through the glass, you can see there is a label, but you cannot figure out what it says. You can also see dozens of other people, all within their respective jars, none of whom can see what’s written on their own label.

You can see their label and they can see yours, but no one can see their own.

This is exactly where most of us find ourselves when it comes to understanding our own greatness and how to improve. We want growth, but it’s difficult to know how without gaining insight from others. Since we think we’re supposed to know what’s on the label, we end up with a recipe for insanity and stalled performance.

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” –Albert Einstein

Creating a systematic approach to giving and receiving feedback ensures consistency in having a chance to gain perspective, share our own and evolve in the process.

Here are seven quick tips to make performance reviews effective:

Set Specific Goals. When you know what goals are important to each of your team members, performance reviews become a vehicle for helping them succeed.

Purposeful. When you tie feedback to meaningful and specific results (individual or team), incorporating your feedback becomes worthwhile. 

Railroad Approach. By helping your team recognize how their professional goals contribute to your team goals, you set yourself up to provide helpful feedback for both parties. 

Deliberate Distress. By consistently (daily, when possible) creating opportunities for giving and receiving feedback, you train your team to let their guards down while remaining open to feedback.  

Take note. When you see an opportunity for improvement, or a chance to acknowledge a job well done, share in the moment (when appropriate and helpful). Take note of the experience so that you can easily highlight behavior patterns during more formal reviews.  

Reflective. Good performance reviews require reflection. By allowing yourself time to reflect on your team’s individual performances, you arm yourself with thoughtful and specific feedback that’s actionable and growth provoking.

Keep it Real. By consistently seeking feedback, you keep yourself tapped into the challenge of receiving difficult feedback along with the joy of hearing what a great job you’ve done. Both are helpful in adjusting your approach to have the greatest impact on others.

Find your way toward consistency in this area of your leadership and watch as you become a magnet for greatness.

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

P.S. If you’d like to attract the NFL players of your industry and aren’t sure where to begin, check out my latest book.

 

There are tons of articles out there that discuss advancing your career—about seven million, to be exact. It shouldn’t be surprising to see why it’s a confusing topic. While there is no magic bullet, simple strategies can be taken to land the opportunities you want.

 

As I enjoyed a delicious breakfast with Stacey, a talented leader in the tech industry, I marveled at a story she shared about a young man, Keith, who has gone from being brand new in the industry to vying for a producer position in less than two years.

 

“He may just get it too, Misti,” Stacey shared, “And he’s up against well-established, credentialed producers who have a clear understanding of how to communicate across teams.”

 

Intrigued, I asked about what Keith had done to become one of the top two candidates vying for this position.

 

“If I didn’t know better, Misti, I would think he was being coached directly by you—seriously!” Stacey said, and then began listing the following actions he’d taken:

 

• Took it upon himself (time and money) to get scrum master certified after he found out the training was critical to the position.
• Reached out to a few producers and asked for a meeting to learn about what they do every day. He even job-shadowed them several times, helping out where he could.
• Sent follow up emails to those producers, thanking them for their time and explaining what he’d learned.
• Found out the position was coming available, and applied.
• Demonstrated both passion and interest as we went through the interview process—“His enthusiasm is infectious,” Stacey said.
• Sent “Thank you” emails to every person who was part of the interview process. In fact, here’s one of the emails he sent…

 

“I appreciate having had the opportunity to speak with you about the open Producer position. I am eager to apply the experience I’ve gained and help facilitate the needs of our teams while ensuring we deliver a product that our players will enjoy. I would also like to thank you again for the time you’ve spent giving me an inside look into how you work as a Producer and sharing your experiences with me that I can learn from. I’m looking forward to hearing the results of the interview and would be thrilled to have the opportunity to be a part of the Production team.”

 

After learning all this, I asked Stacey to compare these two candidates, along with her thought process for both.

 

“The veteran employee knows our processes, making it far easier to transition him into the position, immediately alleviating the burden to our extra load. Initially, Keith will take more effort to get going, but he may also bring fresh ideas, and help strengthen our processes,” Stacey said.

 

“Which one do you think your team will pick?” I asked, secretly hoping she’d say Keith. Okay, maybe it wasn’t so secret. ;)

 

“Probably the veteran employee, but I’m just not sure yet,” she said.

 

“Even if we pick the veteran this go round, I will personally meet with Keith and let him know that all his work has not gone unnoticed. I will keep my eyes and ears open for future opportunities, both within our company and elsewhere. I want to see him succeed,” Stacey said.

 

While they may need to go for the short-term benefits of experience this time, Keith will walk away with the bare minimum of interviewing experience, a team of producers who have been inspired by his hustle, and at least one career advocate. 

 

Which candidate would you pick?

 

“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou

 

Get inspired, share your enthusiasm, invest in yourself, say “thank you,” and apply for the position. Do this over and over again, and watch as you naturally progress into the opportunities you crave.

 

Find this information valuable? Please share the wealth! Forward it to your friends, colleagues, and bosses… and be sure to share on social media.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister     

 

P.S. Imagine the difference it could make for the veteran employee if he found a way to keep his enthusiasm high and his perspective fresh. Just as consistent exercise is critical to long-term health, exposure and inspiration are critical to enthusiasm and a fresh perspective.

 

P.P.S. If you’d like to attract the NFL players of your industry and aren’t sure where to begin, check out my latest book.

 

Being interviewed by such a powerfully present spiritual leader was one of the most special experiences of my career—Thank you, Sister Jenna.

 

During this short interview, we talked about how this year’s presidential election has the potential to instigate in U.S. citizens. We discussed how we can use these time to move us closer to our individual and collective greatness.  

 

The energy being produced from this election is powerful and valuable—are you getting full use of it to move your team, business, family and career forward? Listen in to learn how.

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

Seeking understanding is the last thing we want to do when someone has offended us, tainted our reputation, or put us in harm’s way. It’s far easier to hold tightly to our beliefs, keep our anger, and strengthen our story by gathering all the necessary data and buy-in from others.

 

It’s risky to seek their perspective and listen openly and authentically to their thought process, particularly when they might not demonstrate such concern in return. They may never ask about our experience, or even appreciate our interest in understanding theirs, making it far easier to keep our animosity and find a way to punish them.

 

“He’s my boss’s, boss’s, boss,” Brad said, “And I have no idea how to write the letter to his boss explaining how his poor choices put my life in danger. What do I do?”

 

“Do you have a way of contacting the man you’re upset with directly?” I asked.

 

“No. I mean… I know his name, but I don’t know his contact information.”

 

“Could you find it?”

 

“Well, maybe… but if I do talk to him then I can no longer anonymously submit a formal letter of complaint without the potential of losing my job.”

 

Considering his brush up against death while fighting a wild fire, I could appreciate his anger. I can also see what he might be giving up by going directly to a formal letter of complaint. By seeking to punish before seeking to understand their perspective, we lose our ability to—

 

a.) Challenge our own stories and grow in awareness,

b.) Learn the truth behind their decisions, and

c.) Offer insights that may very well save others from the same experience. 

 

By consistently giving ourselves a chance to understand another person’s perspective (especially when anger is present), we stretch our heart, develop compassion, and strengthen relationships. Such actions create a sense of safety in our presence and serve to strengthen trust. 

 

If it’s true that most of us are doing the best we can with the information we have in the moment, does it make sense to risk our tightly held beliefs in service of growth? Is it possible that by assuming well of others and seeking to understand them, we attract the same kind of understanding in our life?

 

While learning to listen in the face of pain (anger, sadness, and even grief) is far from easy, practicing cannot help but strengthen our own courage while deepening trust. 

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. If you’d like to attract the NFL players of your industry and aren’t sure where to begin, check out my latest book.

 

Struggling with a small staff? Need to find a way to get the ones you have fully engaged? Here are three key steps to take:

 

Clarify Outcomes

 

Beyond shareholder value, bonuses and becoming “the best,” consider gaining clarity and communicating consistently these three elements:

 

• How does your product/service contribute to your customers’ needs? And, how does your company/team deliver the product/service that adds great value to your customers’ lives?
• Why do you personally care about the outcomes of your work?
• Why does your team care about the outcomes of their work? What are they striving to achieve in their career?

 

Employees who are passionate, driven and highly engaged seek leaders (often subconsciously) with such clarity.

 

Vulnerability

 

People in positions of authority often think they’re supposed to be the ones with all the answers. So, they bark orders under the guise of, “I pay you to do a job,” without realizing their team will most strongly support the ideas they help to create.

 

Consider sharing your challenges openly (to the extent possible) with your team and ask for their ideas/suggestions. As you listen and take notes, request help in achieving success. Focus on and reward the ones who step up, and watch as others begin following suit.

 

Build Trust

 

While autonomy requires accountability, the simple act of trusting your team to do their best work is empowering. As you build trust, find your balance between keeping a close eye, anticipating pitfalls and giving them the freedom to learn from their failures.

 

Communication is critical as specific outcomes are clarified and trust is built. Focus your time and attention on clarifying milestones, celebrating achievements and rewarding engagement. 

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

Ready for clarity of direction? Sign up today: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

Yogi Roth is a Pac-12 Networks college football analyst, Filmmaker, Scholar, New York Times Best-Selling Author, accomplished Coach, Motivational Speaker, Media Personality, Host and World-Traveler who has been studying human potential for over a decade.

 

Most recently, Roth made his directorial debut with the documentary feature film, LIFE IN A WALK, which took home the Outstanding Achievement in Filmmaking Award at the Newport Beach Film Festival. LIFE IN A WALK follows Roth and his father, Will, on their trek along the Camino De Santiago, a famous pilgrimage through Portugal and Spain, where he listens to, learns from and discovers more about his hero than he ever imagined.

 

He is also the co-founder of Win Forever, LLC with Pete Carroll, which is an applied mindset training program for corporate leaders to develop a culture of high performance for individuals and teams to become the very best in their fields.

 

Throughout his career, Yogi has been exposed to some of the best coaches, thinkers and leaders. Such exposure has given him a chance to see first-hand what it takes to become a magnet to greatness. When I asked him to share some of their secrets, I was expecting to hear about teamwork, focus and hard work. In truth, his answer was far simpler, incredibly power and instructive.

 

During this interview, Yogi also shares about some of his greatest life challenges, along with the habits that have allowed him to gain the most value from each.

 

Enjoy!

 

Click here to learn more about Yogi Roth.

 

Yogi, a special thank you for generously sharing your time, stories and techniques for living with our listeners—your dedication to greatness is inspirational, and I’m grateful to know you!  

 

Resources mentioned during the interview:

The Alchemist

The Road to Character

The Rise of Superman

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. If you’d like to attract the NFL players of your industry and aren’t sure where to begin, check out my lastest book.

 

“Through the power of listening and summarizing situations, Misti has an uncanny way of motivating not just you but your whole team!” – Susan Malone, Executive Director at Wide Angle Youth Media

 

Ever been in a touristy area where you were bombarded with restaurant staff doing their best dance to get your into their establishment? Often, they start with their own version of “hello,” and then quickly make their way to, “Come eat?”

The first couple of times, saying, “No, thank you,” is no big deal. But after a while it gets annoying, and you start avoiding their side of the road.

Even still, one lady in Sorrento, Italy, called out across the road to us, “Hey girls, what are you doing?” Apparently, she thought this approach would work better than her usual of, “Come and eat girls?”

“We’re going for a walk,” I responded, avoiding eye contact and continuing in the direction of the shops.

“Well, stop walking and come eat,” she commanded, as if such a tactic might actually work. And it did, just not to her advantage. It literally made me stop and think—If you have to beg us to eat there, your food probably isn’t very good.

From that moment forward, we avoided any restaurant with staff trying to lure us in, and used Trip Advisor as our guide. Interestingly, the restaurants we found through our searches were so busy making delicious food and taking care of their customers that they didn’t need someone on the streets luring people in.

The reality of this experience got me thinking—Where do I spend time begging in my life, and why? It didn’t take long to begin seeing where I have unknowingly begged—friendships, customers, appreciation, opportunities and even love.

There’s a distinct difference between asking and begging. The artist painting in the middle of the piazza in Aci Castello—a small town just outside of Catania, Italy—demonstrated the art of asking when she put the painting I was eyeing into my hands. Not ready to buy yet, I thanked her, put it down and walked away. Unable to get her passionate energy and beautiful artwork out of my mind, I found my way back to the piazza the next night and joyfully watched as she painted the picture I took home.

Beyond the painting, I bought her confidence, passion, and love of the craft. She’s in business to make money, but ultimately it was her unbridled love for her work that lured me back out late into the evening as I watched her masterpiece come to life. It was an experience I will remember for a lifetime and a lesson that will stay with me forever.

Customers, friends, and moments of appreciation come and go, but our passion and love for our craft (and ourselves) grows in proportion to the attention we give it. While we’ll never be able to control whether or not people like, appreciate, or pick us for the opportunity, we get to control the time and effort put into sharing our passion, while learning to trust that the right people will come and the wrong ones will go. As one social media expert once said, “The people who want your stuff, want your stuff.”

The idea is simple and incredibly instructive. Rather than waste time begging people to pick you, focus, focus, focus on strengthening your confidence as you share your passion. People buy confidence because it’s unique and tasty.

By focusing on making delicious dishes and creating a unique eating experience, these restaurants wind up with excellent reviews and attracting even more customers who want the very experience they love to offer. The best chefs, artists, sales professionals, speakers, engineers and the like, love their craft and they want to share it with the world. Do you?

Consider joining me in taking on this challenge for 1 year: focus your time and energy on loving the work you do and asking for opportunities to do more of the work you love. Show up, give your best, acknowledge yourself, appreciate the lessons you’ll undoubtedly encounter, and watch as you become the one with rave reviews and a line up of opportunities knocking on your door.

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

P.S. If you’d like to attract the NFL players of your industry and aren’t sure where to begin, check out my latest book.

 

Busy, overwhelmed “Yeser’s” listen up. Yes, there’s a reason we keep getting asked to take on more—we say “Yes,” and we are the one’s who will make sure the job gets done, even if our other projects suffer and we wind up sick from exhaustion.

 

Why do we keep getting picked to do the project? Because we are driven doers. We’ll run through fire to honor our word, and we’re the first to admit it. In fact, it’s a badge of honor we wear. In our quest to get it all in, we say, “Yes!” It’s an honorable and awesome quality, and I love us for it!

 

The problem comes in when our badge of honor is not tempered with focus and freedom… to say “no.” When our inability to say “no,” or “not now,” leads to illness, exhaustion, anxiety, sleepless nights, or, worse yet, passing out at an event where we’re in charge (yes, I witnessed this happen just a couple of weeks ago), it’s time to investigate the story we tell ourselves that leads to saying “Yes” at every chance.

 

Fear—of…

 

… missing out,

… letting people down,

… being seen as weak (admitting I can’t handle it, which leads to cockiness),

… an imperfect result that anyone, but you, would create,

… losing opportunities, and

… disappointing others

 

—are the biggest culprits of biting off more than we can chew, and they wind up robbing us of the chance to do our best work. Can you imagine the results we could create if we’d simply focus our “Yeses” on the right projects, and become a steward of opportunity for additional projects?

 

Instead of spending every moment of our days rushing—to work, through emails, the first pot of coffee, every meeting—what if we could enjoy our work, and wind up energized at the end of the day?

 

The following are three steps that have helped me learn to identify and enjoy my right “yeses”:

 

Step One: Clarity of focus. Start by giving yourself 10 minutes (preferably an hour) to think about the results you’re most committed to (i.e. customer satisfaction on project X, helping my team advance, gaining opportunities to share my message from the platform). If you serve on multiple boards, run a business, and have a family, think about the most important outcome for each area. What are you striving to accomplish, and why does it matter to you? Here’s a great resource for mapping your career.

 

While saying no to big projects may not be your area of struggle, consider investigating your greatest time sinks. Eager to strengthen relationships, I typically spend a great deal of time in one-on-one’s, even if I’m unsure of the purpose behind the meeting. A quick 15-20 minute phone conversation has become my new saving grace to bringing focus and clarity to these meetings. 

 

Step Two: Forty-eight hour rule. When you get that ego-boosting request to take on another project, simply say, “Thank you for thinking of me—I love being a part of great projects. Do you mind giving me until the end of the day tomorrow to give you a decision on this? With so many balls in the air right now, I want to make sure I can devote the time and energy to this project.”

 

Step Three: Help them find someone. It is an honor to be asked to take on projects, and if your plate is full, you get to steward opportunity—the greatest leadership quality of all. Taking time to learn about the goals and future aspirations of the folks around you will give you the information you need to know who would appreciate the exposure and opportunity. Note, I did not say, “Find someone who can do the job as well as you.” That thinking will trap you into doing the work yourself. Instead, focus on connecting the ones who want opportunity with those who need the help.

 

Identifying the direction you want to take your career, and recognizing the greater contribution you want to make, is the hardest part. But, once you’ve got it (and it’s always evolving, so consider coming back to step one at least once a quarter), doing your best work, and stewarding opportunity, becomes much easier.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

 

—Your work/career

—Leading your team

—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Working with Misti Burmeister will be one of the best decisions you have ever made as a leader. She helped me integrate new behaviors and thought processes to bolster my overall leadership presence.” –Kevin Frick, Professor and Dean, Johns Hopkins Carey School of Business

 

We don’t bat an eye at spending countless hours researching and figuring out how to use our new cell phone and all the awesome applications we’ve downloaded. We invest our time, money, and resources in getting the best gadgets on the planet, forgetting that we are our most valuable resource.

 

Imagine the difference you could make for yourself if you stopped to notice what’s working (and not working) in your life by consistently carving out time to reflect. Such information aids greatly in overall energy, enthusiasm and excitement for work, team members, and life. Your surroundings are consistently providing feedback—the challenge is in stopping long enough to benefit from the wisdom you receive.

 

The following are four topics you can use for daily journaling. Pick one or two to get started, commit to writing every day, and build from there.

 

Gratitude—what are you most grateful for and why? (i.e. I get to swim at an awesome facility, I have wonderful friends, and awesome cats. I’m grateful for Byron Katie, Michael Singer, Rachel Naomi Remen, and many others for putting their wisdom in books I get to read.)

 

Learning—what did you learn about yourself, the world, or your surroundings in this day? (i.e. I laugh loudly when I’m at a networking event where no one knows me, and coal and charcoal are derived from different substances.)

 

My qualities—what positive qualities did you demonstrate in this day? (i.e. I’m a good listener, joyful, and patient.)

 

Contribution—whose life did you contribute to today? (i.e. Karen got a listening ear, Mike got ice cream and a meaningful conversation, complete strangers got to hear authentically kind words about themselves.) The key here is to focus on what others are getting, rather than what you’re giving.

 

Now, let’s take studying yourself to a whole new level. The following are specific questions to answer if your having problems getting going. Pick one or two and explore your answers as you reflect quietly with yourself, pen to paper.

 

1. What most inspired (or frustrated) me in this day, or during this time in my life, and why?
2. When do I most feel joyful, happy, and filled with positive energy (or irritable, anger, or frustrated)? What’s happening, and what’s going through my mind during these times?
3. Who do I most enjoy sharing time with, and why?
4. If I could go back to school and push the restart button on my career, what would I study, and why?
5. If I could build a life I never needed a vacation from, how would I structure my days? What are some of the elements I know I’d want to include?
6. What am I most proud of and why?
7. Who are the top three most inspirational people I’ve experienced in my life, and why?
8. Where do I most want to forgive myself?
9. In a year from now, I will be…
10. Describe someone who is a hero and describe why.
11. Describe the culture of your work environment.
12. What kind of a day did you have and why?
13. What is a book, movie, song, or television program that has influenced you, and how?

 

Your answers to these questions may change over time, so be sure to come back to this list periodically, review your answers, and make changes and updates where appropriate.

 

Ready to take this process to yet another valuable level? Once you’ve written for a couple of weeks, conclude your writing time by going back and reading one or two journal entries. Overtime time you’ll begin to notice patterns, empowering you with the information you need to make important adjustments.

 

“Don’t just get through the day, get from the day.” –Jim Rohn

 

Get from each day by reflecting, processing, and discovering your greatness every day.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Working with Misti Burmeister will be one of the best decisions you have ever made as a leader. She helped me integrate new behaviors and thought processes to bolster my overall leadership presence.” –Kevin Frick, Professor and Dean, Johns Hopkins Carey School of Business

 

 

Seeking understanding is the last thing we want to do when someone has offended us, tainted our reputation, or put us in harm’s way. It’s far easier to hold tightly to our beliefs, keep our anger, and strengthen our story by gathering all the necessary data and buy-in from others.

It’s risky to seek their perspective and listen openly and authentically to their thought process, particularly when they might not demonstrate such concern in return. They may never ask about our experience, or even appreciate our interest in understanding theirs, making it far easier to keep our animosity and find a way to punish them.

“He’s my boss’s, boss’s, boss,” Brad said, “And I have no idea how to write the letter to his boss explaining how his poor choices put my life in danger. What do I do?”

“Do you have a way of contacting the man you’re upset with directly?” I asked.

“No. I mean… I know his name, but I don’t know his contact information.”

“Could you find it?”

“Well, maybe… but if I do talk to him then I can no longer anonymously submit a formal letter of complaint without the potential of losing my job.”

Considering his brush up against death while fighting a wild fire, I could appreciate his anger. I can also see what he might be giving up by going directly to a formal letter of complaint. By seeking to punish before seeking to understand their perspective, we lose our ability to—

a.) Challenge our own stories and grow in awareness,

b.) Learn the truth behind their decisions, and

c.) Offer insights that may very well save others from the same experience. 

By consistently giving ourselves a chance to understand another person’s perspective (especially when anger is present), we stretch our heart, develop compassion, and strengthen relationships. Such actions create a sense of safety in our presence and serve to strengthen trust. 

If it’s true that most of us are doing the best we can with the information we have in the moment, does it make sense to risk our tightly held beliefs in service of growth? Is it possible that by assuming well of others and seeking to understand them, we attract the same kind of understanding in our life?

While learning to listen in the face of pain (anger, sadness, and even grief) is far from easy, practicing cannot help but strengthen our own courage while deepening trust. 

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

 

While sitting in a plush conference room, staring out at a beautiful lake, and sipping the green tea that was automatically dispensed for me at the push of a button, I found myself eager to get to know the gentleman responsible for building this empire. He was a handsome man in his late forties, wearing a sharp-looking suit, and walked with an air of confidence almost expected with such success.

I found myself wondering if he understood just how intimidating his demeanor and words could come across. “Yes, I’ve gotten that feedback several times throughout my career,” he said. By the end of the meeting, I learned that nearly every relationship that was not strictly business related had disappeared, and he was struggling with loneliness and isolation in a profound and disturbing way.

Success has very little to do with the dollar amount in your bank account, and everything to do with the way you spend your resources—time, money, etc. A joyful experience of life, most days, has become my barometer of success. The more often one feels and shares joy, the more successful they are.

From this context, the following are the top 9 habits successful people practice every day:

Gratitude 

By choosing to focus on what there is to be grateful for, successful people naturally look for and attract more of the same. 

Try this: Before a meal, share one thing you’re grateful for that happened in that day. If you’re eating with someone, consider sharing one attribute you’re grateful for in them—it’s a great way to strengthen relationships and focuses your attention on the goodness in others.  

Give – time and resources

The act of giving is in itself a gift to oneself. Giving is receiving—helping others is helping yourself.

Try this: Focus on giving (time and resources) every day, without the expectation of receiving something in return.  

Appreciate others

By appreciating and acknowledging others, successful people get to feel both connected and appreciated. 

Try this: Intentionally look for reasons to appreciate others, and point out the specific act/behavior/attitude you appreciate in them. Focus on this every day for six weeks and notice how you feel at the end of the six weeks.   

Provoke (challenge) themselves and others

By focusing on challenging themselves, being vulnerable and going for greatness, successful people naturally inspire others to do the same.

Try this: Identify a specific outcome important to you, gain clarity about why it’s important, share it with your team and then go make it happen. Authentically share your struggles (fears) and your triumphs, ask for their support and encourage (challenge) them to do the same. 

Reflect

Successful people figure out what’s working (and not working) by consistently carving out time to reflect.

Try this: at the end of each day, grab a notebook and write about what went well and what didn’t go so well. What would you do differently, and why? Your surroundings are consistently providing feedback—the challenge is in stopping long enough to benefit from the wisdom you receive.

Self-Affirmation

It is natural to want to hear how great you are. When you learn to validate yourself, freedom is the outcome. Being able to experience external kindness as so-nice-to-have, but not critical to your joy in work or life, is liberating.

Try this: At the end of each day, write down three good qualities you demonstrated. In a couple of weeks, go back over and read what you’ve written about yourself. If you see the same qualities repeated, challenge yourself to look for new ones, while appreciating the ones you’ve noted.

Exercise

Whether you go for a brisk walk, lift weights, swim or play a game of tennis, the key is to elevate your heart rate, connect with your body and release joy-inducing hormones.

Try this: Block time every day for exercise and treat it like one of the most important meetings of your day. Doing a little bit (20-30 minutes) every day is a great way to begin building the foundation for your fitness.

Learn

Whether in the mind or body, stagnation leads to stench. Successful people keep their mind/brain vibrant by carving out time every day for learning. 

Try this: Grab that handy notebook and take note of what you learn each day. Consider writing a list of all the thought-provoking activities you engage in each week. These two exercises will help you see the truth about the time you spend learning and they’ll keep you on your toes, learning and growing.

Contribute

Finding ways to contribute to the career and life of those around them makes perfect sense to successful people. Beyond recognizing that giving is receiving, they understand that your success is their success.

Try this: Make it a habit to take note of at least one way you contributed to someone else’s career/life at the end of every day.

The key to each of these habits is to do them every day.

As you slowly add in new habits, you may notice you don’t have enough time to do everything you’ve been doing and your new habits. This tension is a natural part of change. Slowly, over time, you will weed out the activities that provide less benefit so that you can focus on the ones that bring joy to your life. 

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! Gain clarity on what’s preventing your growth, along with what will inspire it – get your Gearing for Greatness session Today: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

 

Without growth, companies, teams, leaders, and careers stagnate. Stagnation leads to hording, silos, distrust, conflict, and tension. Without a growth-provoking intervention, such stagnation quickly causes complacency, hording of resources, turnover, or worse yet, disengagement.

Disengaged employees not only fail to do their best work, but they actively share their negativity with colleagues and customers alike, sabotaging your reputation and halting growth.

To avoid the stench of stagnation, consider stepping up to the challenges associated with each the following 5 pitfalls to growth:

Failure to continue learning

“I don’t have time to read, listen, watch… to master a new skill, to learn about a new industry, or focus on building new relationships… I am busy!” In fairness, I get it—you are busy. And, considering your commitment to growth, here are a few questions to provoke clarity of direction. 

Challenge: Ask yourself, “What am I (or my team) so busy striving to achieve, specifically? And, why does success matter to me?” Be honest with yourself before you move to the next question—“If I had extra time and plenty of resources, what would I want to learn about, who would I want to meet, and what event would I attend?”

Exposing yourself to new industries, topics, sports, and conferences leads to innovation, ideas, and interests that fuel passion, enthusiasm, and growth.

Refuse to share

The prevailing thought is—if I share what I know, I’ll be replaced by younger and cheaper labor. In truth, the more you share, the more trusted and respected you become. The more you share what you know, the more time you’ll have to keep advancing, making you even more valuable. 

Challenge: Ask yourself, “What project could I bring others into right now, or in the next three months? Who needs to be introduced to whom? Who might be interested in learning and contributing to this project, or attending important meetings with me? What skills/experiences would I like to gain in the next six months, and how can I begin sharing what I know so that I have the time and energy for growth?

Failure to continuously communicate

“I told them the goal… why do they need constant reminders? I hired them to get the job done… they should focus on doing their job.” They should is a trap that kills enthusiasm and growth faster than any economic downturn ever could.

Challenge: Ask yourself, “Do I know my specific goal and why it matters to me? Do I authentically care about the goal? When was the last time I shared my passion, our progress and encouraged others to do the same? How do I keep my vision, enthusiasm, passion, direction, and progress out in the open consistently?”

Avoid difficult conversations

“I would rather get a root canal than have that conversation,” a senior executive at a Fortune 500 company said after I encouraged him to address a vastly underperforming senior leader with truth and accountability.

Joel Salatin of PolyFace Farms said, “Disruption is critical to growth.” This is true whether we’re talking about growing grass, livestock, relationships, or the bottom line.

Challenge: Ask yourself, “What conversation am I avoiding, and what are the costs associated? What are the positive (and negative) outcomes associated with having an open and honest conversation?”

Failure to pause/reflect

We don’t bat an eye at spending countless hours researching and figuring out how to use our new cell phone and all the awesome applications. We invest our time, money, and resources in getting the best gadgets on the planet, forgetting that we are our most valuable resource.

Imagine the difference you could make for yourself if you stopped to notice the moments you feel joyful or irritable. Such information could greatly aid your overall energy, enthusiasm and excitement for your work, your team, and your life. 

Challenge: Open your calendar and ask yourself, “Where can I block off 20 minutes each day for silence/reflection?” No distractions. Be with yourself, journal about your thoughts, notice and watch as your life transforms in the coming weeks. Your 20-minute time block might shift from one day to the next, but the key is to do it every day. 

When you intentionally put your focus on growth, challenging yourself to communicate, share and reflect, opportunities will continually present themselves, allowing not only for your growth, but for everyone around you, and your bottom line.

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! Gain clarity on what’s preventing your growth, along with what will inspire it – get your Gearing for Greatness session Today: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

Have you ever found yourself reading the comments section for a restaurant you found on Yelp (or another similar application) and thought to yourself, “How is this place even in business?” Or, “Wow, I’ve got to try this place!”

 

While restaurant owners reap many benefits from Yelp, few cash in on one of the most valuable elements of these online tools. Coincidentally, it’s the same element most of us avoid regardless of success, position, industry, or experience.

 

Hungry for authentic Greek food in Baltimore, I grabbed my phone and did a quick search. It a matter of moments, I saw which ones were highly rated, read through a few comments, and then made my choice.

 

After thoroughly enjoying the food, I found myself chatting it up with the owner, who is thinking about opening another location in DC. During our conversation, I learned about his love/hate relationship with Yelp and the painstaking process they continue to go through as they work toward simplifying their menu and ordering process.   

 

“It’s clear to me what you like about Yelp,” I said, “It’s actually what got me here today! Help me understand what you dislike about it so much.”

 

“The negative comments,” he said. “You can’t please everyone, and some people like to take their bad day out on you there.”

 

Considering his interest in strengthening his current processes before expanding to the DC market, I wondered if perhaps the criticisms were actually the most valuable aspect of Yelp for his business.

 

“Most people will not come in here and tell you what they don’t like,” I suggested, and he agreed. “Instead, they’ll tell everyone they know about their bad experience, and silently destroy your reputation without you even having a chance to make improvements. Through Yelp, you get an insiders view of what’s working well, and what needs improving.” 

 

As he slowly nodded his head up and down, I wondered out loud, “Has anyone complained about the confusion of your ordering process?”

 

“Yes, and it doesn’t make any sense—it’s simple. You come in, order, and take your seat. We bring the food to you,” he said.

 

Nervously, I said, “Really, because I find it confusing,” and began explaining why. Listening intently, he kept nodding, almost as if the comments on Yelp were starting to make sense.

 

With a renewed perspective of the criticisms, the negative comments are now serving as the foundation for his growth, rather than the bane of his existence. Actually, that’s the purpose of all criticism—Growth, though some people are clueless when it comes to word choice and tone of voice when offering their critique. 

 

No matter your position, title, or business, it’s far more enjoyable to read or listen to positive feedback then it is to carefully consider criticism and make adjustments based on your goals. Improvement (growth!) requires a different/better approach, which we discover by listening and adjusting to critique.

 

This week, consider pausing and asking more questions when you feel yourself getting defensive. Additionally, you may consider asking a colleague, boss, or even a close friend to help you see where you may be getting in your own way. When they offer ideas, repeat them back to make sure you understood them correctly, and then thank them. Keep doing this, and watch as your career, company, and reputation take off.

 

Beware: as you do this, others will be inspired by your courage, and begin the process themselves. As you step into your greatness, so will they!

 

Here’s to your greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Gain clarity on what’s preventing your growth, along with what will inspire it – get your Gearing for Greatness session Today: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

 

During this fun and lively interview, Lisa Rosenthal shares the story that lead to her passion for building a powerful brand and company culture. Considering the turbulent nature of the government contracting industry, I was deeply interested in learning how Mayvin has successfully reached 90% employee retention, particularly considering the all-too-common threat of poaching. Lisa shared her secret strategies for driving retention through innovation, engagement, and collaboration. Listen in!

 

About Lisa Rosenthal: she is the Chief Executive Officer and co-founder of The Mayvin Consulting Group, a dynamic women-owned small business. In less than 4 years, her team doubled the firm’s revenues annually making the Inc 5000 list of fastest growing firms 3 years in a row.  Their two-fold specialty in supporting both Program Management and Mission Support projects for the Department of Homeland Security and Department of Defense has resulted in revenues exceeding $15M/year. Lisa also sits on the Board of Directors for the American University/Entrepreneurship Council, My Sister’s Place, and QSMI, as well as several committees throughout DoD and the local Washington, D.C. community. To learn more about Lisa, click here.

 

Interested in learning more about Mayvin? Check them out here.  

 

Enjoy!

 

Lisa, a special thank you for the joy of interviewing you! I had a lot of fun, and I’m grateful to your dedication to serving greatness—Thank you!  

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Through the power of listening and summarizing situations, Misti has an uncanny way of motivating not just you but your whole team!” – Susan Malone, Executive Director at Wide Angle Youth Media

 

Whether you invest your time, energy and capital in raising cows, pigs, and chickens, or in entrepreneurial ideas, advancing your mission, strengthening your team, or developing your career, it seems the process for healthy and sustainable growth is the same.

 

A few weeks ago, the Washington Business Journal hosted Steve Case, co-founder of America Online (AOL) and current Chairman/CEO of Revolution LLC, an investment firm that is funneling cash into businesses, people, and ideas that are changing the world.

 

“Innovation,” Case said, “isn’t happening only in Silicon Valley—it’s happening all around the country, and Revolution LLC is looking for the visionaries, ideas and communities to invest in.”

 

Curious, I asked Mr. Case, “What are some of the characteristics you look for in a community where innovation is likely to happen?”

 

“Communities in which collaboration is high. We tend to see this more often in areas that have come through difficulty—Detroit and New Orleans are great examples,” Case said, and went on to describe the start up community in New Orleans.

 

“In New Orleans, one business might be doing well, and have good reason to celebrate, but they don’t see it that way. The success of each start up in the community is critical to the success of the whole,” Case said. Turns out, the devastation of Hurricane Katrina not only strengthened the bond of the community members, but it created the perfect environment for innovation and growth.

 

Curious about the critical nature of disruption for growth, I grabbed my copy of The Third Wave and approached Mr. Case for his signature. While signing it, I asked him, “Do you think it’s the difficulty of the disruption in these communities that creates ripe environments for innovation?”

 

“Yes, absolutely,” Case responded, which took me back my recent tour of Polyface Farms in Shenandoah Valley, Virginia. During the tour, Joel Salatin, the farmer in charge of this revolutionary farm, talked about the importance of disrupting his animals and the land continuously in order to keep them healthy and vibrant.

 

“Disruption is critical to growth,” Salatin said as he described his system for rotating his animals in a specific pattern. In essence, he seeks to significantly disrupt the grass by allowing the cows, chickens, geese, and turkeys to pick away at it until there is very little grass left. Meanwhile, by consistently moving his animals, he keeps them healthy and growing.

 

Recognizing that, when given a choice, the vast majority of us seek comfort over discomfort, the known over the mysterious, permission over risk-taking, and

approval over rejection or elimination, how can we ensure continual growth/advancement? The answer lies in intentionality. By intentionally—

 

--Exposing yourself to different industries (and the people in them),

--Developing new friendships,

--Taking on a project you know little about, 

--Learning new skills (biking, swimming, programming, public speaking, etc), and

--Opening yourself up to noticing/experiencing the full range of emotions that surface, and then dissolve—

 

You effectively train yourself in discomfort, the critical element for growth, advancement, and innovation in your industry, on your team, and in your career.

 

The idea behind this concept is the reason I love to swim in the rain. Since I’m already wet, I enjoy the feeling of each drop (even if it’s cold) as it hits my skin. Just as rain is no big deal when you’re already wet, experiencing discomfort when you first start learning a new industry isn’t as daunting when you’ve continuously exposed yourself to new and different people and experiences along the way.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

 

—Your work/career

—Leading your team

—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Misti’s approach and directness are what make her exceedingly valuable. She cut through the noise and got right to the heart of what’s necessary for growth.” –Alvin Katz, CPA Chair/Co-Founder, Katz/Abosch.

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” —Theodore Roosevelt

 

Your decision is clear—you’re going make your imprint in your industry. You work hard, do your research, and put yourself out there. Feeling great, you think, “I’ve got this!” Then, you watch as someone else brilliantly outshines you, and think, “I could never be that good, so why bother.” Deflated, you begin questioning your goals, and start wondering if you should try a different route to success.

 

Has this happened to you? It happens to me nearly every time I watch someone deliver (what looks like) a flawless speech. It doesn’t matter whether I’m watching them on YouTube, in a small gathering, or on a giant stage. In fact, it doesn’t even matter if they speak on a totally different topic.

 

Watching his ridiculously powerful stage presence, I found it difficult to stop analyzing the way he told his stories long enough to even appreciate how Dan Barber fell in love with a fish. Fortunately, I caught myself and was able to appreciate both his content and soak up his story-telling brilliance.   

 

It’s a love-hate relationship I have with talented speakers. I love their talent, passion, and dedication to the craft, but I also hate dealing with the inner monologue they prompt. Before I get a chance to appreciate their perspective, my internal monologue starts convincing me…

 

"They’re already doing everything you want to do—and so much better—so what’s the point? Quit now. Go find something to focus on, where you can be the best." Of course, that doesn’t exist, and fortunately there will always be someone whose brilliance can help us develop and improve.

 

Seriously though, why should I bother stirring up enthusiasm, productivity, and provoking greatness… across generations, when Eric Chester and Jason Dorsey are kicking some major butt out there? Seriously, their dedication, commitment, passion, and performance are top-notch. Hire them, and your audience will walk away not only more knowledgeable, but motivated.  

 

Here are a few other remarkable speakers who have prompted my “Why bother” monologue: Dr. Nido Qubein, Brené Brown, Seth Godin, Mark Scharenbroich, Lou Heckler. Of course, it’s not like we pick mediocre people to compare ourselves to—No, we chose award-winning superstars who consistently and courageously work at their craft.

 

Ready to break free of the debilitating effect of such paralyzing comparisons, the following five steps aid greatly in remaining focused on moving your own ball forward:   

1. Notice and Acknowledge your thoughts. Please, do yourself a favor and avoid trying to hide, fade, or fix them. What we resist, persists. Simply begin to notice what you’re telling yourself.
2. Get Curious. With the curiosity of a 5-year-old that has to know why, why, why, become curious about the nature of the conversation going on inside your head.
3. Defuse your storyline. Rather than allow yourself to get caught up in self-judgment, consider literally saying to yourself, “Isn’t that interesting. I wonder where that thought comes from.” This allows you to remove the "good/bad, right/wrong" of the stories you're telling yourself.
4. Remember where you started (or, are starting) and keep perspective on YOUR growth. Or, as Brene Brown suggested, “Stay in your own lane,” when she shared about her competitive nature in swimming.
5. Act anyway. Keep practicing, keep learning, and keep sharing your passions, especially when that voice creeps in. Otherwise, we risk the possibility of allowing our fears to ruin our dreams.

 

Repeat these steps over and over again as you bare silent witness to the magic of the process. And, remember: it's never about being the best, but giving your best every single day. As don Miguel Ruiz says, "Your best is different every day." Honor YOUR journey, listen, be curious, and keep moving your ball forward.

 

"To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself."

 

― Thich Nhat Hanh

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

 

—Your work/career

—Leading your team

—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Working with Misti Burmeister will be one of the best decisions you have ever made as a leader. She helped me integrate new behaviors and thought processes to bolster my overall leadership presence.” –Kevin Frick, Professor and Dean, Johns Hopkins Carey School of Business

 

With a touch of desperation and a tone of sincerity, she took the microphone during the Q&A section of my speech, and asked, “How do I get the very best human resource leaders to put their time and energy into helping me become one of the best?”

 

Her question, along with the desperation, felt incredibly familiar to me, as I remembered back to the days I pleaded with several talented speakers and messaging experts to help me find and share my message. In fact, I remember snapping a photo of this quote—

 

“Give me a place to stand, and I will change the world.”

 

—and sending it to Dawn, a gifted speaker and my former coach, secretly hoping she would tell me exactly what I believe in and how to package it so that I would gain traction in my career. 

 

“I feel like a Lamborghini… inches off the ground. Help me get my wheels to touch the pavement, and I’ll take off,” I’d say, hoping that someone would take pity on me and devote their time and resources to providing me with the exact opportunities and experiences I needed to become one of the best.

 

Too afraid to take any chances on myself, I secretly hoped they would step up to the plate and do it for me. Of course, it doesn’t work that way, but I couldn’t see the truth back then. I couldn’t see that I had to be the one to give myself a place to stand, nor did I understand that standing in that place would change the world—my world—the only world I can ever change. 

 

Asking others to give you a place to stand in the world is akin to asking a fitness trainer to burn calories for you, which would be awesome and ridiculously profitable if it were possible. It’s not. They can—and the best trainers do—create custom exercise programs, and hold their clients accountable to their goals. But—they cannot do the work for you. 

 

When you invest (time, energy, and money) in the results you care about (being one of the most valuable human resource professionals in the market, as an example), you send a clear signal to the Universe (and everyone around you) that you are committed to doing whatever is necessary to reach success. Please note: there are three critical pieces at play here—time, energy, and money/resources.

 

While you can pay a trainer (and even a leadership coach) thousands of dollars to create the plan, and hold you accountable to it, you cannot pay them to feel the frustration or the pain for you. You get to be the one to experience fear, frustration, and the freedom that comes when you get to the other side of it. Showing up and putting yourself through the workout is critical to crafting your best body, and career.

 

Only you can lower yourself to the ground, and you do this by picking yourself—to get curious about, take risks on, to invest in, and to develop. When you decide to pick yourself, you’ll find a way to get the training you need, to introduce yourself to the people you need to meet, and to take on that project you know will get you the experience and exposure you need to fuel your career.

 

Don’t waste another minute waiting for someone else to pick you and decide on the direction of your career, or of your ability to contribute to your community. Start taking risks on yourself—invest time, money, and energy in strengthening key relationships, advancing skills, gaining experiences, and sharing every bit of what you learn along the way. Get involved in projects you care about. Don’t know what projects you care about? Listen intently for the people/experiences that intrigue you—then, invest.

 

Avoid worrying about perfection, and simply do the best you can with the information and skills you have. You will never have all the right training, nor will you ever get it exactly right. That’s okay. The feeling of progress far outweighs the pain of postponing your desire to advance.

 

You already have everything you need to do the work that matters to you—put yourself in the game, experience the difficulty of getting knocked down, along with the thrill of scoring. Recognize that neither of those two experiences (getting knocked down or scoring) is better than the other—they’re both simply giving you feedback.

 

Follow Pema Chodran’s advice and start where you are, in this moment, not where you think you should be. There is never a better place or time to start picking yourself then where you are right now. Trust me, I started at rock bottom—void of opportunity and suffering greatly from anxiety and fear of worthlessness.

 

There wasn’t enough training on this planet—or a good enough teacher—to rid me of my fears. My saving grace: picking myself. Investing nearly every bit of energy, money and time I had in getting the training I needed, building relationships, and finding opportunities to share my talents have put the right balls in motion to get my wheels to touch the pavement. And, while it feels great in this moment, I know that the investment is never done.

 

There is no, “there, I did it.” Well, maybe there is, but it must be followed up with, “Next!” Many years ago, Edie, a mentor, irritated me with her constant, “Next!” I wanted to take my time celebrating, meanwhile the world moved on, and I wound up in the fetal position praying for my life.

 

So, yes, celebrate your successes, and then ask yourself what’s needed to continue evolving your spirit, relationships, and career. Keep putting forth the time, energy, and resources necessary for advancing your own mind, body, spirit, and successes—no one else can do it for you.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

 

—Your work/career

—Leading your team

—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Through the power of listening and summarizing situations, Misti has an uncanny way of motivating not just you but your whole team!” – Susan Malone, Executive Director at Wide Angle Youth Media

 

 

 

 

Last week, I took a trip out to Spooks, Virginia. It’s located in Shenandoah Valley, and man is it beautiful there! It also happens to be where Polyface Farms is located.

 

For those of you who follow the sustainable farming movement, or watched Food Inc—a documentary on sustainable solutions to food production—you might remember Joel Salatin. He’s the man behind Polyface Farms, and one heck of a passionate believer in creating the best possible system for both the environment and his livestock.

 

Cozying up on bails of hay thrown on top of a flat bed trailer, which was pulled by a big tractor, we took our tour of the farm. A few times throughout the tour, they stopped the tractors and Joel answer questions as he explained his system for rotating animals. As we weaved around his property, you could not help but be taken in by the beauty of the lush green pastures and rolling hills.

 

On our second stop, Joel explained how he keeps his soil and grass healthy, along with ensuring his animals get proper nourishment. Essentially, they rotate various animals in a specific sequence on the same field. If they aren’t able to get enough animals through the fields in time before the grass becomes too mature, they cut it and save the clippings as feed for the winter months.

 

“The pasture and the animals need the disruption (continuous grazing/clipping and movement) to remain healthy,” he said, “the disturbance is what allows for healthy growth.”

 

His words captivated me, particularly as I started thinking about the importance of disruption in all areas of life. Whether we’re talking about moving animals out of their comfort zone, disrupting the fields with grazing/cutting, or having difficult conversations, we need disruption to create the fertile ground for growth.

 

While Joel was initially talking about his farming practices, he was really hitting on a much bigger idea that is critical for all growth. Whether we’re talking about the bottom line, innovation, career growth, or professional advancement, disruption, disturbance, or discomfort are critical elements of the process.

 

By getting attached to current systems, skills, and colleagues, we might be missing out on tremendous opportunities for growth. To avoid such stagnation, consider intentionally disrupting your own status quo. You can do this by:

 

—Advancing your skillsets continuously

—Rotating the venues in which you spend time networking/building relationships

—Address elephants as they surface and open the floor for difficult conversations

—Test out new ideas continuously, with the expectation that they might fail.

 

There is no success without failure—train yourself and your team to appreciate failure and disruption as you move toward growth and advancement. Keep rotating, learning, and disrupting your comfort zone—in time your pastures (team, career, balance statement) will be the same kind of luscious green of Joel Salatin’s farm. 

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

 

—Your work/career

—Leading your team

—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Working with Misti Burmeister will be one of the best decisions you have ever made as a leader. She helped me integrate new behaviors and thought processes to bolster my overall leadership presence.” –Kevin Frick, Professor and Dean, Johns Hopkins Carey School of Business

 

 

 

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
― Jim Rohn

While I have never been a fan of the idea that we are the sum total of our five closest friends, I do appreciate the awareness that such a statement creates. The idea begs a couple of important questions—

1—What am I learning from the actions (or inactions) of those around me?
2—How are my actions (or inactions) instructing others?

Often, without our even realizing it, those around us are taking cues from us about how to behave, what to say, and even whether or not to believe in themselves. If you’re in a leadership role, the chances of others imitating you are 10x’s stronger—no pressure! It’s a ridiculous amount of responsibility, yet the potential for inspiration and personal growth are insanely powerful when we accept it.

The truth inherent in this reality hit me between the eyes when my friend Aisha shared a bit about her experience of being stationed in Kentucky after growing up in Queens, New York. In Queens, she told her jokes with swagger and fun. In Kentucky, she found herself editing her stories and tiptoeing around her natural style as she struggled to fit in.

While Aisha’s style, dreadlocks and music preferences were a perfect fit in Queens, Kentucky hardly boasted the kind of cultural diversity she was accustomed to. With the majority of her colleagues sporting cowboy boots and listening to country music, Aisha found herself struggling to tell her jokes, and simply be herself.

Desperate to figure it out, she started watching a fellow mocha-skinned officer who was well respected despite the fact that he drove around base in his Lexus, with spinning rims, and blaring 2Pac. Wanting that same level of freedom, Aisha asked him, “How do I do this?”

“You’re the one making a big deal of your skin—they don’t care. Tell your jokes, just like you’d tell them to me,” he said, giving Aisha permission to trust in (and be) herself.

“They did laugh, Misti,” Aisha told me, “and I realized that all I needed to do was be me.”

The simple act of confidently expressing himself inspired Aisha to not only ask for guidance, but also embrace her natural style, positively shifting her experience of Kentucky and every other place she was stationed afterward.

Regardless of whether we’re talking about close friends, or strangers we watch from a distance at the grocery store, this type of influence is happening constantly. Rather than focus on your five closest friends, consider noticing the actions that inspire you to do more, dream more, and become more… of who you really are.

Yes—notice the liars, cowards, and addicts of the world, and then chose courage, truth, and peace of mind without wasting a second in judgment. Also, notice the brave, open-minded, seekers, and allow them to open your heart and embrace the struggle to the journey to full self-acceptance.

Your actions (inactions) are silently giving others permission to—be themselves, take risks, believe in themselves, ignore difficulty, pretend to be someone they’re not, listen, talk over the top of others, set goals, help others reach their goals… the list goes on and on. What’s on your list?

Awareness is key. Behavior shifts naturally as awareness sharpens. Tune in and ask yourself, “What are my actions giving others permission to do, be, and become?” Likewise, “Whose courage (or cowardice) am I allowing to influence my beliefs and behaviors?” The simple act of noticing is the key to getting—and inspiring—the results that matter to you.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

—Your work/career
—Leading your team
—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

“Misti’s approach and directness are what make her exceedingly valuable. She cut through the noise and got right to the heart of pushing me to focus and keep my eye on the ball.” –Alvin Katz, Co-Founder, Katz/Abosch

 

During the Q&A session of a panel discussion I was a part of recently, a woman stood up and asked, “Is it okay to cry at work?”

 

Previous to that moment, I would have said, “Of course, it’s okay to cry.” But I held my tongue because of the words I’d heard Freeman Hrabowski, President of UMBC, say during a speech just a few months before.

 

“We teach our female students not to cry at work,” he said.

 

At the time, I remember thinking, “You’re a guy—what do you know about women and emotions?” I found myself irritated with the fact a man of great influence was actively teaching women to hold back their emotions.

 

Clearly, he didn’t get it. Or, did he? Am I blind to something that he, along with several prominent women in history, sees?

 

Waiting for my panel-mates to share their own version of, “I’m a crier,” my mind went back to a few years ago when I listened to a speaker share about his mothers approach to emotions. “I watched her,” he said, “in the heat of difficult business conversations. She held her emotions until we got behind closed doors and then she’d let it out. ‘Don’t let them see you sweat,’ she’d say.”

 

Back then, the idea of hiding your emotions felt foreign and wrong to me. In fact, it felt wrong until the moment the woman in the audience asked the question. Imagining what it might be like to be on the receiving end of her emotional release, it occurred to me that the impact could easily become overwhelming and exhausting. 

 

Depending on the capacity of the person receiving her emotion, it could also be no big deal. But, considering how few people know how to handle even the smallest amount of emotion, releasing the pressure valve on your boss, employees, or those looking to you for leadership is probably not the best option.

 

Let’s be honest, most of us want to believe that the person leading us is strong, can handle the pressure, and will communicate their needs. In the same vein, most leaders want to be able to hand off a project, trusting their employees will give their best and ask for the help when needed.  

 

Large amounts of emotion on either side consume energy and take time to process regardless of whether you’re the boss or the employee. When it comes to progress (and profitability) in business, reducing the expense of difficult emotions makes sense.

 

Of course, this conversation about tears at the office would be incomplete without addressing the tremendous benefits vulnerability brings to high performing individuals and teams. In fact, Brene Brown travels the world teaching on this very topic, leading companies and teams to breakthroughs in innovation, collaboration, and profitability.

 

While there’s no question that difficult emotions have a place at work, the critical questions to consider before releasing are;

 

—Do I respect and trust them?

—Do they trust and respect me?

 

If there is trust and respect in the relationship, you probably have a sense of the impact your emotional release will have on them. While their ability (or inability) to handle emotions are not your responsibility, recognizing your potential impact may give you just the nudge you need to process in a safe environment first.  Giving yourself the resources (time with a trusted friend, advisor, or therapist) necessary to process emotions could mean the difference between destroying opportunities and distinguishing yourself as worthy of trust.

 

The following are three great exercises to strengthen your ability to distinguish the most effective use of your emotions in the moment:

 

1. Reflect and Recharge. Let’s face it, irritation, frustration, and even anger are a natural part of being alive, though few of us give ourselves the time and support we need to understand and grow from these emotions. Set aside fifteen minutes every day to reflect. The key here is to do it every
2. Use Difficulty. When someone says or does something that triggers emotion (anger, fear, sadness, frustration, etc), pause, focus on your breath, and stay present. Recognize where your discomfort is really coming from—the stories you tell yourself, take mental note, and then use your reflection time to go over your stories. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.
3. Wiggle Your Toes. My comedic yogi friend, Kelly Harman, suggests that if you feel like you are going to cry, wiggle your toes really hard. Your brain for some reason, cannot process crying and toe wiggling together and it will help keep you from crying.

 

With such divergent opinions on this topic, it’s easy to jump to criticism, rather than appreciate the gift of being human—we make up stories. Rather than spend time criticizing, consider giving yourself the time and space necessary to understand and relate to your own needs.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

Do you remember when you were a kid and really wanted a bowl of delicious ice cream for desert? Yes, a bowl. Several scoops, with gobs of toppings. And, you wanted it as your main course, not just desert.

 

But, you knew your parents wouldn’t go for that, so you pushed your carrots around, ate your potatoes, and had a few bites of protein before you proclaimed yourself as ready for that mint chocolate chip yummy goodness.

 

“You need to eat a few more bites of your carrots and chicken, and then we can talk desert,” your parents would say. (For the record, my parents never had to use this technique on any of us… we ate everything, and always had extra room for desert, so you have to forgive me if I don’t get this game exactly right.)

 

Cutting your chicken into the tiniest pieces, you took a few extra bites, showed your progress, as you prepared your pallet for that vanilla bean delicious goodness.

 

“You can eat a few more of those carrots,” your dad would say, “And then you can have your cookies n’ cream with a little extra chocolate sauce.”

 

“Chocolate sauce?” you thought in yummy anticipation, before you swallowed three carrots practically whole. But, hey, they were off your plate, and finally you got your ice cream. Excitement rippled through you, and a giant smile strung across your face, as you instructed your mom, “A little more chocolate topping, please.”

 

All that anticipation made the chocolate sweeter and the ice cream creamier. So delicious! It was worth the torture of getting through your broccoli and spinach. The system worked, and you wound up eating balanced meals.

 

Thank you, mom and dad!

 

Now, skip forward a couple of decades. Not only is ice cream plentiful and well within reach, but emails, text messages, and additional projects keep coming to you in droves. You want to feel that sense of accomplishment of finishing, but for some reason you can’t seem to focus.

 

It’s not that you don’t have the time. You do. In fact, you’ve sat in front of your computer, with every intention of completing the project, but somehow a couple of hours go by and you walk away empty handed, angry at yourself for not finishing.

 

Your anger and irritation with yourself leads you to avoiding the very project you want very much to complete. You want that feeling that comes from finishing, yet you’re tired of dealing with the self-beatings for not getting it done. At this point you refuse to even sit down and work on the project… leading you to calling yourself a terrible procrastinator.

 

You are not a terrible procrastinator. In fact, procrastination is not your problem in the least. Your real problem is lack of parentals to make you wait for your ice cream.

 

I mean, let’s be real. Just as ice cream dances on your taste buds, emails, texts, and special requests push at your “I’m needed, special, important” buttons. Ice cream tastes good, and affirmations feel good. And, staying focused (carrots and protein) are necessary to a healthy mind, body, and spirit.

 

So, rather than beating yourself up for being a procrastinator, call your mom.

 

No, I’m kidding. Well, kinda. You’re mom may very well have some ideas to help you stay focused. Here are a few I’ve uncovered…

 

• Turn off automatic send/receive on your email.
• Silence your phone.
• Discover your prop of silence.

 

One executive told me about the sheer number of interruptions he dealt with every day in the office. In order to address important issues in a timely manor, he shared his frustration with his team, and then asked them not to interrupt him when he had his Orioles cap on. “If it’s truly an emergency, interrupt me,” he said.

 

Interestingly, his team has almost never had to disturb his focused time because ultimately very, very little of what distracts us is truly an emergency. Figure out what you need to put in place to ensure emergencies are handled appropriately, and then focus.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

Joel Salatin is a disruptor, entrepreneur, revolutionary farmer, and one heck of a leader. His work through Polyface Inc. (“The Farm of Many Faces”) has been featured in SMITHSONIAN MAGAZINE, NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC, GOURMET and countless other radio, television and print media. Profiled on the Lives of the 21st Century series with Peter Jennings on ABC World News, his after-broadcast chat room fielded more hits than any other segment to date. It achieved iconic status as the grass farm featured in the NEW YORK TIMES bestseller OMNIVORE’S DILEMMA by food writer guru Michael Pollan and the award-winning film documentary, FOOD INC.

 

Recently, I had a chance to visit the farm and was blown away by Joel’s perspective on innovation. “Disruption is critical for growth,” Joel said, as he explained his systematic approach for rotating his animals on the farm. Beyond farming, he talked about the importance of having difficult conversations and learning through disagreement.

 

As you can imagine, I had SO many questions! I joyful the moment I got an immediate response from Joel, agreeing to let me interview him for this podcast.

 

Not only will you learn a bit about farming and the industry in general, but you’ll walk away with tactical strategies for intentionally prompting innovation/growth in your career, on your team, and within your organization.

 

Enjoy!

 

Joel, a special thank you for generously sharing your time and your stories with our listeners—your dedication to greatness is incredible, and I’m grateful to know you!  

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

 

—Your work/career

—Leading your team

—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

 

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

 

“Through the power of listening and summarizing situations, Misti has an uncanny way of motivating not just you but your whole team!” – Susan Malone, Executive Director at Wide Angle Youth Media

 

"The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off." —Gloria Steinem

Freedom is delicious—intoxicating, really. It tastes like ice cream, and feels like abs of steel. It sounds like seagulls, crashing waves, laughter… adventure, and looks like an overflowing bank account. It sounds like generous and peaceful conversations with family and colleagues, and it feels like a million kindhearted hugs.

Who wouldn’t want that kind of freedom? Freedom to be who you are unapologetically, to buy what you want, to travel where you want without concern for a budget, to do work that’s meaningful to you, and to take all the time you want to think, process, and recharge as needed.

Yes, freedom is yummy. And, such a delightful taste is made possible by the combination of specific ingredients… not all of which taste good in isolation.

If freedom is one side of the coin, responsibility is the other. Responsibility for a specific result puts us on the hook, and leaves us vulnerable to the possibility of failure. It’s easier to avoid responsibility, and then complain that we don’t get to do work that’s important to our soul. It’s easy to complain about politics, and it’s a whole other thing to get involved in making a difference.

—We want to feel peaceful, but then we fail to include peace-inducing activities in our everyday lives. (Meditation, yoga, laughter, prayer, and chanting, just to name a few.)
—We want a President who embodies the values this great nation was built upon, but then we fail to find a way to get involved. (Bashing the system or people who are stepping up to the plate is hardly a way to build toward a political infrastructure that holds our values.)
—We want to buy food that has been grown/raised with a focus on nurturing our bodies and strengthening our environment, yet don’t want to go out of our way (or spend more) to get it, or to strengthen the people who are producing it.
—We want to support the people who are doing work we believe in, but we avoid making promises when it comes to raising funds or awareness.
—We want them to like us, but then we fail to uncover the many reasons to like them.
—We want our family to accept and appreciate us for who we are, but then we hold tightly to our negative opinions of their decisions and actions.
—We want a healthy body, yet we fail to discover the motivating factors for our eating and exercise decisions.
—We want to be wealthy, though many of us don’t even know what that means, or what we’d do with the money. In fact, few of us have taken the time to understand our relationship with/story around money.
—We want our employees to bring their A game consistently, to work hard, and demonstrate enthusiasm, but then we rest on our laurels when it comes to sharing an inspiring vision, learning about the hopes, dreams, and future aspirations of our team, and finding ways to help them grow.

"For to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others." —Nelson Mandela

Freedom is free, so long as we step up and own responsibility for the results that matter to our soul. Freedom will always be an inside-out game. The greater the responsibility we take for connecting to our own joy, the freer we are to see and seize the opportunities that present themselves, and create freedom in our lives.

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

• Your work/career
• Leading your team
• Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

“Working with Misti Burmeister will be one of the best decisions you have ever made as a leader. She helped me integrate new behaviors and thought processes to bolster my overall leadership presence.” –Kevin Frick, Professor and Dean, Johns Hopkins Carey School of Business

 

Not in my wildest dreams could I have ever imagined that a young man, in a hoodie, talking hoodlum to his buddies through his wrist phone at a local coffee shop, could ever turn me into a hustler for his business.

 

But—it happened, and here’s how…

 

With 17% battery, he squeezed in right beside me at the tall table facing the lake at a local coffee shop, and plugged in his computer. His hoody covered most of his head, though his headphones, resting on his cheekbones, poked out, and left me wondering what project he was working on.

 

Watching him bring his wrist up to his mouth, I listened as he rattled off a few sentences before refocusing on his computer. “Nah bro, not now…” he said in a deep tone with a bit of inner city youth.

 

Curious, I asked, “What project are you working on?”

 

“I’m starting a tee shirt business,” he said, “I’m going to be taking people’s vacation pics and printing them on a shirt.”

 

“Very cool. Do you have a website I can check out?”

 

“No, I just came up with the idea this morning… Wouldn’t you want a shirt with a favorite picture from your recent vacation on it?” He asked.

 

“That’s not really my thing, but I’m sure plenty of people would want that.”

 

“Really, you wouldn’t want this?” he asked, as he pointed to the screen and showed me a recent picture he took of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.

 

“I’m getting that printed on a shirt for my mom,” he continued.

 

“That’s cool!”

 

“What do you do?” he asked.

 

“I work with executives…”

 

“—I’m an executive,” he cut me off, “Maybe I can use your help.”

 

You can imagine the story my mind created about this perfectly nice young man, wearing a hoodie, talking hoodlum to his buddies through his smart watch, and making a tee shirt for his mom in a coffee shop.

 

“You have a team of people helping you with your new tee shirt business?” I asked.

 

“Nah, that’s a new thing. Carry Out Menu is my main focus right now.”

 

Turns out, Carry Out Menu is a business that delivers a vast array of restaurant foods to local businesses, and he just happened to drop off an order to a financial services business that I’ve worked with.

 

I was both inspired and embarrassed at the same time.

 

He was an executive, and as it turned out, he had a great deal more to teach me than I could have ever imagined. Fortunately, he couldn’t hear my initial thoughts, and I had a chance to learn from this incredibly authentic, humble executive.

 

Deeply curious, I leaned in as he talked about his competitors, their target market, and how a couple of them had recently been purchased for millions. In the same chill demeanor he spoke about his new tee shirt business, he told me about the six other guys hustling right alongside him at Carry Out Menu.

 

Beyond an executive, I wondered if he was also a reader.

 

“Certain books, yes,” he responded as he pulled up The Laws of Success by Napoleon Hill on his iPhone, where he does most of his reading.

 

“Well, I was going to give you a hard copy of my book, but maybe you’d prefer an e-copy for your phone?” I asked, and he accepted.

 

“How much is it?” he asked.

 

“It’s my pleasure to gift you with this copy,” I said.

 

Pulling out some cash, he asked, “Twenty? Twenty-five?”

 

“Not for an ecopy. You can get it cheaper on Amazon. But, please… let this be a gift from me,” I said, as I pushed his money back toward him.

 

“I’ll just stick the money in your backpack then,” he said, and proceeded to look for a convenient place to stuff it in.

 

“Why won’t you accept my gift?”

 

“Do you sell these books?” he asked.

 

“Yes, I do,” I said, suddenly awkwardly shy about that fact.

 

“I want to buy it, then.”

 

There was no reasoning with that logic. Not only was he right, but he was silently teaching me again. I stood there dumbfounded, speechless (can you imagine? That, my friends, is rare).

 

“Do you have a business card?” I asked, knowing my lessons with this wonderful young man were just beginning.

 

“Yes, they’re in my car.”

 

Along with three business cards, he handed me a dozen or so booklets, with several hundred restaurants that Carry Out Menu partners with in order to ensure local businesses have options when deciding where to order food for their next meeting.  

 

Not only did he inspire me, he left me wanting to find a way to help his business succeed.

 

The very next day, I handed one of the booklets to John, a friend and the manager of a local business. “I met one of the executives at this company yesterday,” I said to John, “He is a hustler and awesome. Order from them for your next meeting.”

 

Who would have thought that a young man, in a hoodie, starting a new tee shirt company would wind up getting me to keep his booklets on my passenger seat, as I found the perfect business owners to help him grow his business? You can’t pay for that kind of marketing, nor can you manufacture it!

 

Whether you’re selling a product, a service, or a vision to your team, imagine the kind of raving fans (and hustlers) you can create by genuinely looking for ways to help them succeed first. Watch what happens as you shift your focus from getting others to do more for you, onto hustling to help them reach their goals, meet their heroes, and continue advancing their skills.    

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

After sharing the stage with Erin Moran just a few weeks ago up in New York, I had to interview her. While the innovative ideas and practices of the Union Square Hospitality Group (USHG) are certainly turning heads in the restaurant industry, it was Erin’s passion and energy that captured my attention.

Throughout this interview, Erin shares about the experiences that prompted her into this line of work, the #1 key to tapping into human potential (This, from nearly two decades in the human potential industry), and the current success rate of USHG’s “No tipping” practice.

Listen in!

Erin, a special thank you for generously sharing your time and your stories with our listeners—your dedication to greatness is incredible, and I’m grateful to know you!

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! Ready to reconnect to the excitement of—

—Your work/career
—Leading your team
—Growing your bottom line, along with your people?

Grab your 40 minute Gearing for Greatness session with Misti today—http://mistiburmeister.com/GearingForGreatness

“Through the power of listening and summarizing situations, Misti has an uncanny way of motivating not just you but your whole team!” – Susan Malone, Executive Director at Wide Angle Youth Media

 

In preparation for my interview with Anese Cavanaugh, I reviewed her website and watched this speech she gave at the Inc. Women’s Summit. Her message resonated with the mission of the Provoking Your Greatness podcast, and I was excited for this interview.

 

Our forty minutes together felt more like catching up with a good friend than interviewing an expert, author, and successful businesswoman. With that kind of chemistry, I knew we had to work together on a project.

 

A few weeks after the interview, we jumped on a Skype call to record a conversation about love, vulnerability, and leadership. For nearly an hour, we tossed ideas back and forth, got vulnerable, and shared strategies we use (and teach) for loving your work and your team. While the conversation was valuable and fun, the most valuable part for me came after we shut off the recording.

 

Just before we hung up, I asked Anese, “If you hear of anyone looking for a speaker, would you put my name in the hat?” As an expert receiving requests to speak, she could suggest me for events requiring more than one speaker.

 

Within seconds, she pasted a link to a website where a couple dozen business conferences are listed, and suggested I reach out and submit myself as a speaker for the various events. Not realizing why, I felt of twinge of irritation and caught myself thinking, “If I’m a good enough speaker, I shouldn’t need to submit myself—they should come to me.”

 

I asked, “How did you get the opportunity to speak at the Inc. conference,” fully expecting to hear some form of, “Word of mouth.”

 

“Some were by referral, but many of them were by submitting myself and putting myself out there to speak at their venues. One venue I submitted to for two years before I got the opportunity,” she said, as if such an activity was normal for talented speakers. “Sometimes when I submitted my name for a conference,” she continued, “I’d get an email encouraging me to keep submitting. Other times—radio silence. So, I kept submitting. ”

 

“Keep submitting? I don’t want to submit at all, much less keep submitting,” I thought, not understanding why I was irritated. 

 

Before I could figure out what all my agitation was about, Anese added, “And while it seemed like they were ignoring me, or didn’t want me, it turned out they were very good people, and well intended, just busy and sometimes a bit disorganized.”

 

While I wasn’t aware of it in the moment, those words freed me—to start submitting, keep submitting, and put myself out there in a big way. Until Anese said the words, “they weren’t ignoring me,” I unknowingly believed that any response short of, “We’d love to have you,” meant they thought I wasn’t good enough.

 

“Misti,” Anese continued, “I had been trying to get the opportunity to publish an article in Inc. for years. At the end of one of my speaking events, an editor from Inc came up to me and asked if I’d like to have my own column with them.”

 

Deeply inspired by her tenacity, I made a decision in that moment, and have been submitting my name to speak at various events ever since. Recognizing this may take some time, I created a spreadsheet to keep track of my march toward my dreams.

 

Interestingly, before that conversation with Anese, I believed I was doing everything I could to get opportunities to speak. Now, I’m left wondering if I am unknowingly “playing small” in other areas of my life in order to avoid feelings of rejection.

 

When you’re open and trusting of all emotions, you’ll see the signs pointing you in the direction you need to go. While we do not typically think of anger, irritation, or frustration this way, they are excellent clues to help us see where we need to pay attention.

 

What agitates you? The answer may point you to a deeply ingrained behavior that needs to change. Happiness and joy are easier to tap into, while irritation is inherently repulsive. Use frustrating moments to listen to the thoughts you’re thinking, and the beliefs they create. Ask yourself if those thoughts are adding to your courage, or robbing you of the opportunities you crave.

 

While it’s easy to think in terms of “good/bad or right/wrong,” consider saying to yourself, “Isn’t that interesting?” when you uncover truths about yourself that are uncomfortable. Having a gentle curiosity provides the strongest foundation for growth.

 

“Your limitations are your invitations.”—Beth House Graham.

 

Rather than resisting the reality of self-limiting thoughts and beliefs, meet them with an open, curious, mind. From this vantage point, new beliefs can make their way into your consciousness.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

Over the past two weeks, we covered tips 1-7.  You can gain access to 1, 2, and 3, here. You can gain access to 4-7 here.

Provoke Their Greatness Tip #8 

Our DNA is already wired for success. While their performance and perceived attitude might not always be up to par, remember they are wired for success. Sometimes fears (humanity) get in the way of asking for help, which leads to underperformance and attitude problems. Fortunately, this is where tip 4 comes in handy. If their performance isn’t up to par, work with them (get your hands dirty) to find out what you can do to help them get better results.

Provoke Their Greatness Tip #9 

Authentically caring about their success gives you permission to provoke. You know that quote by Theodore Roosevelt, “Nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.” If you’re going to challenge (provoke) your team to do meaningful work—to care about their results—you have to care about them. One leader told me about his frustration with a handful of executives on his team who were demonstrating a lack of care about their results. When I asked him if he cared them, I wasn’t surprised when he said, “No.” If you don’t care, why should they?

Provoke Their Greatness Tip #10 

Appreciation and acknowledgment are like candy to the soul, regardless of generation. Once you find out how your team members enjoy being appreciated and acknowledged (some thrive on public announcements—others get embarrassed), look for areas where they shine and let them know. No, it won’t blow up their head, but it will open their heart and keep them focused doing excellent work, raving about your leadership, and encouraging customers and colleagues to buy into your product, service, or team.

So, what's a high-stakes leadership challenge you're working on right now?  How are you going to provoke greatness, earn trust, and achieve your strategic goals?

Want more tips on how to overcome irritation and get any employee to care about their contribution?  Check out this The Power of Love at the Office post.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

As the author of Provoking Greatness: Unleashing Hidden Potential (Which Seth Godin says is “a generous book about stepping up to make art, to matter, and to contribute,” I’m often asked to coach progressive and passionate leaders.

 

In fact, I’ve had the chance to work with and speak for leaders at Johns Hopkins, NASA, and Johnson & Johnson, just to name a few.

 

Following my presentations, I often conduct on-the-spot coaching for those seeking to go beyond pushing for performance, onto provoking greatness. Many of these leaders have found themselves trapped in busy work, and are ready to free their time to focus on bigger projects.

 

Based on feedback from several leaders, they found the following tips particularly helpful in helping them free up their time to go bigger, while getting their team to step up.

 

These tips work whether you’re the CEO, mid-level manager, or requesting resources for a project. As one client told me, "They actually work ANYTIME you need to get stuff done through others."

 

Provoke Their Greatness Tip #1

 

Identify your end zone. No football player ever trained hard, practiced hard, or played hard without an end zone. Where are you taking your team, and why does it matter? Less than 10% of leaders ever identify a worthy goal (other than to make more money), and it’s the reason that 70% of employees lack confidence in the abilities of senior leadership according to the Dale Carnegie Employee Engagement Study. Increase confidence, increase engagement, and increase your free time… establish a worthy goal.

 

Provoke Their Greatness Tip #2

 

Know what’s fueling the machine. There are a variety of reasons people work hard. Here are a few:

 

—Make money

—A worthy goal/vision

—Make a difference/contribution

—Advance their skills

—Gain experiences

—Be appreciated

—Keep learning

—Achieve a particular title

—Lead a team

 

Just like regular fuel may destroy a car that’s meant to burn diesel, many leaders hamper motivation by assuming the that what motivates one person will motivate everyone. Know your team, and focus on helping them gain the success that’s meaningful to them.  

 

Provoke Their Greatness Tip #3

 

Their success is your success. Many people wind up in leadership positions because they got stuff done—they took the reins, worked hard, and produced results. The problem is the drive that earned them the title is not the same kind of drive needed to get results through people. Frustrated, these awesome people resort to, “I have more experience, I’m the boss, now do what I’m telling you to do.” Annoyed with mediocre work, these same remarkable people wind up staying late, working harder, and wasting time complaining about their team. They—their team—are not the problem. Instead, the opportunities lies in reframing their new position, and learning how to get results through others.

 

Rather than outshining others to move ahead, you have to intentionally be outshone by your team to continue advancing. Make their success your main focus and watch as your results soar.

 

Be on the lookout—Tips 4-7 coming next week.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

Two of the greatest lies destroying our workforce today are: we can’t earn a living using our God-given talents & my employees don’t care.

 

In reality, we all want to use our natural talents to help our team, company, community, country, and our world—we just don’t always believe we can, and so we unconsciously sabotage ourselves in the process. Great leaders see this, and seek to provoke greatness in spite of insecurities.

 

The leaders who experience the greatest results from their team are the ones dedicated to looking beyond the dirt (lack of experience, inability to communicate effectively, impatience, etc) as they mine for gold (the natural talent within their team, fully expressed).

 

Here’s what believing in your team looks like:

 

1. Access to the full range of talents, passion and energy on your team. We always find what we’re looking for, so remember to stay focused on and nurturing of their talents.
2. You get the benefit of their creative and innovative minds. When your vision (goals) are clear, mistakes are an expected part of the process, team members care about each other and your customers, they will go to the end of the earth to create new solutions… netting greater profits.
3. You reach for goals together. Seeking to achieve meaningful outcomes brings with it the possibility of failure, which can easily provoke fear and stop us in our tracks. In the context of a supportive team, the burden of risk is well distributed.
4. You get to challenge (provoke) each other to reach for your dreams, individually and collectively. Success in one part of our life infects every other part of our lives, driving energy, passion, and commitment deeper into every other aspect of our lives. Leaders who focus on the whole package and seek to help their team reach their goals, will always wind up with a more dedicated and committed team.
5. You reach further, with less effort. Trust and tolerance of failure bring with them the possibility of empowering others to step up and do the work that scares them. When perfection gives way to learning and advancing, time is freed to stretch ourselves to reach for bigger dreams.
6. You enjoy the benefits of a team who cares about their results. When you care enough to believe in them, they’ll care enough to believe in you, your vision, and your results.
7. You get to keep growing and advancing in your career. When you hand over the exciting and rewarding work you do, you create time and space for new opportunities to be dreamed up and executed on. Horde the wealth, and you’ll stop the inflow; share it, and you’ll expand into it.
8. You sleep peacefully, trusting your team has the ball. Everyone wants to play their part; it’s just that some leaders rob them of the opportunity. When you allow your team to do their best work, you free yourself to rest peacefully.
9. You wake up happy to go to work. Who doesn’t want to go play (I mean work) with people who believe in, challenge, and support them?
10. You dream bigger, and have the time to make it all happen. Courageous leaders who believe in greatness are willing to share their dreams and disappointments, all the while allowing their team to step up and help make it happen.
11. You disconnect as often as you want, and feel comfortable going on vacations. When you no longer have to be the hero (needed one), your team gets to raise to the occasion, make decisions, and experience the thrill of success (and sometimes gain the lessons from failure).

 

Belief is powerful, and fortunately adjustable. Ready for more of the benefits of believing in your team? Perhaps it’s time to evolve your thinking, and thus your beliefs.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

 

People who want your stuff—want your stuff. You don’t have to force the gift that is you. The right people come and the wrong ones go. Your job is to focus on the ones who stay, even after you risked the possibility of rejection on the deepest level.

Reject who I was pretending to be? No problem. Reject, or avoid connecting with the “me” beneath the layers of my own uncertainty? No thank you. It’s hard enough to accept and embrace myself—I don’t need to worry about you.

Thinking everyone should stay, we struggle with the ones who don’t honor us.

“I’m out here on an edge—throw me a bone, please. Encourage me, support me, but please don’t tell me to ‘get over it,’” we think, embarrassed we haven’t gotten over the difficulty of embracing our own stories.

For the ones who cannot handle our courage to step into the truth of who we really are, for fear they might also be seen, please step to the side graciously. Step inside, if you can—and let your own journey to freedom begin.

While they might not be ready, you are. So, step unabashedly to the edge, peek over, and notice the calm you feel. Go back and forth if you need to. Before you know it, the cliff will gently grab your ankle and nudge you to feel the pure bliss that is you. 

No, you don’t have to try to be you, and you don’t have to try to get anyone to want your stuff. What you have to do is keep noticing, celebrating, and sharing the art that so beautifully makes its way into your heart.

Architects, surgeons, accountants, and writers alike—there is a passion boiling in your soul, begging to be shared with the world. Can you hear it?

Get present, share your truth, your passion, and then allow—don’t force—the right people to come. Like moths to a shining ray of light in the darkest night, they will be attracted to the freedom emanating from your courage to do the simplest thing on the planet—be yourself.

Most people are trying to be the same without realizing it, and they end up attracting people who are just like them. Not many people opt for writing their own rules, or crafting their own stories—it’s easier to accept the stories we’ve been delivered, even if these stories drain years off our life.

Women shouldn’t …

Men should…

Children should never…

It seems easier to avoid the pain we think we’re going to confront when we show our true desires, interests, and passions, so instead we lie… about who we are… in an attempt to be like everyone else, which is even more painful. Why? Because we are betraying ourselves to become something we’re not. That’s painful.

But don’t worry, we’ll take our pain out on you because clearly you’re the reason we cannot be ourselves. Of course, that’s not true, but it is the lie we silently tell ourselves.

We want to share ourselves with the world, but it’s not safe. Not unless the people you’re with are willing to take the risk with you. “Come to the edge with me,” we unconsciously nudge, not recognizing if they are even ready. We’re all ready in our own time.

We think we need them to continue the journey, but we don’t. What we need is to keep peeking over the edge, noticing what we see, and embracing the thrill of the free fall. 

What we need is to halt all attempts to show others the person we think they will like, and instead opt for the truth. Such radical self-acceptance is at the heart of what causes artists like Pharrell to sing from the depths of their soul, Freedom.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

Last week, I talked about how to give yourself permission to struggle (evolve). In this post, I share what I think of as the most important element to our personal growth.

 

Acknowledging the difficulty of evolution is the perfect place to begin. Recognizing the sheer challenge of our own evolution gives us permission to struggle. Sounds crazy—who wants permission to struggle? You do, that’s who. Difficulty can never be used to mold you into a stronger, more authentic, version of yourself if you never experience it.

 

When we welcome such difficulties, we train ourselves to hold the space for our own evolution to occur on the inside—the only place real change happens. What we see on the outside is a reflection of what we’ve accomplished on the inside. Our reaction to others acceptance, or lack thereof, cues us into our progress and perhaps our opportunity.

 

Such an intimate experience with our own evolution gives us the insight and compassion to hold the space for others to evolve. The greatest friendships are made from the depth of conversations and struggle inherent in such change. It’s rarely an easy process for either person, and yet both people come out stronger because of it.

 

Whether you opt for new friends and colleagues, or test out your current ones, remember the difficulty inherent in evolution is worth it. The value of such growth is at the source of life. 

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

Jennifer R. Lieberman’s passion is not only infectious… it is literally transforming the way an entire industry thinks about health care and leadership.

 

If you want to gain access to truth behind what it takes to create collaboration and innovation, listen to this podcast!

 

Jennifer Liebermann is a Kaiser Permanente “intrapraneur” who is passionate about shaping the future of health.  In 2006, she launched Kaiser Permanente’s Garfield Health Care Innovation Center, the first of its kind. The Garfield Center enables patients and clinicians to envision the future of health care and create it in a safe, simulated environment.  Described as a “giant Montessori school for adults”, the Garfield Center draws on design thinking principles to ideate, prototype and spread innovation.

 

Throughout the podcast, you will hear candid answers to following questions:

 

1. How do you get people inside an organization as big as Kaiser Permanente to collaborate?
2. How do you get buy-in at all levels?
3. If innovation and collaboration are critical to a leaders success, what is the first step any organization must take to begin the process?
4. How do you get people to feel empowered and take action?
5. How do you get people to shift their behaviors when they’re used to working in a certain way?

 

 

To learn more about Jennifer, click here. You can learn more about Garfield Health Care Innovation Center by clicking here.

 

I hope that one day all leaders adopt your philosophy and commitment, Jennifer—Thank you for being a powerful force for innovation in our health care industry!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

 

Having moved many times in my life, I’d grown accustomed to the (hidden) benefit of starting over—zero expectations. When you’re brand new to a community, they don’t know what to expect, and so you have a chance to try on new behaviors and beliefs.

 

Changing the way we show up for people who have come to expect certain behaviors and beliefs is far more challenging then starting fresh. Having relationships that are deep and meaningful can create expectations that may easily halt our growth, lest we lose the people we hold dear to us.

 

When expectations are deeply rooted, and any deviation from the norm causes discomfort, our tendency is to hold tightly to worn out patterns. It’s easier to let the urge to evolve pass than it is to risk the possibility of losing the people we love.

 

Yet, change is the only real constant, and it’s necessary for living life. I suppose that’s why they say that some people show up in our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. The problem is that we get attached to the people we call friends, and often seek to force “a lifetime” onto those who were really meant for a reason or a season.

 

Unable to understand what’s really happening, we hold tightly to our friendships and unconsciously smash the flower of change braving its way to the surface. Unaware that acceptance begins on the inside, we search for approval on the outside. Their confused and uncomfortable expressions taunt us back into old patterns.

 

This is why moving helps us grow. Moving allows us to create ourselves anew, with much less fear of loss. New friends, colleagues, and bosses are void of expectations, freeing us to try on new behaviors and beliefs—ones more fitting for our own evolution.

 

Of course the problem with too much “new” is the lack of depth offered by time and experiences. Fortunately, for most of us, the potential for change on the inside is far greater than change in location. So, the real question becomes, how do we graciously allow for evolution in our own minds, bodies, and spirits?

 

In next weeks post, we are going to discuss this very topic: how to evolve, graciously.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

Neatly stacked piles of paper with research from Harvard, Wharton, and Stanford sat on the table as we began our discussion about the event we were planning.

 

“What’s that?” I asked my soul sister and colleague, Mali Phonpadith, excited to talk about how we can pull our resources together and co-produce a retreat for executives seeking breakthroughs in leadership.

 

With an excited look on her face, she grabbed the first stack and said, “I went through all the top business schools and leadership training programs I could find. I pulled together the best language from each website and printed it to help us with messaging.”

 

My stomach cringed at the thought of regurgitating the same old language everyone else was using. I wanted to think about what we have to offer as unique and create our own language based on that.

 

Considering Mali’s level of excitement, I couldn’t just say, “Scrap that. Let’s create our own,” so instead I asked more questions and listened. Her thought process made perfect sense… from the perspective I held a couple of years back when she was helping me with messaging for my website.

 

“Mali, I appreciate you for doing all this research,” I said, “and I think we need to put it to the side for now.”

 

Seeing the look of confusion on her face, I paused and suggested that we come back to what everyone else was saying to lure executives after we’ve uncovered the language that was most fitting for our unique value proposition.

 

Almost as soon as she sat back, I knew the scene she was about to recall.

 

“Misti,” she said, “do you remember that day I came to your office and we spent hours going over your messaging?”

 

Of course I did. It was an agonizing three hours that resulted in a bunch of words that made no sense to me. I was frustrated and irritated that Mali—the messaging genius—didn’t hand me the perfect words to create a sudden influx of the perfect clients.

 

“You demanded…,” she started, before I cut her off with, “I know, I know.”

 

Finishing her thought…“Every time I would ask questions related to the work you do, you’d cut me off—‘no, Mali, I can’t use that language. I have to find the words people are looking for’—you insisted.”

 

Exhaling, as I sat back in my chair, and all I could muster was, “I know. You’re right. I know.”

 

With that, she stood up, paced for a few brief moments before saying, “You graduated, and I need to acknowledge that.”

 

While her language didn’t resonate with me, her intention inspired me to do the same for every person in my life—let them show up new.

 

It’s easy to think you know someone, but pigeonholing others doesn’t give them a chance to continue their own evolution/growth. And, if the only thing that stays the same is change, we’d do well to support and encourage positive change.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

Back in December, I had the great privilege of capturing Rich’s simple system for building a life, company, and career that spreads joy across the globe. For more on that interview, click here.

This time around I wanted to get Rich’s perspective on why it’s lonely at the top, and some strategies for increasing connection and joy from the top. Without realizing it, I tapped right into one of his greatest struggles as an executive within a large company, before co-founding Menlo Innovations.

Throughout this interview, Rich shares exactly what he continues to do every day to ensure he eliminates loneliness and has a real feeling on joy in his work.

Here are the links to the books both Rich and I talk about during the interview:

The Highest Goal

The 5th Discipline

Peter Drucker’s Books

Mega Trends

The Untethered Soul

The Surrender Experiment

Bury My Heart

Rich’s cure to loneliness at the top:

1. Build meaningful relationships. A key question to ask during any meeting that fosters depth in relationships: “Tell me your life story.”
2. Invest in yourself. (i.e. get and devour books like the ones listed above).
3. Ask yourself, “Why did I get into this line of work in the first place? And, how do I get back to that?”

Just before we completed the interview, Rich said something that inspired me greatly, and while I did not write down his exact words, it went something like this…The further you get from the truth of who you are, the more isolated and lonely you’ll be—the closer you are to that same truth, the more joy you’ll experience.

How often are you to doing the work you care deeply about? How close are you to aligning your work with the core of who you are?

To learn more about Rich, and Menlo Innovations, click here.

I hope that one day all leaders adopt your philosophy, Rich—Thank you for sharing the gift of you!

Here’s to Your Greatness,
Misti Burmeister

 

While anger, irritation, frustration, and sadness are generally undesirable, they can be quite useful in uncovering the difference we need to make. Complaining is another clue to pay attention to—the stronger and more consistent the complaint, the greater the potential opportunity. 

It’s easy to complain and criticize—to sit in the stands, drink beer, eat hot dogs, and curse at (I mean cheer for) players. You don’t have to take any hits, or worry about the cost of your mistakes, but you also never get to feel the immense satisfaction of scoring.

While some games are better left to elite athletes, most of us are unknowingly missing out on the games that are meant for us. When sitting in the stands and yelling is causing ulcers, anxiety, and sleepless nights, get on the field. Often the games we’re meant to play choose us, and anger, irritation, frustration, and sadness are our clues.

While listening to my friend Frank-the-farmer lament about the unethical farming practices of a few of his colleagues, I found myself wondering why Frank hasn’t found a way to package his knowledge and make a difference in his industry.

Angry and irritated with several people in his industry, Frank explained various reasons he doesn’t agree with the farming practices of his colleagues.

“One guy buys a bunch of cull meat in Maryland, and sells it as grass-fed beef in Virginia,” Frank said, disgusted by the unethical nature of such a move.

Having spent enough time with Frank on the farm, I knew that a cull is a female cow that can no longer give birth, rendering her a perfect candidate for the butcher, but I didn’t understand why such a practice irritated Frank.

“The meat is old, gamey, and typically sold to low-end restaurants locally. Disguising it as grass-fed gives the consumer the wrong impression of how grass-fed meat is supposed to taste,” Frank fired back at me.

“But female cows are 100% grass-fed,” Frank, “Don’t they spend their lives on the pastures, grazing?” I asked.

“Yes, but this practice makes it difficult for farmers who are doing grass-fed beef properly to compete. The quality of the meat is nowhere near the same, and the consumer doesn’t know any better.”

His argument made perfect sense, and I found myself armed with a whole new set of questions to ask a farmer before purchasing meat. That gift aside, I was concerned about Frank’s level of frustration. It’s excellent fuel for progress, but it can also become exhausting without action.

Throughout our conversation, I learned about the farmer who is exceedingly successful, but only because of his dog-and-pony show.

“He wears a beat up straw hat for his presentations and interviews, but the hat doesn’t have a single sweat stain on it,” Frank said, having clearly experienced the kind of sweat those hats see in the summer months. “And,” he added, “He was given three-hundred acres of land from his family—that’s not sustainable farming.”

He’s right. Most people who are interested in farming are not handed three hundred acres of land, but I wondered how the majority could benefit from the minority. More importantly, I wonder if Frank can see the various opportunities he has right in front of him to use his anger as fuel to both learn and educate.

No fan (irritated or excited) has ever scored a touchdown. It’s easy to sit in the stands and yell at the players, but it’s not going to move the ball down the field. Your supportive cheer may be the energy the players need to step up their game, but yelling profanity at your team never does any good.

Here’s the point: If you find yourself irritated or angry about what’s happening, get in the game and contribute what you can to get the ball going in the direction you care about.  

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

Love is a strong word that many reserve for close friends and family. But what results can love offer in a leadership context? What does love at the office even mean?How To Let Love Inspire Your Leadership: A Raw Conversation between Anese Cavanaugh and Misti Burmeister

These are the questions that drove this unique conversation between two women who have worked with hundreds of leaders in corporations throughout the globe. Listen in.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

MGosh, Anese Cavanaugh is amazing. She’s authentic, passionate, and deeply committed to helping you show up, powerfully. Whether you’re seeking to strengthen your leadership presence, increase your energy, or improve confidence throughout your team, listen to this interview!

Top innovators and executives in companies like IDEO, Zingerman’s, Cooper, Joie de Vivre, Fitbit, and others have engaged with Anese to strengthen team health, maximize leadership impact, and optimize company culture. In addition to appearing in publications like The Huffington Post, CEO.com, and the NY Times, Anese writes regularly for Inc.com in her column “Showing Up”. Follow her @AneseCavanaugh.

Anese is the creator of the IEP Method® (Intentional Energetic Presence), an advisor and thinking partner to leaders and organizations around the world, and author of Contagious Culture: Show Up, Set the Tone, and Intentionally Create an Organization That Thrives (McGraw Hill).

During the interview, Anese provided a simple strategy to discovering your core values. Knowing, and staying true to, your values, increase confidence. Here’s a part of the process to get you started—Take note:

• What pisses you off, irritates, or angers you? Why?
• Where you do tend to spend your money?
• What’s most important to you?

To show up powerfully,

• Reboot your presence in the moment—get intentional about the impact you want to make and how you want to feel.
• Set intentional outcomes for your meeting, day, month, year, etc.
• Take good care of yourself—mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

Here are a few more helpful links, courteously of the superstar herself, Anese. Thank you!

• IEP QuickStart Toolkit, Presence Guide, and additional resources.
• Anese’s site (with her blog, articles, interviews, goods galore, and more!)

Here’s to Your Greatness,
Misti Burmeister

 

 

In a society that treasures independence, we struggle with the notion that we should ever need help.

“If I ask you, then I owe you,” ripples through our minds as we sit inside the safety of our home, wishing for freedom and complaining about our circumstances. Besides, even if we did ask, we risk the possibility that you might say “No,” leaving us open to feelings of rejection.

It’s hard to ask for help, and it’s even difficult to offer it at times. It’s frustrating to deal with the people who refuse to accept help, lest you make a real human connection with them—one where money and power diminish in exchange for a deeper human connection.

We all have needs, and we all struggle with loneliness. Few of us are willing to let our guard down long enough to experience the pure bliss that is connection. The vast majority keep our walls fully erect—to the death, if necessary.

How might your life be different if you lived and worked in a community where difficulties were expressed openly, emotions had the space to breathe, and hugging were as natural as breathing? What if meaningful conversations were commonplace, and such dialogue prompted not only healing, but also accountability? 

While changing the world is overwhelming, consider the possibilities when you lead the change within your community by replacing your desire to—

• Be in Control
• Horde—opportunities, relationships, and things
• Be fiercely independent

With a willingness to—

• Connect through your struggles, and triumphs
• Love and give, without condition or expectation
• Allow for interdependence, and show affection, even with total strangers

It’s risky, but is it worth it? What would you gain if you did?

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

Why most people never decide to go for greatness

Saying you’ll start that certification someday isn’t the same as deciding to get the certification.

Without a decision, talk cheapens you. It provides entirely too much room for letting yourself off the hook. It’s easy to say you’re going to read a book a month, write for an hour every day, take on a new project, or finish your degree.

Decision puts you on the hook, and leaves you vulnerable. You could fail.

Actually, that’s not true. You cannot fail. Failure doesn’t really exist, except in your mind. You learn what doesn’t work, and you wind up with new information to help you in your next step forward. Seriously.

Technically, I failed in my attempt to swim those five miles around Gibson Island back in September of 2015. At roughly the 3 mile mark, they pulled a handful of us out, motored us ahead by about ¾ of a mile, and then plopped us back in to finish the swim.

With my decision on the line, I did everything I could to complete that swim. Three hours, five-foot swells, and a motor boat is what was needed, but I did finish. Some say we swam closer to six or seven miles. I say, I showed up, got in that water, and gave every bit of what I had until I crossed the finish line.

Success isn’t always what we think it should look like. Sometimes in our pursuits, we get a great deal more than we bargained for. The key is to decide. Make the decision to finish, especially if the result matters to you.

When you fail at something that’s meaningless, no problem. Fail at something you care about? No thank you!

Let’s be clear—I’m not talking about the decision to go to the grocery store. That’s comfortable, easy, and even necessary.

What I am talking about is your decision to—start the business, take ownership of that project/result, learn that new skill, finish your degree, sing for the public, join that exercise class, go to Italy, double your income, etc. Dream, decide, action, and than get through the first thirty minutes.

When you care deeply about the result you’re aiming to achieve, and there’s a potential for failure, it feels vulnerable. When you feel that, you know you’ve stumbled upon a goal worthy of your decision, action, and staying power.

Yesterday, I decided to double my income this year, and then I promptly started an argument with my partner. This decision feels ridiculously vulnerable to me. I don’t even like talking about money. I would rather have a root canal than talk about, or set goals around, money.

That said, it’s time to get uncomfortable. So, there, I’ve decided to double my income this year. And—I have no idea how I’m going to do it.

After you send me a fist full of cash—just for the fun of it—please go make a decision to create the success that’s meaningful to you, even if it scares you.

Let fear be your guide to knowing how much you really care.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

 

Dr. Hans Finzel is the author of nine books, including his bestseller The Top Ten Mistakes Leaders Make (David C Cook) and his newest release The Power of Passion in Leadership. His books have been published in over twenty foreign languages.

 

Hans is a mentor, speaker and trusted authority in the field of leadership. He is host of “The Leadership Answer Man” Podcast. Hans has trained leaders internationally on five continents. He and Donna founded HDLeaders in 2012 where he serves as President.

 

Far beyond his experience and wealth of knowledge lies a man who cares deeply about serving. Through this interview, Hans shares valuable insight into the visionary process, inspiring change, and empowering others to step up.  

 

To learn more about Hans, book him as a speaker, or gain access to finding your passion zone, click here and sign up.

 

Thank you for sharing the gift of you, Hans!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

“What’s the point of focusing on getting women into leadership roles?” Yvette asked in a conversation off line, prior to this interview. Knowing her generous, supportive nature, I was taken aback by her question. Doesn’t she know how important it is to see people like us in leadership positions?

Having spent several years focused in the area of diversity, through my work with generational differences, I had to find out why a woman, who is a senior producer in an all male dominated industry (video-gaming) would ever ask that question.

So, I roped her into a twenty-minute interview on this very topic. Not only does she share practical strategies for getting the support you need as an up-and-comer, she nails the single greatest reason she’s never struggled with the idea of becoming a leader in the industry.

Listen in to find out how you can rise through the ranks, and get your foot in the door of any industry.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearingforgreatness/

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

P.P.S In the spirit of full disclosure, I have the privilege of being married to this wonderful woman.

“How did they do that?” we ask ourselves as we watch the Olympian finish the race, the teenager sell a multi-million dollar business, or the juggler throw sharp knives into the air, while balancing himself on a unicycle.

 

How does anyone do anything of significance? (Significance defined: important to you.)

 

“Misti,” my accountant said, “I’ve been trying to train for a 5K for years, but I can’t seem to stay with the training. Any suggestions?”

 

Whether you decide to get an MBA, change industries, develop meaningful relationships, or run a 5K, there are 3 key factors to keep in mind. Here they are:

 

• Decide
• Act
• The first 30 minutes

 

There’s a distinct difference between saying, “I want to run a 5K,” and deciding to run a 5K. The first lacks an unwavering commitment, while the later forces us into action. Put your word to it—decide. Make the decision, and consider it done.

 

Without decision, you will not take action on the various stepping-stones thrown into your path to help you reach success. Interestingly, these stepping-stones don’t always look like they’re supposed to help you.

 

I certainly did not ask for 5 foot swells on the morning of my 5-mile swim around Gibson Island, after raising $5K. But, I did finish the swim, after only learning to swim 1 year before. Turns out, there were many more lessons to be learned in the pursuit of that goal. They weren’t fun, or easy, but so, so valuable.

 

Decide, and than act. Don’t think. Don’t even question. Just Act, and then get past the first 30 minutes.  

 

The barrage of negative self-talk will hit you like a ton of bricks in those first 30 minutes, and you’ll want to give up—to quit. You’ll reason with yourself—

 

“I could die, or at the very least die of embarrassment.”

“What’s the point anyway?”

“Hey, at least you tried. Good enough, now you can quit.”

 

After thirty minutes—almost like magic—it quiets, and you find yourself well on your way to reaching success. I promise you it will quiet, but you’ve got to get through the first thirty minutes. You have to hunker down, stay focused, and ignore every word you’re telling yourself.

 

Notice the thoughts, sure. But don’t give them authority.

 

When you take these three steps, you will get so much more than your certificate of completion, gold metal, or new job title. The wisdom and depth of friendships that come as a result of your decision, relentless action, and staying power (first 30 minutes) are more valuable than… the Bentley I saw in the parking lot yesterday.

 

That car was fancy, and super cool looking. And I don’t even care about cars.

 

You get the point, right? Decide, act, and then stay, even when every part of you is telling you to quit. Even when quitting makes sense. Finish!

 

Nothing kills self-confidence more than quitting. Quit once, and you’ll unknowingly give yourself permission to keep quitting. A lifetime of quitting… well, just look around you at the people who have spent their lifetime quitting.

 

Decide, act, stay, and then finish.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

Recently, I took my car in to get new brakes and rotors. After learning it would take two hours, I grabbed my computer and walked to a local coffee shop to work.

 

Six hours later, as they were putting the last tire back on my car, a lug nut broke, and they had to call the parts shop down the street. Realizing it was going to be at least a couple more hours, the manager encouraged me to get a rental car from a block away.

 

When I came back the next day to get my car, George, another shop manager who I’ve had several good experiences with was there and so I asked him what happened the day before.

 

“The guys don’t always respond well to the other manager. They had bitten off more than they could chew and the guys weren’t pushing hard to catch up,” George said.

 

“Why is that?” I asked, remembering the other managers exasperated look from the day before.

 

“When I ask them for a favor, they bend over backwards to help me. They don’t for him,” George said.

 

“Why?”

 

Looking me in the eyes, and in a hushed tone, he said, “I get my hands dirty with them.”

 

Quiet, as I took in the ridiculous simplicity of his statement, George continued, “Things aren’t like they used to be when I was growing up. The older guys used to teach and mentor us younger ones. That just doesn’t happen in this industry anymore.”

 

Curious, I asked, “How old are you, George?”

 

“Thirty-two.”

 

Yes, thirty. Two. He was talking about “how things used to be” when he was growing up, and he’s thirty-two.

 

Fortunately, it’s never too late to resurrect a practice that works. If the folks on your team aren’t performing up to snuff, perhaps it’s the perfect time to get your hands dirty with them.

 

While it’s easy to visualize what a mechanic might do to “get his hands dirty,” it may not seem as obvious in other professions. Here are a few key challenges that are excellent cues for where you may need to get your hands dirty with a team member:

 

• They keep turning in subpar work.
• You find yourself complaining about their performance.
• They don’t jump on opportunities.
• They consistently miss deadlines.
• They’re working a ridiculous amount of hours trying to keep up.
• You’re working a ridiculous amount of hours doing their job, and yours.
• They’re complaining about their workload.

 

Very few people are good at asking for the help they need, and nearly everyone wants to do good work. While it’s tempting to get irritated with people who don’t ask for the help they need, it’s far more kind to ask questions, generously observe, and look for ways to help them improve.

 

I don’t know about you, but I’d certainly work harder for someone who helps me improve, than a boss who wastes time complaining.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

  

Misti Burmeister

 

NEW! You can now gain easy access to discovering your blind spots and the solutions to your greatest leadership challenges through a Gearing for Greatness session. Check it out: http://mistiburmeister.com/gearing-for-greatness/

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

How to Keep Growing

 

In my last blog post, I provided practical steps for resurrecting your curiosity. Inflow and Outflow are two critical elements to I discussed at the end of that post. 

 

To keep the inflow of ideas surging through you, follow your curiosity. And, remember that sharing what you’re learning is an excellent way to keep the full cycle in motion. When you share (outflow), you learn (inflow). It’s the reason I write blogs like this, coach, and speak. 

 

Since we know that what gets measured, gets managed, be sure to go back to step two every day. Track your inflow and outflow by filling in the following in your journal every day:

 

• Learning: (Take note of what you learned about yourself, or from your environment.)
• Contribution: (Take note of how you contributed to the world around you.)
• Action: (Take note of the actions you will take as a result of what you’re learning.)

 

Do this every day, and before you know it, you’ll not only be relevant, but happy.

Joel Boggess is an incredibly generous author, coach, and podcaster who loves his two Golden Retrievers.

 

Throughout the podcast, he not only shared simple techniques for getting unstuck, and increasing your confidence, he also gave a personal example of a challenge he’s addressing right now. It has to do with his belief about being an entreprenuer.

 

Thinking of yourself as an entrepreneur, a leader, or simply someone with influence can be overwhelming for those who didn’t grow up around entrepreneurially-minded people. Shifting our belief systems challenging, and worth every bit of effort.

 

Joel shared about how he’s doing it.

 

During the interview, I asked Joel about how he helps people get unstuck, and gain a sense of direction. He shared about an exercise he takes people through that has proven results – here it is, especially for you.

 

Do the exercise, and let us know what you learn right here on the comment section of this blog.

 

To learn more about Joel, the ReLaunch podcast, or his inspiring training, go here and subscribe today.

 

Joel, you are remarkable, and I’m grateful I get the chance to share your brilliance with the world. Thank you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

Happiness and relevancy are made from the same material: Awareosity + tenacity.

 

Several years ago, I fell into the trap of believing that hunkering down and working harder would alleviate the fear and anxiety I was feeling and bring purpose to my life. Plugging away at my computer for hours every day, I struggled to understand why these emotions raged inside of me.

 

“Keep focused. Keep working,” I said to myself, embarrassed by my lack of focus, goals or direction. And—get this—at the time, I was writing a book about… focus. That sounded better than, “I’m sitting behind my computer, looking busy, but desperately wanting to be a student, learn, and connect with others.”

 

By the end of most days, I was thoroughly exhausted. Not from getting so much done, but from worrying about what I didn’t do.  The problem was, I could never get a sense for what I should have been doing.

 

Sound familiar?

 

You tell yourself, “Just get through this week/project/month/year, and then I’ll figure out what I need to do differently.” Or, “It’s just been a rough couple of years—it’ll work itself out.”

 

Problem is—it never does. Not by itself. Not without your help.

 

Fortunately, there is a simple process for increasing joy, happiness, relevancy, and meaning in your life and work: Awareosity.

 

Awareosity: To increase awareness around ones natural curiosity. (I’ll be sure to add the word to Wikipedia soon.)

 

As a 6-year-old, there was no need to become aware of your curiosity, nor did you need tenacity to explore. Rather than go into all the data chronicling how creativity and curiosity are hammered out of us by the time we get out of grade school, I’ll simply say it is.

 

And, it’s your job to resurrect it.

 

Here’s how:

 

Step One: Start noticing. What intrigues you? Trust me, you will always find what you’re looking for, so begin to notice (look for) what intrigues you.

 

While I didn’t realize it at the time, my curiosity for farming breathed of fresh air back into my life, increasing my happiness and, strangely, relevancy. This was during the time I mentioned above—when, unsure what to focus on, I busied myself writing a book about… focus. The only reason I allowed myself to deviate from my own suffering is because my friend Wendy wanted to know if I’d eat at a particular restaurant. At first glance, I couldn’t imagine why she would even ask.

 

It said right there on the menu, “We serve locally grown, grassfed, beef.” Thinking there must be a greater reason she asked me this question, I explored the website of the farm where they source their meat. Having never heard of “organic” grass, and seeing this sentence on their site, I was confused.

 

“Using strictly organic feed is extremely expensive, and would require us to raise prices about 50%.”

 

According to the FDA, “grassfed” means the animal has been fed only grass, and since the restaurant specifically noted “grassfed,” I was curious. This was the kind of curiosity I could not shake, and ultimately lead me to a wonderful friendship with farmer Mike, who has subsequently taught me more about the environmental impact of poop then I ever knew I wanted to know.  

 

Interestingly, just six months after I allowed my curiosity to surge, I landed an awesome contract to work with an environmental company. (Thank you Wendy for sparking my curiosity, and Mike for feeding it.)

 

Step Two: Take note. At the end of every day, go over your day. What happened, who did you meet, listen to, or chat with? What intrigued you? Write it down in a journal that you can come back to later. The key here is awareness. And, yes, forget your keyboard and write it down. There’s some kind of magical thing that happens when pen and paper connect with your hand. Write and reflect on what you noticed. If you didn’t notice anything—if you get through the week without any intrigue, it’s time to expose yourself. More about how to gain exposure here.     

 

A few weeks ago I met Joe, a sales rep for a 3D printing company in Baltimore, who shared a bit about how 3D printing works. I was fascinated! Later that night I journaled about my interest in 3D printing. The thought of printing an object was both foreign and intriguing to me. I had to learn about how it works, and see it for myself.

 

Step Three: Say, “Yes!” Considering how busy we are being busy, it’s easy to say, “I’ll check that out later.” Don’t do that. Later will never come, and you’ll always have a bazillion reasons why you don’t have time to follow your curiosity. Fail to follow it, and it’ll stop showing up. Feed it, and it’ll feed you.

 

The day after I met Joe the sales rep, I got an email from him asking if I’d like a tour of their 3D printing facility. “Yes!” While there, the CEO asked for a meeting to discuss the possibility of hiring me to work with his team. YES!

 

Your natural curiosity will lead you to meet interesting people who are passionate about what they are doing.  Those passionate and curious people will spark even more curiosity and intrigue. Being around other interesting and passionate people rubs off, so please feed your curiosity.

 

Remember, there is no need to force curiosity. You already have it.  All you need to do is pay attention to it and then give yourself permission to learn. Learning creates growth, and growth triggers meaning, relevancy, and ultimately, happiness.

 

Why happiness, you ask? Because learning triggers all kinds of happy chemicals: Dopamine, Serotonin, Endorphins and Oxytocin.  

 

Every time you think about relevancy and happiness, consider the fact that, depending primarily on your age and gender, you are made up of approximately 75% water. Delightfully delicious smelling water has two things that stale, stagnant water does not: inflow and outflow.

 

In my next blog post, I’ll talk more about how to incorporate Inflow and Outflow into your daily life. 

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

Loving your customers makes good business sense. Show them some love, and they’ll reward you by purchasing more and raving about you, which hopefully leads to more love affairs, purchases, and ultimately growth.

Loving on your boss makes good business sense too. Do remarkable work, and thank her for entrusting you with the project, and she’s likely to give you even more opportunities. Take those two actions consistently, and before you know it, you’ll be the boss.

Loving on your colleagues and your employees also makes good sense. It makes for ease in collaborating, and ultimately finishing projects. The more you love on them, the easier it is to get stuff done. Fail to love on them and you’ll wind up complaining about…well, everything related to them.

Finger pointing leads to frustration, hampering progress, and leaving you sitting at your desk late into the evening on Friday, searching for a way to complete the project by yourself. Doing it alone is easier anyway, right? In the moment, it seems smarter to focus on finishing instead of asking questions, listening, and looking for ways to help them succeed.

“Why in the world would I bother to help them succeed?” you ask. The obvious answer: that’s what leadership is.

The less obvious answer: helping them is helping you. Seeing beyond everyday annoyances and helping others reach their goals will almost always cause them to see beyond your annoying behavior, and help you succeed.

Many leaders understand that top-notch sales professionals reach a high level of success because they care enough to learn everything there is to know about their customers. (Some even know their kids’ lacrosse schedule, and remember to call and ask about the game.) Yet, very few understand why a now-ex-employee would ever say,

“This was the easiest job I ever quit. I didn’t feel like you cared, so why would I bother?”

Yes, that happened. Janice, a senior executive recruited for a critical position, really did say those words to her boss after finishing the project and leaving the company. And, she wasn’t trying to be cruel—just honest.

Stop for a moment. Think about the person you’ve been struggling to get results from, and ask yourself, “Do I care about this person’s success? How do I know I care?”

Go a little deeper, and ask, “Do I care about them, or the result I want them to create?” There’s no judgment here. Perhaps you’re hoping that pretending to care will get them to produce the result you want. And, it might…if you’re shortsighted.

The problem with pretending is that everyone can see right through it. They know what you care about—the result. And there’s no shame in caring about the result. The problem is that people help to create the result. And, if you don’t care about them, they’ll know it. Care about them, on the other hand, and they’ll run through walls to help you reach success.

Why is it that we struggle with opening ourselves up to feeling love…for our colleagues, employees, suppliers, and customers? The simple answer is: risk-reward ratio. Pretending is safe. We get to hold onto our false sense of control, and avoid revealing our true selves. If you reject my false self, no problem. Reject who I really am beneath the facade—now that hurts!

It’s easy to say, “Love without the condition that you’ll be loved in return,” but it’s hard to do. Add to that the fact that everyone shows love differently and you have a recipe for…most workplaces. This is why we tend to hire people who are just like us, despite the fact that being around people who are different from us makes us more creative, diligent, and harder-working.

So, how do you love despite the fact that they might leave for a better opportunity, or fail to reciprocate?

This is a particularly interesting question considering the number of leaders who have sought to imitate others who are getting the most media exposure. In reality, what works for one company (leader) isn’t necessarily going to work for the next.

Turns out, there’s a difference between seeking to get more out of your employees, and truly loving them enough to help them succeed. In reality, you cannot manufacture a loving environment, though some have tried—and failed.

If you want them to love their work environment, you have to show them some love by:

• Listening to their dreams/goals
• Communicating consistently
• Sharing your mistakes
• Celebrating successes and failures
• Challenging yourself openly
• Provoking their greatness
• Setting a bold vision
• Helping them remember that their contribution matters

Since loving your customers seems to make sense to most, let’s borrow from that idea. Loving your customers begins by taking the time and energy required to understand their needs—not even necessarily their need for your product/service, right away.

To communicate in their language, you must care enough to listen. The better the listener (dare I say, lover), the higher the sales. The same is true in leadership, even if they haven’t yet bought into your vision. The better the listener, the higher the performance.

The key here is authenticity. If you’re “loving on them” with the intention of getting something out of them, you’re really just manipulating them. Yet many leaders use this approach because it works—in the short term. In the long term, it destroys credibility, confidence, and trust—essential ingredients for creativity and innovation.

Authenticity begins with acknowledging the truth. If you don’t know what you care about, what you’re striving to achieve, or why it matters, chances are, they won’t either. The only way to win from this position is to manufacture (manipulate) success.

Please, save yourself the ulcers that come from this line of thinking, and love yourself enough to discover and communicate your passion, purpose, and vision. Once you opt for this path, loving others is simple.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

A pioneer in website development for big business, winner of numerous awards for his work in marketing, Bill Carmody simplifies marketing and makes his strategies available and easy to understand.

 

During the interview, Bill talked about the critical steps to gaining clarity in your marketing:

 

1.     Congratulate yourself when/if you recognize that you don’t know the “why” behind your business.
2.     Reconnect (or connect) to real reason (why) behind your business.
3.     Understand why anyone (beside obvious stakeholders) should care about the success of your business. E.g. Most people want to “Deliver Happiness” – well done, Zappos!
4.     Ensure your messaging is clear and easy to repeat.

 

Books referenced during interview:

 

Small Giants: Companies That Choose to Be Great Instead of Big

Daring Greatly

 

Thank you, Bill! I so enjoyed our bantering, as well as the opportunity to learn from you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

I pray every day, several times a time sometimes. I pray for clarity and opportunity—to speak, coach, and elicit meaningful conversations—to share the gifts God has given me.

I’m not a religious person, but I am spiritual, and the word God works for me.

My one request of God: “Open the door.”

My promise: “I’ll walk through it.”

Recently, I got a request to submit a video explaining what I would speak about, given the opportunity, to a group of small business owners that teacher insurance sales professionals how to sell.

“Will you please send me a link to their webpage?” I asked Mauricio, the guy with the speakers bureau.

“Well, I can, but it’s in Spanish. Is that okay?” He asked.

“You know I don’t speak Spanish, right?”

“Yes,” he said, “I submitted three names to my client—yours, and two Spanish women.”

“Really God? You want me to speak at an event that is almost exclusively Spanish?” I thought as I drove home to grab a shower (I was at the gym when I took the call), and record the stupid video.

I have no idea if I’ll get the opportunity, or how it will go if I do, or if this was just a test, but what I do know is that God opened a door. And I promised to step through.

Are you asking for doors to be opened? Because if you are, I would love to know—maybe I can help. Even if helping simply means holding your hand as you record the video.

Are you stepping through the doors God is giving you, or are you resisting such gifts because they don’t look the way you want them to look? I did that for far too long!

If you are, stop it. Please!

Get up and crawl through that door if you have to. And, please know, you’re not alone if you crawl. I’m here with you, and fully ready to hold hands as we brave our way through the beautiful challenges God keeps giving us—the ones that look like difficulty, hurt like heck, but somehow wind up strengthening us.

Deep beneath the surface of my goofiness is an awesome friend—one who loves you greatly and would walk through fire to help you get to see the gift that is you.

Please, dream big, ask big, and crawl if you need to. I’m here with you, and I love you.

 

“How old are you?” John asked, after I had shared a bit about my history, why I do this work, and a few of the results I’ve helped leaders create.

 

“Why does it matter?” I asked, wondering if he’d been listening to me.

 

“It lets me know how much experience you’ve had on this planet.”

 

Having met several wise teenagers, and at least as many 70- and 80-year-olds who are the opposite, I cringed at such thinking.

 

“Ask me about my results—they speak louder than my years on this planet,” I replied, irritated.

 

Considering his level of success as an executive, and the depth of his connectivity, I wanted to impress him—to get him to think of me as special, exceptional, and one-of-a-kind.

 

Abandoning my normal tendency to ask questions and listen when meeting someone new, I set out to prove myself. I rattled off one success story after another. All the while, John was staring off into space, waiting for me to stop talking long enough for him to end the conversation.

 

Soon after we parted ways, it occurred to me that in my quest to prove myself, I had completely forgotten a foundational principle for success: be interested, not interesting. Or, as Dale Carnegie said, “To be interesting, be interested.”

 

When you’re interested, there’s nothing to prove. But how do you let go of the urge to prove yourself when your capacity for curiosity has been overwhelmed by a fear of not being enough? Recognition is key. Perhaps you’ve heard the saying, “when you face the sun, the shadows fall behind you.”

 

Considering that we all process fear and anxiety differently, the key is understanding your response. Do you get louder, and talk more, or do you get quieter and secretly wish you could disappear? Do you tense up your stomach muscles? Do you find it hard to breathe because it feels like an elephant is sitting on your chest?

 

Clearly, we cannot control others’ opinions of us, but we can become aware of our own triggers and seek to understand them. The more we do, the better we get at listening more, talking less, and trusting that the right people will arrive, and the wrong ones will leave.

 

And, yes, asking good questions, listening intently, and seeking to understand—rather than be understood—demonstrates great wisdom. And, thankfully, I now understand the true gift in John’s question about my age.

 

Next time, John, a simple, “Shut up and listen” will do!   

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get In-Depth Techniques for Living and Provoking Greatness, click here, type in your email address, and press “Submit.”

 

his was quite possibly the most fun interview I’ve done. Dawnna’s approach to innovation is refreshing and practical.

 

Throughout the interview, Dawnna give’s practical steps for companies—large and small—to remain relevant, to innovate, and to do so within budget.

 

The following are 4 areas of innovation are covered within the interview (listen in to get the details):

 

1.     Routine.
2.     Disruptive.
3.     Radical.
4.     Architectural.

 

Also, Dawnna gave practical (and hugely valuable) advice to those of you who want to make sure your career is safe for the long haul. Relevancy is key to success whether you’re employee, or a company.

 

Advancing, or getting different results than you’re currently getting, requires doing something different, which isn’t always comfortable.

 

How many people do you know who keep doing the same things and hoping for different results? We’ve all done it. Why?

 

Because it’s easier, and more comfortable, to do what you know. But we learn—and grow more effective—during periods of discomfort, which is exactly why we need to train in discomfort.

 

Here’s how I unintentionally trained in discomfort recently.  

 

A good friend of mine told me about a spa that I had to experience. She went into elaborate detail about the healing nature of the various saunas, hot tubs, and treatments.

 

“It’s a full day experience,” Christina said, “and it’s thirty bucks.”

 

My partner, Yvette, had also heard great things about the spa from her aesthetician, who said we had to get the body scrub.

 

A full day of hot tubs, saunas, and body treatments? Sign me up!

 

We picked our date, and headed over to Security Mall, near Baltimore, Maryland.

 

Turns out, that mall is partially shut down, and the spa is located in the nearly deserted part.

 

There were giant “going out of business” signs over the entrance, the escalators weren’t running, and most of the lights weren’t on.

 

Clearly, this is going to be “a cultural experience,” I said to Yvette, as we made our way into the Korean spa.

 

We felt like we had been transported to another world. It had all the calming smells and relaxing music you’d expect of a spa. So, we scheduled our body treatments and headed back to the saunas.

 

They had a Himalayan salt room, jewel room, wood charcoal room, terracotta room, and even a cold room to cool off in between. It was nice, and very relaxing!

 

After a couple of hours of going back and forth between the various saunas and the cold room, we grabbed a bite at the spa’s Korean restaurant.

 

Stuff your face, and then go get a body treatment—great idea, right?

 

We headed to the hot tub area, which is behind the women’s locker room. To enter, you must remove clothing, and they request that you sit in the hot tub for twenty minutes prior to the treatment.

 

A while later, two middle-aged Korean ladies escorted us to a back area, where there were eight massage tables covered in heavy-duty plastic.

 

We stood there staring at each other for a good sixty seconds—they don’t know English and we don’t know Korean.

 

As I was trying to figure out where the sheets, face rest, and bolster were, one of the ladies looked at me and commanded, as she patted the table, “Sit.”

 

I sat.

 

“Lay down!”

 

I didn’t want to be rude, or offend her. So, I lay down. Then, without warning, she took a bowl of hot water and threw it on me.

 

“Well, okay then,” I said, trying to make it clear just how uncomfortable that was.

 

She doesn’t speak English.

 

She put another bowl of hot water on the table between my feet, slipped on orange gloves, and started scrubbing my feet and legs with what felt like…brillo pads.

 

That was when I realized I had NO—zero—zilch—nada—NONE…defenses. Everything was wet. I couldn’t even grab ahold of anything. My very full belly was hanging out, and I couldn’t even sweet-talk her into being nice.

 

I was totally, and completely…defenseless!

 

And my manners would not allow me to jump up and run out of there—that would be rude.

 

Besides, Yvette looked like she was enjoying this experience.

 

“She must have gotten the nice one!” I thought, reminding myself that this was a cultural experience—I wasn’t dying!

 

Or maybe I was…of embarrassment.

 

My belly certainly didn’t need any more scrubbing! But of course, I couldn’t tell her that.

 

Yvette broke the silence: “Do you see those pellets on your table?”

 

I saw what looked like little pieces of tea.

 

“That’s your dead skin,” she said.

 

“And you couldn’t let me get through this experience before telling me that?”

 

“Nope,” she said, clearly enjoying herself.

 

She must have gotten the nice one.

 

At about that time, my lady said, “Flip.”

 

In my mind, “flip” means “turn over.”

 

In mid-flip, she grabbed my leg and pulled, forcing me onto my side.

 

My manners, once again, stopped me from blurting out, “That’s ‘side,’ lady, ‘side.’”

 

When she threw another bowl of hot water on me, it became abundantly clear why I needed those layers of skin.

 

“A little burn isn’t going to kill you, Misti. Besides, remember, you’re having a cultural experience,” I said to myself.

 

As she was scrubbing my arm, she suddenly dropped it. My arm flopped on the table, and I couldn’t help but laugh at the thought that this was a game for her. How hard can I get her arm to hit the table?

 

The laughter released my tension, and I remembered that I knew one phrase in Korean, “Kamsahamnida,” which means, “Thank you.”

 

“Kamsahamnida, Kamsahamnida, Kamsahamnida, Kamsahamnida, Kamsahamnida,” I started repeating, hoping she’d see that I really am a good person.

 

After I made it to the end of the torture—I mean body scrub—she pointed to a sign: “Tips not included.”

 

I had some tips for her—sheets, pillows, a face rest, and warnings—please!

 

Then it occurred to me that anyone with that job deserves a big tip! So I hooked her up.

 

That evening, Yvette read a blogger’s post about her Korean spa experience. “Koreans ‘relax hard.’ You’re like a fish being scaled,” the blogger wrote.

 

You should try it. Really. Not because being scaled like a fish is delightfully fun and relaxing—though some people have argued with me about that. Try it—or your own version of it—because you’ll have a chance to experience discomfort, on purpose.

 

If you want to reach new levels of success in your career, with your team, or for a customer, you have to try something new. Training in discomfort will help you build tolerance for it in all areas of your life.

 

Feeling the feelings of discomfort at that spa—and not dying—helped give me the courage to write posts like this, create videos, and plan for a big event in 2016. Learning about your body’s natural reaction to fear can actually make you less afraid.  

 

 

Pam, a mentor cautioned me from the day I started doing this work nearly eleven years ago, “Misti, you’re going to need to expand on what you’re doing. You’ll get bored with speaking about generational differences at some point.”

 

At the time, I thought she was crazy, and so I ignored her advice. Instead, I kept my head down in my work, and stayed comfortable in what I knew, failing expand my service offerings.  

 

A couple of years later, remembering Pam’s words stung as I struggled to learn two important lessons: enthusiasm sells and Pam was right—my enthusiasm was gone.  

 

Instead of continuing to challenge myself, slowly over time, I was suddenly faced with, “Shift now, or die trying,” much the same as some big companies, like Blockbuster.

 

After spending far too long in self-pity and immense frustration, I allowed my natural curiosity to re-emerge. In my quest to understand the food industry, I found myself knee-deep in cow dung, learning about the proper density and it’s impact on the environment from my new friend, Mike, who runs a local farm.

 

Naturally, I also gravitated to Seth Goldman, CEO and co-founder of Honest Tea headquartered in Bethesda, Maryland. His passion for leadership, company culture, and, of course, tea, was infectious.

 

I devoured books like Conscious Capitalism, Start with Why, Turn the Ship Around, and Joy, Inc. just to name a few. My passion for understanding the people behind such great companies lead me to interviewing many of them on my Provoking Your Greatness podcast.

 

Just six months after I took the plunge and allowed my natural curiosity to take the place of comfort, I landed a career-changing opportunity to work with the CIO of an organization whose mission is literally to save our planet.

 

While it took me several years of frustration and pain to finally understand the true significance of Pam’s advice, I created a process to ensure I heed this advice for the rest of my life. Here’s my process, which I hope will continue to evolve:

 

1. Get Intentionally Uncomfortable. My friend and colleague, Dan Thurmon, calls this, “Off balance, on purpose.” Change and discomfort are a natural process of life, so why not train in it? In reality, our bodies are made up of mostly water, and stale, stagnant water doesn’t smell so pretty. The great news here is that getting intentionally uncomfortable in your non-work life has a very positive impact on your work life. So pick something and go for it. Here are a few different areas to chose discomfort:
   • Sports
   • Languages
   • Certifications
   • Networking, or events
   • Writing, speaking, or other skills
   • Taking on a project you have no idea how to do
   • New job, new industry, new responsibilities
   • Raising funds
2. Take Note. One of my greatest mentors, Jim Rohn, used to say, “Don’t just get through the day, get from the day.” The best way to get from the day is to keep a journal, and take note of what you learn during the day. Knowing that you ultimately need to write something in that slot, you’ll find yourself paying close attention to what you’re learning. Here are three great headings to journal on:

• Gratitude—what happened in the day that you’re grateful for?
• My Qualities—list the positive qualities that you exhibited in that day. (I.e. good writer, generous, kind, thoughtful, etc).
• Learning—what did you learn about yourself (i.e. I don’t like to let go of control, I cannot help but coach, I laugh loud, I love learning about food and nutrition), and/or what did you learn from your experiences (i.e. coal and charcoal are not of the same material, my shoulders hurts because they are rotated forward—out of socket—and the exercises help pull them back into proper positioning.) If you get to the end of the day without learning something new, jump on TedTalks.

3. Just as you would study any new software to find out how it works, study yourself to find out what’s working and what needs to change so you can get the results you want. A great way to do this is by reading your journal entries at the end of the week.

 

Don’t just get through life—get from it. Keep growing, keep learning, and keep challenging yourself to do what you never thought possible. In the process, you will undoubtedly provoke others to step into their greatness.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

  

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address where it says “Subscribe”, and press “Submit.”

 

 

 

The Truth About Leadership (Executive) Presence: An Interview With John Baldoni

 

I came across John Baldoni’s work through social media. His passion, knowledge, and first-hand experience with leadership is inspiring… and immediately useful.

 

John is the author of more than a dozen books, including MOXIE: The Secret to Bold and Gutsy Leadership, Lead with Purpose, Lead Your Boss… and so many more. He’s an internationally recognized leadership educator, executive coach and speaks throughout North America and Europe.

 

In 2015 Trust Across America named him to its list of top 100 most trustworthy business experts for the second consecutive year. In 2014 Inc.com listed John as a Top 50 leadership expert and Top 100 leadership speaker.

 

During this interview, John shares valuable insights and specific steps to addressing the following topics:

 

•  Driving fear out of the organization
•  Strengthening your leadership (executive) presence
•  Increasing your self-confidence and instilling it in others
•  And, finally, he shares the #1 challenge he has helped leaders overcome in the 20+ years he’s been doing this work. Hint: Time.

 

You can learn more about John, and gain access to his videos, blogs, newsletter, etc, here.

 

Thank you, John! You are remarkable, and I’m grateful I had the chance to learn from you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

The Truth About Leadership (Executive) Presence: An Interview With John Baldoni

 

I came across John Baldoni’s work through social media. His passion, knowledge, and first-hand experience with leadership is inspiring… and immediately useful.

 

John is the author of more than a dozen books, including MOXIE: The Secret to Bold and Gutsy Leadership, Lead with Purpose, Lead Your Boss… and so many more. He’s an internationally recognized leadership educator, executive coach and speaks throughout North America and Europe.

 

In 2015 Trust Across America named him to its list of top 100 most trustworthy business experts for the second consecutive year. In 2014 Inc.com listed John as a Top 50 leadership expert and Top 100 leadership speaker.

 

During this interview, John shares valuable insights and specific steps to addressing the following topics:

 

•  Driving fear out of the organization
•  Strengthening your leadership (executive) presence
•  Increasing your self-confidence and instilling it in others
•  And, finally, he shares the #1 challenge he has helped leaders overcome in the 20+ years he’s been doing this work. Hint: Time.

 

You can learn more about John, and gain access to his videos, blogs, newsletter, etc, here.

 

Thank you, John! You are remarkable, and I’m grateful I had the chance to learn from you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

Imagine the power inherent in knowing how to cash in on the value of your life experiences. While I did buy a lottery ticket ($1.5 billion—who wouldn’t), the greatest winnings I’ve accumulated have little to do with paper (tickets or Benjamin’s).

 

In reality, the odds are stacked heavily against the $1.5 billion Powerball winner. And unfortunately, no dollar amount can buy a deep seeded belief in oneself, nor the courage to risk the vulnerability necessary to reach for your greatness.    

 

How To Stop Pretending & Profit From Your Passion

 

I felt dread course through my body as I wondered, “Is she okay? Is this moment going to stop her from singing forever? I hope not.”

 

Just moments before, I’d watched Korin Bukowski, not once, but twice forget the words to, “Try,” as she sang live on The Voice. She has probably sung that song a million times. What happened?  By the grace of God, she managed to make her way through the song, and hold herself together as the judges—and Carson Dailey—did their best to console her.   

 

“There isn’t a judge up here who hasn’t forgotten their lyrics,” Blake Shelton said, as he encouraged the American public to vote for Korin to continue in the competition by using their “instant save” capability.  And even though she wasn’t saved that time, she was instantly connected to the public in a powerful way. Anyone who’s ever made a mistake in public could relate.

 

As she walked off the stage, I couldn’t make sense of the intensity of my own emotions. I wasn’t the one singing live on The Voice, but somehow the feelings were intimately familiar. Try as I might to forget about Korin’s performance, the scene continued to replay, and so did the emotions. Busying myself by inhaling gobs of chocolate and exercising like crazy didn’t seem to stop the persistent nagging brought on by the event.

 

Clearly what happened to her had triggered something in me, but I didn’t know what it was. And honestly, I found it a whole lot easier to talk and think about her mistake than dredge up my old stuff.   So, I refocused myself on my work and prepared to interview Rich Sheridan, CEO and co-Founder of Menlo Innovations, a software company in Ann Arbor, MI, that has won numerous awards for the profound impact it has made in the world.

 

Toward the end of the interview, I asked Rich, “What’s the greatest challenge you see leaders facing globally?”

 

“Changing human behavior,” Rich said, almost as if a solution to such a universal challenge was simple.

 

But he was right.  Regardless of title or level of success, changing our own behaviors (or the behavior of others) is difficult. It’s the reason we buy hordes of books on dieting, exercise, and wealth, attend self-improvement workshops, and engage in team-building seminars with our co-workers.

 

“Give our listeners one step they can take to change human behavior on their team,” I asked Rich.

 

His answer to this question changed my life.

 

Four simple words—“Watch what you reward,” Rich said, “And I’m not talking about money, though that is one. When you talk about how ‘busy’ you are all the time, you’re rewarding ‘busy.’”

 

Parents unconsciously reward a whole host of behaviors in their children that drive them crazy, like whining, begging, and interrupting, just to name a few. What you put your attention to—i.e., reward—grows. I know this not because I have children, but because I still drive my parents crazy.   

 

Curious about my own results, I headed out for my normal evening walk, asking myself, “What am I rewarding?”

 

Digging a little deeper, I asked, “What are the results I’m creating? And what are my ‘Payoffs’ (another word Rich used to further identify what he was referring to) for getting these results?”

 

Of course, my mind naturally went to my results, which are typically the opposite of what I want. Results that drive me crazy, and leave me feeling frustrated. Results like:

 

• Exhaustion from spending hours recording one two-minute video,
• Then over-eating, which probably causes…
• Persistent pain in various joints, and constant soreness from over-exercising.
• And then, the most painful -- random and few opportunities (over the past five years) to share my talent.

 

That last one feels like lead in my stomach.

 

I love this work.  

 

So, what gives? Why have I thrown monkey wrenches at myself, avoiding the very opportunities where I can contribute the most?  That’s when it hit me. Monkey wrenches and joint pain are less painful than dealing with people—that’s why.

 

“Am I afraid of people?” I asked myself, wondering if I should check myself into… the grocery store to get more chocolate.

 

While in the Trader Joes checkout line—chocolate in tow, I struck up this awesome conversation with an older couple who had just finished a hike. We exchanged contact info, and soon we’ll be on a hike together.

 

Clearly, I’m not afraid of all people, I realized. So, who is it, and why?

 

“People with suits,” I decided, “The fancier the suit, the more chocolate I consume.”

 

That’s it—scary people in suits are to blame. If we could just rid the universe of suits, then my shoulders, knees, and lower back would be in such better shape! Abolish the suits!

 

Later that week I struck up a meaningful conversation with a gentleman in a sharp looking suit at Starbucks. He was in Baltimore seeking additional venture capital for his tech start up. Thinking I may know someone I could introduce him to, I probed a little deeper, asking about why he started this business, how many employees he had, and who he was pitching.

 

Considering he had already raised several million dollars, I was surprised by his response. “I’ve been working sixteen-hour-days and I have a couple of full time people,” he said, as he pulled out a beautifully bound notebook, along with a few flyers, detailing his product and his plan.

 

“I’m not a graphic designer, but I put these together.”

 

Still not understanding why this product mattered to him, I asked about his history. Essentially, I wanted to understand how he made his way into caring enough about this product to start a business around it.

 

“I was raised in a mobile home,” he shared.

 

Considering the product he was seeking venture capital for had nothing to do with mobile homes, I was confused.

 

“Why does it matter that you grew up in a trailer park?”

 

“I’m a hard worker.”

 

“Your results speak for themselves. You don’t need anyone to take pity on you, and offer you a chance because of where you come from. Share your passion for the product, the excitement of your current investors, and your plan,” I responded.

 

Interestingly, he spent the next twenty minutes telling me about how he bought that trailer park, and sold it for a sizeable profit several years ago.

 

“Now that’s inspiring! Tell your story that way,” I said, astounded by his journey and courageous spirit. “In fact,” I suggested, “Show those investors how you took every one of your challenges, and turned them into opportunities. It’s you, your stories, and your passion that will not only attract the right investors, but also inspire others (employees, suppliers, etc.) to help you make this one a big success.

 

“Thank you,” he said, as we hugged before parting.  

 

  

 

“Clearly it’s not the suits,” I thought as Morgan, my physical therapist, tortured me with a new needling technique that’s supposed to aid in rapid healing.  “It’s not people, it’s not suits, and it’s not people in suits that are stopping me from doing this work. So, what is it?”

 

Two recent events flooded my mind as I thought about the recent wave of emotions I’d experienced after Korin’s performance.  The first was about a speech I gave to NASA, and the other was a conversation I had with a new friend.

 

NASA, Twitter, Shit!

 

I was invited to give a speech about generational differences at NASA’S first information technology summit.  Determined to make my mark and set myself up for a lifetime of guaranteed success, I abandoned my normal speech preparations, hired a speechwriter, an expert in PowerPoint®, and proceeded to memorize a forty-minute speech.

 

Forcing myself into my basement for two hours every day, locking in the speech word-for-word was exhausting, but necessary. No way was I going to take a chance on this audience. This was NASA—it had to be perfect.

 

You know how the story ends already, right?

 

All my hard work pays off, and I get a standing ovation.

 

Heeellllloooo ego!

 

Alas, I had no time to contemplate the role of my ego in this speech.

 

“Focus, Misti,” I repeated to myself in that basement, as my mind wandered and a giant force inside of me just wanted to go outside and play.

 

I stayed. I focused. I memorized. Every day for six months.

 

One might think that such persistence would aid in confidence and calmness in the days and nights leading up to the speech.

 

Nada. It didn’t help at all. Zilch!

 

Xanax, or some stronger equivalent, please?

 

The morning of my speech I was in a haze as I made my way into the auditorium where I was set to speak in just a couple of hours. I sat on the stage, visualizing my applause.

 

That’s what you’re supposed to do right—see the ball going into the hoop?

 

In truth, all I saw was gray. But, to the event planners such preparations looked good, right? They could see how much effort I was putting into this speech, right?

 

Mostly, I wanted Linda Cureton, the chief information officer of NASA, a woman I respected greatly, to be impressed. I wasn’t a well-established or polished keynote speaker, and I knew she was taking a risk on me. She believed in me, and I needed to wow her.

 

When the time came, I stepped onto the stage, had a good opening line, and then completely forgot my speech. Gone. The words I’d spent hours storing in my memory were inaccessible, and I could see the discomfort rising on their faces as I struggled.

 

It wasn’t pretty, but I found my way through that speech—much the same as Korin made her way through that song. After I came off the stage, Linda looked at me and quietly asked, “What happened?” Embarrassed, all I could muster was, “I don’t know.”

 

Unfortunately, my failure wasn’t over when I walked off the stage.  As it turned out, I was the lucky one to speak right before Vince Cerf, widely known as “The founder of the Internet,” and one heck of a speaker. The event was webcast live, and so you can imagine the number of people getting through me in order to listen to Vince speak. 

 

I don’t know the exact number, but it was a LOT… of important people. In suits. Watching me fail, miserably. And then tweeting about it.  I wish I could tell you that I read the tweets about my speech, but honestly I couldn’t bear to think about how awful they probably were.  But I did hear about them from other sources.

 

“Never again!” I thought to myself. “Clearly, they can see that I’m clueless and have nothing of value to add anyway, so why bother?”  For the psychologists out there, yes, I internalized the experience—I was a failure. I didn’t just have a failure. I was the failure.  

 

That day, I made a decision—I will never let that happen to me again.

 

I needed training, and so I invested—heavily. I spent hours, days, and months writing and re-writing stories, exhausted and annoyed at my inability to get it perfect.   Of course, the stories could have been perfect had I actually used them in a speech. But what speech? My phone wasn’t ringing, and I couldn’t get myself to drum up opportunities. Networking events further exhausted me.

 

I cringed when people asked, “What do you do?”

 

“I sit at home, looking busy, wishing someone would show up, sprinkle magic fairy dust on me, and tell me exactly how to… be Elizabeth Gilbert, Simon Sinek, or Daniel Pink,” was the truth I was unwilling to share.

 

They were perfect. Their messages resonated with my passion. Can’t I just be one of them?  Of course not—the job is taken!  So, I went back to work on perfecting my stories, just like I’d learned in that training. 

 

How does anyone continue to do their work when they fail so publicly?  I haven’t figured it out yet, but I did get a glimpse into the real reason for my failure, and it wasn’t at all what I thought it was. It wasn’t about being smart enough, polished enough, or even a good speaker.

 

Dread Locks, Mocha Skin, and 2Pac

 

“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.” – Brene Brown

 

The truth came to me through a story my friend Aisha shared as we sat in an Indian restaurant in Baltimore, Maryland.  Heralding from Queens, New York, and also a veteran, Aisha recounted her experience of the first time she felt the suffocating impact of having mocha skin and dreadlocks. 

 

As one of few black women stationed in Kentucky, Aisha had no idea how to fit in. Fitting in meant she’d need to actually enjoy country music. Desperate to figure it out, she started watching a fellow mocha-skinned officer who was well respected despite the fact that he drove around base in his Lexus, with spinning rims, and blaring 2Pac.

 

“How do I do this?” Aisha asked him.

 

“You’re the one making a big deal of your skin—they don’t care. Tell your jokes, just like you’d tell them to me,” he said.  

 

“They did laugh, Misti,” Aisha told me, “and I realized that all I needed to do was be me.”

 

That’s it, I realized on my drive home.

 

The day I accepted the opportunity to speak for NASA, I abandoned myself. Much the same as Aisha, I didn’t believe this audience would ever want to hear from a woman who spent seventh and eighth grade in special education class.

 

Why would such a prestigious group of professionals care to learn from a woman who barely graduated from high school, and was incredibly lucky to get her education from a university few have heard of?  They wouldn’t, which is exactly why I had a very smart woman write and perfect my speech, and another one design and perfect my slides. 

 

Then I remembered what Linda said to me in the hallway moments after I delivered that terrible speech.

 

“Misti, you have a story, and you need to tell it,” she said, quite publicly, and continued on with the conversations she was having about the upcoming sessions.

 

Since then, I’ve come to realize that it’s not so much about sharing my story as it is about trusting in my story. Just as it’s difficult to hear the voice of a singer riddled with self-doubt, it’s nearly impossible to connect with an audience I never showed up for.   

 

So, how do I do it? How do I risk the possibility of failure every day as I share the gifts God has given me with the people in the suits?

 

Do I find a way to crush my amygdala, the part of my brain that quietly—without my permission—tells my whole body that I’m about to die when all I’m doing is standing on a stage sharing stories?

 

Do I stay in hiding, praying that one day I’ll have the perfect story (history), and then I can share? As if changing my background were even possible, or desirable.

 

Or, do I recognize my intense fear as a gift from God, reminding me that all I need to do is breathe—slowly and deeply—and be me.

 

I wonder what would happen if I started rewarding, as Rich so eloquently taught me, showing up, trusting in my instincts, and sharing what I have to offer.  What would it mean to reward total transparency, trust, and truth? What would happen if I could find a way to reward the kind of risk-taking Aisha took?

 

What would my body feel like if I rewarded authenticity, instead of trying to control the actions and thoughts of others—a game I can never win anyway—and started showing up, offering, and watching God work her magic.

 

My guess is—I’ll have the same experience of pure bliss I had at the Starbucks that day with the entrepreneur in the fancy suit, who, turns out, helped me remember that all I need to do is share my story, my results, my process, and my passion. The right people (and audiences) will come at the right time to help us share our gifts—if we will only trust in our own stories.   

 

Imagine if they had a Powerball that resulted in such trust. Would you play? I will!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get In-Depth Techniques for Living and Provoking Greatness, click here, type in your email address, and press “Submit.”

 

The first time I met Ari was through his book, Zingerman's Guide to Good Leading, Part 2; A Lapsed Anarchist's Approach to Being a Better Leader. 

 

After underlining, circling, and writing all over the inside of his book, I couldn’t help but reach out and personally thank him for writing such an exceptional book.

 

I wanted to hug him then, but alas I had to wait a couple of years before I could give him a virtual hug through this podcast.

 

Throughout this podcast interview, Ari outlines critical elements to gaining the diversity and creativity that comes with a fully engaged team. He distinguishes between “shaming” your staff, and providing “creative consequences.”

 

His approach is simple and incredibly powerful. Naturally, they also require discipline, which Ari and I talk about during this interview.

 

The basic concept of discipline that we’re referring to is not much different from the daily decision to go for an apple verses a Hershey’s bar for nutrients. The obvious choice for health purposes is an apple, but for many of us (myself included) that chocolate is more tasty.

 

Ari also talks about the 12 Natural Laws of Business, which he agreed to share with you here, for free. They are also in his book on leadership mentioned above – get the book, you’ll be so glad you did!

 

Many (and more) of the stats Ari referenced during our interview are both in the book, and noted below. Enjoy!

 

Thank you for giving me the great privilege of interviewing you, Ari. I hope to do so again in the near future!

 

About Ari Weinzweig:

 

He is CEO and co-founding partner of Zingerman's Community of Businesses, which includes Zingerman's Delicatessen, Bakehouse, Creamery, Catering, Mail Order, ZingTrain, Coffee Company, Roadhouse, Candy Manufactory and the newest business—Cornman Farms. To learn more about Ari and Zingerman’s history, go here.

 

To order some of the most delicious food on the planet (the holiday are upon us), go here.

 

Stats (taken from, Zingerman's Guide to Good Leading, Part 2; A Lapsed Anarchist's Approach to Being a Better Leader):

 

Take a look at this data from a Harris Poll cited in Dean Tucker’s great book, Using the Power of Purpose. Of those surveyed:

 

Only 37 percent of employees clearly knew the company’s goals;

Only 20 percent were enthusiastic about those goals;

Only 20 percent saw how they could support those goals;

Only 15 percent felt enabled to work towards them;

Only 20 percent fully trusted the company they worked for.

 

Thank you, Ari! You are remarkable, and I’m grateful I had the chance to learn from you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

 

From kid programmer in 1971 to Forbes cover story in 2003, Richard Sheridan, author of Joy, Inc., has gone beyond creating a joyful company culture to teaching leaders around the globe how to do it.

 

While it’s easy to think such valuable company environments are created through a simple step-by-step process, Rich shares the real story behind Menlo Innovations, a company he co-founded along with James Goebel.

 

The foundation to this great story lies in the challenge of releasing the need to be the hero, and creating an environment that allows all team members to not only contribute, but take necessary breaks along the way. We all have egos that thrive on the opportunity to be the savior, and Rich is no different.

 

During the interview, Rich shared a few of the strategies he uses in order to fight off the instinct to be the hero:

 

•        Learn to manage without fear. While fear was his primary motivator prior to starting Menlo, Rich now teaches leaders around the globe to intentionally create a safe space for trust, creativity and collaboration to emerge. When we are in a state of fear (widely used to motivate), we do not have access to our pre-frontal cortex, thus we lose access to creativity, innovation, and rational thought.
•        Eliminate ambiguity. At Menlo they use a paper system that makes it crystal clear where every project is, and what each team is working on. Every day, everyone at Menlo knows what they’re working on, and the progress they’re making. So valuable! To get greater insight into the process they use, grab your copy of Joy, Inc.
•        Shared vision and belief system. At the foundation of Menlo’s success is their dedication to clear communication regarding who they serve and why they serve them. As a user of software, I am grateful for their mission at Menlo: To end human suffering as it relates to software. We all want software that’s simple, easy to use, and increases our efficiency—at Menlo, they’re creating such software.
•        Make the shift from “Boss” to “Leader.” There’s a false sense of power that comes with a corner office, an increase in direct reports, and a title. “Leadership is really about influence,” Rich says, and there’s really only one way to know if you’re leading—look behind you. Is there anyone following?

 

When I asked Rich to share the greatest challenge he sees for leaders who are striving to create a joyful, innovative, generous, and highly successful company culture, he said, “Changing human behavior.”

 

The strategy with the greatest impact for that challenge is to examine thoroughly how you reward your team. “I don’t just mean financially,” Rich said, “But in all ways. Talking about how ‘busy’ you are is a great example of how leaders reward ‘busy.’”

 

If you’re ready for a whole lot of “ah ha’s” as it pertains to influence, Provoking Greatness, and leadership, listen in. And, remember: Generosity is at the center of greatness—please share this interview.

 

To learn more about Rich, and Menlo Innovations, click here.

 

I hope that one day all leaders adopt your philosophy, Rich—Thank you for sharing the gift of you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

Nearly everyone wants to achieve greatness—results they care deeply about.

 Few do. Why?

There is no simple answer to that question, but there is a simple 4-step formula that is certain to set you up for the best year of your life. 

Here are the top 4 elements I discuss in the video above: 

1. Go for Greatness. Avoid “familiarity” and go for “Meaningful.”
2. Get specific. How do you know when you’ve reached your goal?
3. Know Often, we set goals that don’t really matter to us—focus all your energy and attention on the ones that do matter to you.
4. Celebrate your successes (big and small). Success—happiness, really—is in the process, not the product. 

I’m excited to hear your goals, and delighted to do what I can to help you achieve Greatness throughout 2016, and beyond! 

Here’s to Your Greatness, 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. When you email me your top 3 goals for 2016, you will get a complementary e-copy of Provoking Greatness. Email: MB@MeasurableGreatness.com

Should you fire talented employees who frequently turn work in late and call in sick? If you could just get them to start working on projects sooner, they wouldn’t have to overexert themselves, wind up sick, and miss another deadline.

 

How about the ones who hoard information and don’t play well with others? Don’t they understand that the company’s success depends on a team effort?

 

Of course, there are many reasons to fire an employee, but don’t make the same mistake Gale almost did.

 

Sitting across from Gale, I listened as she shared a story about Tammy, a young woman she hired nearly two years earlier.

 

“She was probably at the top of her class in college—she’s smart, but we can’t seem to get her to complete projects in a timely manner. I think it’s a cultural thing,” Gale, the CEO of a well-established company, said.

 

“What do you mean by a ‘cultural thing?’” I asked.

 

“She’s from _____ (another country), and that must be the way they do things in that culture. She’s probably also still doing what college kids do—wait till the last minute, and then pull an all-nighter.”

 

“Is she getting the work done on time?”

 

“No, and the team thinks we need to let her go. If she can’t get the work done on time, and she’s out sick constantly, we can’t have her on staff,” Gale said.

 

At this point, I had a clear understanding of the critical mistakes Tammy was making, and I could see why Gale was struggling. Tammy also adds value, knows the company, and cares about the end product.

 

“Have you or anyone on your team ever given her this kind of feedback?” I asked.

 

“No,” Gale said, with an inquisitive look on her face.

 

“Do you know her future goals?” I asked.

 

“When Tammy first came to the company, she wanted to do the work she’s currently doing.”

 

I suggested she get the answers to these questions before giving her feedback:

 

1. How are things going for you here? (Listen intently. Then, without defensiveness, repeat back what you heard to make sure you got it. Take notes.)
2. Do you have the skills you need to do your job successfully every time? (Listen, and take notes).
3. Are you meeting the people you hoped to meet, developing the skills you hoped to develop, and enjoying your experience here? If not, how can I help? (Listen, and take notes. Stay focused on listening.)
4. If you closed your eyes right now, and it was suddenly three years down the road, what would you like to be able to say you did? What skills, experiences, and connections would you like to acquire in the next six months? (Listen, and take lots of notes. Even “I don’t know” is worth noting. Follow it up with, “If you did know…”)
5. What do you do exceptionally well in your current role? Where do you struggle the most and why? (Please… Listen, and take notes. Assumptions kill these conversations.)

 

Once you’ve had this conversation authentically, you’ll know what you need to do to help employees succeed in their career.

 

For Gale, that may mean helping her find an opportunity with another employer. Or, Tammy may respond positively to the wake-up call and start completing her work on time.

 

After going through the questions above, you’ll have the foundation of trust necessary to provide guidance that gets results. Here are the three most critical elements to giving constructive feedback: consistently seek it (receiving teaches you how to give generously), timeliness (providing feedback as close to the problematic moment as possible builds trust), and specificity (what you did, and what you could do differently).

 

Whatever you do, don’t fire someone until you 1) know the answers to those questions, 2) help them advance in their career, and 3) share your own future aspirations and challenges. This is the good stuff of any relationship.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type in your email address, and press “Submit.”

 

Moments after I hung up the phone, my mind started racing, my stomach tightened, and I had to go for a walk.

 

“You just threw that opportunity away, Misti! And—it was perfect,” the voice inside my head screamed.

 

One week earlier, I had received a phone call from Bill, a guy in charge of booking speakers at an event for executives of a company that values professional development.

 

They had already interviewed several speakers, and they offered the opportunity to me. Every element of this opportunity was perfect for me—except for one. They wanted me to speak for 4 hours, instead of the 60-90 minutes I was accustomed to at the time.

 

“I haven’t done this before on this topic, Bill. I’m not sure how I will fill 4 hours,” I said, panicking about signing the contract.

 

“Your message resonates perfectly with what we need. I’m happy to help you structure your content to ensure success with this group,” Bill generously offered, as I continued to panic.

 

“I’ll do it, Bill, but you need to know that I’m scared.”

 

Fifteen minutes later, I got a phone call informing me that they were going with another speaker.

 

“When I heard you say ‘I’m scared,’ I knew this was a bad fit,” Bill said. I felt relieved, but I knew I wasn’t off the hook.

 

The barrage of mental beatings going on inside my head let me know it was time for me to pause, write in my journal, and learn from this experience. In essence, I had just sabotaged an opportunity to do the work I’m meant to do—work that I’ve been preparing to do for more than a decade.

 

Have you ever unintentionally (or subconsciously) destroyed an opportunity to do work you care about? What did you do afterward?

 

Here’s what I did:

 

• Wrote down every reason I didn’t think I was ready for the opportunity.
• Created a list of skills I needed to work on, experience I needed to get, and documents I needed to put in place to ensure I’d be ready next time.
• Shared the list with my coach and got her support in prioritizing it.
• Created blocks of time in my schedule to address each of the items on the list.
• Started working on the list, chipping away at the items one at a time.
• Asked myself what else I needed to do to attract more opportunities. The list is never-ending, and having a coach who helps prioritize it is incredibly valuable. Thank you, Jane!

 

Rather than ignore the onslaught of negative thoughts banging around inside your head, listen in, take note, and say, “Thank you!” Then, create your list, share it with your coach, and get to work on it.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. No, exploring negative thoughts isn’t fun. But if you ignore them, they’ll lead to an ulcer, a heart attack, high blood pressure, or some other physical ailment that keeps the pharmaceutical companies thriving. Let’s keep your greatness thriving instead.

 

I had the rare chance to listen to Dr. Mario Livio speak at TEDx Midatlantic. His message was inspiring and interesting – check it out here.

 

After his speech, I met him in the hallway, grabbed coffee with Mario and his wonderful wife, and learned that he lives right around the corner from me.

 

Since then, I devoured his most recent New York Times best selling book, Brilliant Blunders. It’s excellent – grab your copy today!

 

I was delighted when he agreed to be on your Provoking Your Greatness podcast. While he shares many insights to instigating creativity and innovation, and also shared the top three strategies to reaching (and provoking) greatness. Here they are:

 

1.     Stay Curious. We had some lively discussion on what it means to be curious, and how to stay curious.
2.     Follow Your Curiosity. Listen in to learn more details on how to do this.
3.     Invest in Your Interests. This is to say, feed your passion.

 

Dr. Mario Livio is an internationally renowned astrophysicist, who has worked for 24 years with the Hubble Space Telescope.

 

He is a Fellow of the American Association for the Advancement of Science.

 

He has published more than 400 scientific papers on topics ranging from Dark Energy and cosmology to black holes and extrasolar planets.

 

Dr Livio is also the author of five popular science books, including "The Golden Ratio" (a National Bestseller for which he received the "Peano Prize" and the "International Pythagoras Prize") and "Is God A Mathematician?" Livio's recent book, "Brilliant Blunders", was on the Bestsellers List of the New York Times, and was selected by the Washington Post as one of the "2013 Best Books of the Year."

To learn more about Mario, go here.

 

To connect directly, go here, of simply email Mario here: dr.mario.livio@gmail.com.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness, Dr. Mario Livio!

 

Thank you,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year.

 

Of course, that’s not because of the story of the Pilgrims and Indians. In fact, I’m embarrassed to tell you that I didn’t know what a Pilgrim was until roughly ten years ago.

 

“Misti, I slept through most of social studies class in school, but over the years and repetition, I at least picked up some history,” one friend said, after I honestly asked, “What’s a Pilgrim?”

 

Truthfully, I’d heard the word, and I even had visuals of a giant table with lots of food on it. I liked that part, a lot! But, I didn’t understand the story, or the truth of the history.

 

Turns out, neither did my friend.

 

Slowly, over time, we started reading books like Mayflower, and visiting places like Plymouth, Massachusetts, and learning about our history.

 

Over time, I’ve learned a ton about history, but most importantly, I’ve learned the real significance of #Thanksgiving.

 

The real meaning in this magical holiday, where we get to devour our favorite delectables, is in the act of giving thanks. And, I have much to be grateful for.

 

My friend, for one, who didn’t disown me when she found out I didn’t know what a Pilgrim was. And then dove into the research with me—what a gift!

 

When I think about the many people and experiences I am deeply grateful for, I feel this overwhelming desired to go hug a thousand people—at least—and say, “Thank you for being you.”

 

Maybe I’ll make that one of my top goals for 2016. Done!

 

Speaking of goals, this year, I wanted to give you something super special, and valuable. Since one of the top questions I get is, “How do I step into (or encourage others to their) my greatness,” I put together a comprehensive, yet brief, training on this very topic.

The following are 7 simple ways to say Thank You to your team this year, and all throughout 2016:

 

1. Pause, and write your list of the specific qualities you’re authentically grateful for in each team member. Are they excellent with excel, public speaking, or maybe negotiating? Rather than simply say, “I appreciate you, or Thank you,” get specific.
2. Gift cards are made even more special when the card you give has meaning. One of my teammates loves the outdoors, talks about shopping at REI, and so a gift card was the perfect for her. What about your team? Don’t know? If you don’t, no worries, just ask. Listening to their interests is generous, and will leave them appreciating your gift even more.
3. Hand written notes are rare, and therefore even more valuable. If you have hundreds of employees, colleagues, or team members, perhaps handwriting all your cards isn’t practical. But, you can personalize (put a favorite quote, poem, or story) one card, and write a brief message for the most important people inside each card. Vista Print is a great option for these cards, and so is Send Out Cards (they actually mail all your cards for you too—simply upload your contacts once, and bam).
4. Take your team to lunch and verbally thank each of them for their unique contribution. Remember the importance of “specific” when acknowledging each person. “I appreciate you for your awesomeness,” isn’t quite as strong as, “All year I’ve watched you run hard at learning the latest and greatest marketing strategies on social media, and I appreciate all you’ve done.”
5. Celebrate your accomplishments. Make note of all the small achievements your team made in 2015, and be sure to let them know that it would not be possible without their efforts. While it’s best to do this in person, you can also do it on the web, email, and even a blog.
6. Make them something they’ll enjoy. There’s nothing quite like a handmade gift. One client gave jewelry she made, another found a recipe for sweets that fit her employees restricted diet, and delivered them to her. So generous! The great news is that you don’t necessarily have to be the one to make the gift. Simply finding a vender that sells the sweets her employee could eat was incredibly thoughtful and generous. Have fun with this! Giving myself the time to write a poem was the gift I gave to many friends and clients. I included it below, for your enjoyment.
7. Offer your team a chance to share their 2016 goals. Then, help them gain clarity on why their goals are important to them, brainstorm ideas on what they may need to reach their goals, and make note of connections you can help to foster, or ways you can help them throughout the year.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. On Black Friday, I am giving away a simple, yet powerful, video training (brief) on goal setting. Be on the watch out and enjoy, leave me a comment, and share it with your community. It’s totally free. No opt-in is necessary to view, though I’d love to have you join my community.

 

P.P.S. Here’s the poem I wrote just a few weeks ago ~ enjoy!

 

Touched By Life

By Misti Burmeister

November 2, 2015

 

 

To be touched by life,

Is magic.

His life,

Soaring through me,

Always within me,

You, and the leaves.

Life is a force.

Openness,

And Gratitude,

Bring it forth.

 

 

 

Walking down the streets of Bethesda more than a decade ago, hearing the loud beeps of impatient drivers, and seeing a pedestrian nearly get run over, I thought to myself, “I’ve gotta get out of here. I don’t want to be like these people.”

 

I had quit my job a week prior, unaware of my financial situation when I resigned, and as a result had $37 to my name.  I was filled with anxiety, desperate to find a sense of belonging and wondering how I would pay my rent in a couple of weeks.

 

It was soon after that moment of despair when I heard these words for the first time: you become like the people you spend the most time with.  At the time, that someone was pretty much just me. And spending time with me was exhausting.

 

Nervously roaming from one coffee shop to the next, talking up the people at the gym, and rushing from one informational interview to the next (150 in six months), I prayed for an invitation.

 

“Someone please invite me to your home, hire me, or at least sit with me for a while,” I pleaded to the universe.

 

Six months went by, I met dozens of people but continued to struggle with “belonging”, though I would not have been able to express it that way.

 

“Surround yourself with positive people, and you’ll become like them,” I heard from motivational speakers and well-known businesspeople.

 

So, I tried it.

 

I asked for invitations, and even for mentors. I wanted them to take me by the hand and show me exactly what to do every day, how to behave, and where to spend my time so that I could become successful.

 

Of course, it never works that way, but I was invited to events and lunch meetings. Still, I struggled with my own expectations of what they should be doing to help me succeed.

 

“Why aren’t they making critical introductions for me, giving me important opportunities, and showing me how to become successful?” I asked myself, “Don’t they know that’s their job as my mentor?”

 

I didn’t understand.

 

Then, one day, I started paying more attention to people who moved me emotionally, often through small acts of kindness. Here’s one:

 

While I was at an inspiring event in DC, I noticed someone walk up to the host before the event started, hand over a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and say, “It’s already a big success. Great work.”

 

Later, I found out that person had never met the host prior to this event. The thoughtfulness and generosity of that moment inspired (and instructed) me greatly.

 

Then, I remembered a man who briefly came into my life during my time in Bethesda. His name is Bob Artz, and he came to our informational interview with an expensive set of CDs called The Goal Achiever.

 

“Listen to these,” he said, “I think they’ll help you.” I devoured that program and scraped the funds together to buy A View from the Top, which I listened to repeatedly.

 

Then there was the day I walked into Arenal, the CrossFit gym where I work out, and was approached by Ruslan, a talented trainer, who said, “Misti, you don’t seem like yourself recently. Is everything okay?”

 

No, everything wasn’t okay. I didn’t realize how much I was struggling until he asked, and then hugged me. His actions inspired (instructed) me that day.

 

Then, just last week, I had my first meeting with a woman who runs a successful non-profit here in Baltimore. During the meeting, I invited her to my book launch, which was a fundraiser for MissionFit, a new non-profit in Baltimore.

 

That night, she sent me this email…

 

I truly want to wish you the best of luck on Thursday night. I unfortunately do have a board thing that evening which prevents me from attending. I did, however, make a small gift to the organization in your name.

 

I never checked to see how much she donated—it didn’t matter. What mattered was the incredible feeling of connection and belonging I felt when I read that email. What mattered was the opportunity I had once again to be inspired, instructed, or if you prefer, mentored.

 

Beyond seeking out traditional mentors, consider how much we learn by noticing the behaviors that provoke a feeling within us. Whether the feeling is good or bad, we learn. We need to pay attention to the actions that inspire us to do more and become more.

 

There are no perfect mentors, but there are zillions of opportunities to learn from the best teachers. They’re around us every day. Can you feel them? Do you see the random acts of kindness happening around you every day?

 

Look for them. You’ll find them, I promise. They are there just waiting for you to notice.

 

Observe how these uplifting moments make you feel and then look for opportunities to imitate those actions. You won’t need anything in return. The act of generosity alone will fill you up and leave you feeling successful.

 

Interestingly, I’ve found that elusive sense of belonging most often when I share without expectation, invite others to be a part of what I’m up to, and support them in the work that’s meaningful to them.

 

Now, rather than looking for mentors I notice the ones that show up and then seek to imitate them. Do you?

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type your email address in, and click “Download Now.”

Dr. Michelle May was one of the highlights of my trip to the National Speakers Association’s Annual Convention this year. Her passion—born out of her own struggle with yo-yo dieting—is infectious. 

Through this interview, Michelle shares the most critical element of successful eating: Mindfulness. Of course, that’s a loaded word! Through the interview, you’ll gain a clear understanding of her systematic approach to learning how to eating what you love and loving what you eat. 

Michelle has trained over 500 health professionals to offer Am I Hungry? mindful eating programs. Her programs are in 20 countries. She is also the award-winning author of the book series, Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat, that teaches mindful eating to help with yo-yo dieting, diabetes, bariatric surgery, and binge eating. Her newest books in the series are for students and for athletes. 

Dr. May has been featured on the Discovery Health Channel, Dr. Oz, Oprah Radio, and quoted in Health, SELF, Redbook, WebMD, Woman’s Day, Huffington Post, and numerous other publications. Her personal success story is featured in Chicken Soup for the Dieter’s Soul. 

Grab your free chapter of Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat, along with loads of valuable resources here. Be sure to sign up for her newsletter – I’m signing up right now! 

Here’s to Your Greatness, Dr. Michelle May! 

Thank you,

 

Misti Burmeister

The hardest part about going after anything that’s meaningful is the conversation that goes on inside your head.

 

What do you tell yourself when you set an important goal, and then start to work toward it?

 

Listen in – what do you hear?

 

You will know how important your goals are based on how difficult it is to hear what the critic inside your head is saying.

 

If you have zero struggle with self-talk as you reach for your goals, you’re either not going big enough, or you simply don’t care enough.

 

The more you care, the more challenging it is to deal with your internal monologue.

 

The great news is there are proven strategies for dealing with self-talk. The following are the 3 most critical steps you can take when your inner critic (self-talk) is making it hard to breathe:  

 

1. Acknowledge the critic. Like a child who’s crying out, stop what you’re doing and actively listen. This simple act creates a great sense of calm. It brings awareness, and awareness is the most important element to shifting your results.
2. Keep the bigger picture in mind. Remind yourself of the outcome you’re striving to achieve.
3. Get (and stay) focused on the very next step. Climbing Mount Everest happens one step at a time.

 

My great friend and colleague, Vernice Armour, says, “Acknowledge the obstacles, but don’t give them power.” Sage advice!

 

Focus on reaching for greatness, notice the stories (thoughts) you are creating, and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type your email address in, and click “Download Now.”

 

You’re more talented than you know.

 

The key to reaching greatness lies in focusing on improving your PR (personal record).

 

Personal: You.

Record: Marker of success.

PR: Your marker for success.

 

One of the greatest killers of greatness lies in comparison. It’s easy to look at someone who’s perceivably more successful than you and beat yourself up because you’re, “not as good as them, so why even bother?”

 

Throughout this podcast, I share specific strategies for overcoming fear and self-doubt, which almost always begins with clarifying your “There.”

 

How do you know when you’ve gotten there—when you’ve reached success? And, why does it matter…to you?

 

Another critical component to overcoming self-doubt: self-talk. Listen in, and then shift your internal monologue from, “I’m never going to get there, to:”

 

• It’s okay, I’m okay.
• I’m rockin’ it!
• I’m going to make this.
• One step at a time.
• I just need to get through this step, and then the next. That’s it.
• I’m almost there.

 

You know the crazy on slot of negative self-talk that comes with just about any big challenge? It’s usually only there for the first portion of the challenge (I call it “the suck”), and then it disappears and you realize you’ve got this.

 

What do you say to yourself to get through the suck? My go-to is “One step at a time,” “Just this stroke (for swimming),” or “Just this video/speech/post (my work).”

 

I’m excited to hear yours!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type your email address in, and click “Download Now.”

When Lynn Rose opened up for the National Speakers Association’s National Conference this year, all my worries disappeared and I felt more present than I had in months. She was remarkable!

 

The next morning I had a chance to thank Lynn when she told me, “And to think I walked away from this industry because I just didn’t think I had what it took.”

 

I was floored! How in the world could someone as talented as Lynn Rose lose sight of her greatness? Suddenly I felt less alone, and more connected to my own greatness.

 

With that, I asked Lynn to let me interview her for your Provoking Your Greatness podcast. She agreed, and I promise you, you’re in for a treat.

 

Lynn Rose has not only opened for Jay Leno, Mariah Carey, Sheryl Crow and more and hosted countless TV shows here and internationally, she has been seen on: CBS, ABC, NBC, Entertainment Tonight, Disney, Warner Brothers, W Magazine and more, and is also a go-to Media Mentor for Experts.

 

Throughout this interview, Lynn shares about how she takes ahold of the steering wheel of her emotions and uses them to catapult her performances, her business, and her clients businesses.

 

Too often we tend to want to stifle or shut down how we feel when it’s not immediately happy or fun. As Lynn so beautifully shared, to rise to her greatness, she's had to learn the importance of releasing resistance and allow all emotions to surface.

 

She even shared how she has used anger, resentment, sadness and other challenging emotions to come together to help drive passion and connection in her performances, and as a fire to help expand her business.

 

 

 

She does the same with speakers, leaders, authors, and many others that she serves too! In fact, she gave me some valuable live coaching toward the end of the interview. Of course, the lessons she helped me work through are applicable to all of us, so be sure to listen in and share!

 

Here are a couple links Lynn references during the interview:

 

The Peaceful Warrior, by Dan Millman

 

The Future of LiveStreaming & Business, (Periscope and Blab.im) click here.  

 

“Ultimately,” Lynn says, “It’s difficult to see what’s on the outside of the label when you’re inside the jar.” Having a coach/mentor help you see your greatness is incredibly valuable.

 

Get access to Lynn’s “Launch You Now Success FREE Training,” click here.

 

Visit LynnRose.com to get tons of valuable information, and be sure to sign up for her song, "Stand Up" about standing in your power, her “Visionary process” and other freebies for you.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

Many people have accidently provoked greatness, but most leaders want to know what it takes to get others to live into their potential, on purpose.

 

“Misti, if I could take a wire, insert it into your mouth, travel it down your arms to your finger tips, we’d have a writer on our hands today,” Ms. Cays, my high school English teacher said to me.

 

“I do talk a lot,” I thought, “I wonder if I could talk with my fingers?”  

 

A writer was born that day.

 

But, that was on accident. Believe, I know – I called to thank her. She doesn’t remember saying those words. Ha!

 

Is there a way to provoke your team… into their greatness? Absolutely! But how?

 

Recently, I heard an awesome story about Gandhi that is the foundational answer to this question. Here it is:

 

“Gandhi,” a woman asked, “Will you tell my son to stop eating sugar, please?”

 

“Come back in two weeks,” Gandhi said.

 

Two weeks later, she came back and asked the same question.

 

“Stop eating sugar,” Gandhi said to the son.

 

“Why did you make me wait two weeks?” the woman asked.

 

“Because two weeks ago I was eating sugar,” Gandhi said.

 

So perfect!

 

This story gets to the heart of Gandhi’s famous saying, “Be the change you wish to see.” We must be willing to set big goals, run after them, and share our journey (successes and failures) if we want to provoke greatness in others.

 

Listen in for more specifics about how to provoke greatness, in yourself and others.

 

Are you reaching for your greatness? What are your goals, and how can I help you get there?

 

Here’s To Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to Get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type your email address in, and submit "Download Now."

Ever met an impatient employee, who wants to “do meaningful work?” Or, “Work they enjoy doing?” What did you do with them?

 

The CEO at the first company I worked for responded to my pleas with, “Misti, what did your parents do to deal with you? It’s clear you have problems with anxiety. Do you take medication for that?”

 

It worked!

 

I quit.

 

And then I became insanely curious. I needed to understand what I said, or did, that was getting me the opposite of the result I wanted.

 

150 informational interviews later, I started to see many themes, which correlated perfectly with the research from Harvard, Gallup, and the Center for Creative Leadership.

 

In a nugget, here’s what I discovered: we all (across generations) want the same basic things: to feel like what we do matters, some form of feedback, and opportunities for improvement.

 

Over the next dozen years, I have literally watched hundreds of leaders lose their employees because, “Their feelings are not my responsibility. I pay them to do a job!”

 

Meanwhile, companies like Zappos, Amazon, and Reston Limo are grabbing those hard workers, and helping them find opportunities to step into their greatness.

 

While the vast majority of leaders are missing out on “needy,” “impatient,” and even, “complacent” employees, the smart ones are capitalizing on these talented team members.

 

Here’s how – They help each team member:

 

1. Define a professional goal that’s meaningful to them (and valuable to the business).
2. Understand what they’re doing/not doing that contributes or distracts from their career success (feedback).
3. Remember that their contribution matters (appreciation).

 

Don’t succumb to Lazy Leadership – i.e. they should… know better, work harder, and stay engaged because I pay them to do a job.

 

Instead, look for ways to help them succeed, and I promise they will do the same for you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

P.S. For instant access to interviews, and to Get Your 3 Practical Tips for Building a Motivated Team, click here, type your email address in, and submit "Download Now."

Jane Atkinson is a powerful person, with a mission to help speakers elevate their game and transform the lives of those their audiences.

 

She’s so good that I hired her myself!

 

She’s down-to-earth, practical, and vulnerable at the same time. She brought that same level of excellence to this interview.

 

Jane has been helping speakers catapult their careers for over 20 years.  She started as an agent representing speakers and when several of them quickly went from 0 to 80 engagements per year, she became known as an influencer in the speaking industry.

 

The following are two strategies Jane talked about to get the opportunities you want, in your career, or on the stage:

 

•        Pick a lane. Decide what you want to be known for. Doing so allows you to focus on increasing your value, and becoming a category of one.
•        Create a promise statement. What’s the promise of brand you? What’s the promise your team makes to your customers?

 

Jane also shared two terrific tips of leaders preparing to speak (and speakers, of course):

 

•        Create your through line. Create, as Doug Stevenson says, a “Phrase that pays,” or a short statement that will be remembered after the speech is done. Nike did this with, “Just do it.”
•        Add stories. Make them (your audience, and the people in your stories) the heroes of these stories. We tend to remember stories, and the points associated with them – share yours!

 

Jane’s books, “The Wealthy Speaker 2.0”, has been called “the bible” of the speaking industry and her follow up book “The Epic Keynote:  Presentation Skills and Styles of Wealthy Speakers” is available now.

 

Click here to learn more about Jane and get your free Wednesday tips.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

My heart was pounding as we pulled into the parking lot where they had just begun setting up for the big event at High Tide Farm, located directly across the bay from Gibson Island in Maryland. As the aroma of horse dung hit my nose, I took a deep breath and said a silent prayer.

 

I felt the breeze and remembered the email I received the night before:

 

Conditions will be a factor; see the below latest forecast from NOAA. (North winds 10 to 15 KT, with gusts to 25 KT. Waves 3 foot.) Please call or text me if you’d rather not proceed with the swim tomorrow.

 

I had just learned to swim roughly one year before, and had never come close to swimming 5 miles, much less in the open water, with choppy conditions. But, I had stuck to the training.

 

I signed my waiver, grabbed my timing chip and t-shirt, and headed off to make a pit stop before scoffing down my breakfast, which consisted of gobs of sautéed sweet potatoes and a couple of eggs.

 

Moments later, I was getting out of a minivan at the starting line. At 6:30am, it was still dark, and the wind continued to pick up as the shuttle made its rounds. By 6:50am, the swimmers were suited up, and their kayakers were putting their boats in the water.

 

Kayakers are responsible for spotting, ensuring we stay on course and avoid swimming into each other. They also provide food, water, and supplies such as extra goggles and swim caps. Mine also provided a bit of good humor and cheerleading.

 

As I talked with my new friend and kayaker, Bob, I noticed the waves were increasing in size, and my adrenaline started pumping faster.

 

“Will I even be able to make progress in this choppy water? This is crazy!” I thought, as I did my best to remain calm.

 

Then, Dave came over and starting asking Bob about the timing chip and start time. Realizing that Dave thought Bob was in charge of the event, I said, “Bob’s just my kayaker. He doesn’t know what’s going on.”

 

Clearly not believing me, Dave continued staring at Bob, waiting for an update on the start time. In an attempt to make the odd stranger go away, Bob, in a thick accent, smiled and said, “I speak no English.”

 

I burst into laughter, but Dave just looked confused.

 

“I from Ukraine,” Bob said, with a big smile.

 

Laughing hysterically, I walked away from them, over to a half wall, and started stretching. Bob followed me and we started chatting as I stretched.

 

Bob looked over and noticed that Dave was still looking at him. Dave was the only swimmer without a wetsuit, so maybe he was just too cold to think straight.

 

I was happy to have the comic relief, though. The laughter diminished my tension, and I was ready to get started. I prayed for the wind and waves to calm down, so that I could make it to the finish line, where my friend and neighbor, Maria Dennis, was waiting to embrace me.

 

Having battled leukemia a little over a year ago, she served as a giant inspiration for me as I trained for this swim. Throughout the process of chemotherapy, her spirit and attitude have always been strong and inspiring.

 

Having her to swim toward strengthened my spirit, as the waves pummeled me and made it nearly impossible to see Bob. After about a mile of swimming in 5-foot swells, the waves decreased by a couple of feet and the undertow picked up. I felt like I was in a washing machine.

 

After struggling to breathe, inhaling gulps of bay water, and making what felt like very little progress, I started laughing. Try as I may, I could not figure out what to do with the current or the waves.

 

In an effort to reduce the amount of water I was inhaling, I shifted to breathing only on my left side, facing Bob, which made staying on course much easier.

 

“Just keep going,” I told myself, “You’ve only been in this water for thirty minutes.” The last part was my way of keeping myself present, rather than worrying about how far I’d gone, or if I had energy in the tank to finish this swim.

 

Refusing to waste precious time on eating, I stopped only to grab a quick drink and pee—every minute counted.

 

While I didn’t know where I was in the swim (miles or time) when I saw the boat, and a lady waving her arms, I flat-out ignored her and told Bob, “Come on, let’s go.”

 

I knew she was there to pull me from the water, and I wasn’t ready to stop. I was there to finish this darn thing. Besides, Maria was at the finish line, waiting for me—I had to finish.

 

Moments later, I saw that she had gotten Bob’s attention. He immediately put his arms in the air, a signal we had agreed would let me know I needed to stop.

 

Frustrated, I stopped, and heard her say, “We need to get you on the boat and shift you ahead. We won’t make the time cutoff.”

 

I understood the rules. I knew they needed us to be out of the water within a specific time frame, but I wanted to finish.

 

As I approached the boat, I heard that they were just shifting us ahead by about ¾ of a mile so that the area could be reopened to boat traffic at the scheduled time. I would still get to finish the swim, and hug Maria.

 

About a mile away from the finish, they said, “Jump in and finish.”

 

Fear shot through me as I realized I’d have to spot for myself—something I have yet to master. In fact, I wound up doing almost double the length in my last open water swim.

 

Frustrated and uncertain, I started swimming toward kayakers, hoping they could help guide my way.

 

Then, I heard Bob saying, “Come on, let’s finish this thing.” I don’t know how he did it, but he managed to keep up with the boat.

 

At the end, a friend asked, “Are you upset that they had to shift you ahead? That you didn’t swim the full 5 miles?”

 

I said, “I showed up. I did the training, I got into that water, and I gave my very best effort. The rest was up to God.”

 

A few days later, we got an email from one of the seasoned swimmers letting us know that we swam closer to 6 or 7 miles, considering the conditions. I wonder how many times we re-swam portions of that swim!

 

On my drive home, I got a text message from Betsy, one of the original organizers of Swim Across America - Mid-Atlantic. “What’s your goal for next year?”

 

While the answer didn’t come to me right away, it is now abundantly clear that I need to face my fear and address my greatest weakness: spotting!

 

In 2016, I will swim 3 miles, without a spotter.

 

The real secret to being a great leader is dating your employees.

 

The best leaders on the planet sell us on their ideas. We flock to great brands, and the awesome leaders behind them, because we believe them when they tell us how their products will make our life (and the world) better.

 

Of course, they could never seduce us if they didn’t already know what we want. By learning what makes us tick, they position their product to solve our problems.

 

Yes, this is basically Marketing 101. But, what does it have to do with dating your employees?

 

Just like the greatest sales professionals understand the magic inherent in knowing their customers, the best leaders know their employees.

 

Great sales professionals keep a file on all their customers, and so do great leaders. They know the names of children, spouses, favorite meals, interests, and their underlying motivations. Some even know their favorite color, deep-seated fears, and their shoe size. Yes, their shoe size!

 

But why? And, seriously, what does this have to do with dating your employees?

 

By seeking to understand each individual’s aspirations, fears, and interests, great leaders position their big ideas so that their employees can overcome fears, reach their goals, and contribute to the greater vision of the team.

 

Just as world-class sales professionals go to great lengths to learn about their customers, great leaders know their team, and intentionally look for ways to help them reach their goals.

 

Great leaders understand that good employees, as with good customers, have a choice. They can choose to take their skillset and passion elsewhere, or even worse, turn in mediocre work, and speak poorly of the company and you, their boss.

 

Gallup calls these people “disengaged.” And a full 68% of the global workforce is either “not engaged” or “actively disengaged.” That’s a huge opportunity for leaders who are ready to date their employees.

 

Romantic relationships require an emotional investment—an authentic concern for the other person’s happiness. If you want them to care about you, you have to show that you care about them.

 

Pretty simple, right?

 

Then why don’t more leaders date their employees? That is, why don’t they treat the relationship as if it’s valuable, worthwhile—even cherished?

 

Building real, caring relationships means being vulnerable, which is not something we’re used to on the job. It’s easier to remain emotionally detached, simply bark orders, and ignore issues until it’s time for annual reviews.

 

Remarkable leaders sell their ideas to people they care about, in much the same way that top sales professionals connect with customers on a personal level. Just as inspiring a customer to buy from you demands a connection with the customer, getting your team to buy into your idea requires a connection.

 

Of course, it’s about more than buying into your idea. It’s about trusting that you have what it takes to lead them to a worthy goal.

 

Most leaders don’t know where they’re going (the idea they’re selling), but they want you to trust them to do the driving. Can you imagine selling a $1 billion piece of software to a company without knowing the impact it will have?

 

No way! Yet, most leaders expect their employees to give every ounce of dedication and commitment to a project without knowing why they’re working so hard. They make demands like, “Do what I’ve paid you to do,” use fear as leverage, and then wonder why the best keep leaving.

 

Consider the following questions before dating (leading) anyone:

 

1. Do I have a big idea?
2. Does my big idea inspire me?
3. Do I care about my (my teams) goals?
4. What does success look like? How will you know when we’ve reached success?
5. Do I understand the bigger impact on my career, my team, and my customers?
6. Do I care about the people I hope to motivate? Do I know what drives them?

 

If you’re already in a leadership position, and lack the answers to any of these questions, get them. Fast! The answers will undoubtedly yield you the loving relationships that will catapult your business to the next level.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister      

 

Beyond being one of the most articulate communicators on the planet, Dr. Nido Qubein is a humble leader, with a waiting line of people eager to be a part of his team.

 

He’s truly one of the most remarkable leaders I’ve ever experienced, and I’m grateful to have a chance to share some of his philosophies with you.

 

During the interview, Nido talked about:

 

•        The real secret to happiness in life: having purpose in your life. He goes into great deal on specific actions to take in order to find your purpose, which leads to passion. Passion, he says, leads to energy. Energy leads to action. Action leads to success. Success leads to significance. Significance leads to happiness.
•        The definition of an effective leader.
•        His #1 most important habit: Energy management.
•        The top 3 qualities he looks for in any new hire: #1 initiative.
•        He distinguishes between a “workers mentality,” which is what most universities are preparing students for, and an “entrepreneurs mentality.” The later of which will get you every opportunity you want.
•        “Top performers,” he says, “focus on results, while non-performers focus on excuses and complaining.”

 

This interview is packed full of valuable information – Listen in! And please share.

 

More on Dr. Qubein:

 

After coming to the U.S. as a teenager with no money and limited knowledge of English, Qubein has become an accomplished business leader, dedicated philanthropist and President of High Point University.

 

His life story is one filled with adversity and abundance. It is through the lens of his life accomplishments that one appreciates his current role as an educator, philanthropist, and passionate advocate for the development of our future leaders.

 

Dr. Qubein also serves on the boards of BB&T Bank, Great Harvest Bread Company and La-Z Boy Corporation. He has also written a dozen books and recorded scores of audio and video learning programs.

 

President Qubein has partnered with faculty and staff to forge new opportunities for HPU. Focusing on experiential education and holistic, values-based learning, graduates are prepared to live a life of both success and significance.

 

He has served as past president of the Big South Conference and teaches a class to all freshmen titled, “The President’s Seminar on Life Skills.” In the course, Dr. Qubein shares with students the habits, skills, values, and the practical intelligence that one must apply to succeed in an ever-changing world.

 

I am deeply grateful to have the opportunity to share this interview with you – Enjoy!

 

To learn more about Dr. Qubein and High Point University, click here.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

This article—Rethinking Work—was just released by The New York Times. It’s a brilliantly focused on what employers need to do in order to increase employee engagement. The main take away: It's not the jobs. It's how we measure success that is killing enthusiasm.

 

This side of the equation—how employers need to change—has been researched and written about ad nauseam for decades. In fact, as the article pointed out, Gallup has consistently found that 90% of workers are either not engaged, or actively disengaged. Only 10% are actively engaged.

 

That’s crazy! And—an awesome opportunity for the few who are ready to step up and share their passion, even if it means breaking a few rules along the way.  

 

Yes, most companies are structured primarily to serve their own bottom line. They pay lip serve to customer service, but forget that their employees are the ones who serve their customers.  Some even talk about human capital, but then forget to invest.

 

Here’s the point: don’t waste your time waiting for companies to get it right. Instead, get in there, break some rules, and focus on finding better ways to serve the customers (and your team).

 

Don’t wait for your boss, or even a mentor, to see your talents and offer you promotions. Instead, start looking for problems, and implementing solutions, especially if it’s “Not your job.”

 

You don’t need to find a perfect company, or even the perfect team to do your best work. What you need is to decide what’s important to you, and go do it.

 

Here’s To Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

A year ago, I went from having a mean doggy paddle to learning how to swim in fifteen weeks. Hip pain drove me to sign up for Swim Across America (SAA), and the excitement of my progress lead me to do the 3-mile open-water swim last September.

 

Once the challenge was complete, I was happy to be done with the training, and ready to simply enjoy swimming. I wanted to get better, but I didn’t want to go through any more discomfort in the pool.

 

Problem was: my shoulders hurt constantly, and I was struggling to breathe most of the time. Said simply, I wasn’t a very efficient swimmer.

 

Sound familiar?

 

“I want to get a promotion, new opportunities, to improve the quality of our products, but…”

 

Of course, there are many “buts,” regardless of an underlying desire to improve. So, how do you overcome stagnation on your team, and in your career?

 

Throughout the podcast, I share the top three strategies that work.

 

Here they are (though they’re better in context, so listen in!):

 

1. Identify your results.
3. Get an outsider’s perspective.

 

Oh, here’s a bonus tip, offered by Brooke, my 11-year-old niece, in a previous post: Patience and persistence will get you to your results. Stay with it, even though it’s hard—doing so is scientifically proven to increase your self-esteem.

 

Where have you become stagnant in your career/life? What new results do you care enough about to push you out of your comfort zone and into the results you crave?

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

Have you ever wondered how some people rise quickly, within their career, organization, or industry?

 

Throughout this interview, Dan shares brilliant ideas and strategies for increasing your credibly, and attracting the exact opportunities you want.

 

In his mid-70’s, Dan is still pushing himself to get outside his comfort zone, have new experiences, meet new people, and most importantly, share what he’s learning along the way.

 

One of the stories he shares is about how he took a potentially deadly disease and made it into a profitable venture. His outlook on life is remarkable!

 

He is the author of more than 130 books, has been a publisher since 1969, and is a Certified Speaking Professional (CSP).

 

He is an evangelist for books, an ombudsman for authors, an advocate for publishers, and the godfather to thousands of successfully-published books.

 

Some of his books are Writing Nonfiction, The Self-Publishing Manual, The Skydiver's Handbook, The Expert Witness Handbook and The Older Cat.

 

His seminars have been featured on CNN, his books have been pictured in The Wall Street Journal and his story has been told in The New York Times. The media come to Dan because he is the leading authority on book publishing.

 

His 26-year-old newsletter, Publishing Poynters has a circulation of more than 21,000. Get accesshere.

 

To learn more about Dan, visitPara Publishing.

 

To get free information on writing, producing, and promoting,go here.

 

Thank you, Dan, for sharing your Greatness!

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

 

Walking through the double doors to the outdoor pool at Meadowbrook in Baltimore, I remember thinking, “Wow, that’s incredible,” as I watched a woman effortlessly swim laps in a 50-meter lane.

 

At the time, I barely knew how to put on a swim cap, and desperately wanted to be able to swim 25 meters without having to stop constantly to breathe. “There’s no way I could swim 50 meters,” I thought, as I watched her flip and kick off the wall. 

 

Rather than concern myself with being able to swim 50 meters, I refocused on strengthening the skills I needed to finish 25 meters without stopping.

 

It wasn’t pretty, but a couple of weeks later, I completed 25 meters without stopping. “Do it again,” Marci, my coach insisted, while I pleaded for just 30 more seconds of rest. “3-2-1… Go,” she insisted.

 

And I went—and I went—and I went, each time decreasing my rest, increasing my distance, or both.

 

Just eight weeks later, I found myself gasping for air as I completed my first 50-meter swim. It was, again, not pretty.

 

Visions of drowning made it impossible to focus, and I wound up doing a mixed-up version of the doggie paddle and breast stroke as I heard Marci’s voice, “You got this, Misti, keep it going.”

 

In that moment, I figured she must have known something I didn’t, so I claimed her belief in me as my own. Aching to improve, I did every assignment she gave me.

 

A couple of weeks later, I found myself back in the 50-meter lane with Marci barking orders and giving instructions to improve my stroke. I was (and still am) far from looking (or feeling) effortless in the water, but I did just complete a 4,800-meter swim as part of my training for the 5-mile open water swim for Swim Across America.

 

Last year, I went for 3&3. I raised $3K and swam 3 miles. Completing that challenge inspired me to go for 5&5 this year.

 

In fact, looking back, completing that first 25 meters without stopping to breathe inspired me to go for 50 meters, which inspired me to go 50 meters without stopping, and so on.

 

A year ago, I didn’t think I would ever be able to swim 50 meters without stopping. Today, I have no idea if I’ll be able to complete the 5-mile open water swim on September 20th within the time limit, but I’m starting to believe that anything is possible.

 

As I reflect on this journey, I’ve come to discover a few of the key components to achievement:

 

1.      You don’t have to be inspired to start, but you have to start to be inspired. The only reason I decided to learn how to swim was because a good friend suggested it might help my hip pain. The rest came later.

2.      Set small goals, reach them, and then decide what you’re inspired to do next. A good friend of mine recently launched an awesome online summit, where he shared dozens of interviews with highly successful experts. A week or so post-launch, he was beating himself up for only selling X amount of recordings. “I planned to sell X (very big number) of recordings and increase my list by X (another very big number),” he said. As a result, he could not appreciate his accomplishment. Set yourself up for success—and joy—by setting a goal that will stretch but not break you.

3.      Allow yourself to be pulled by what inspires you, rather than pushed by your fear. Just as marketers use fear to motivate purchases (don’t get fat, buy these rice crackers), we naturally use fear to drive us to get stuff done. While I’m not suggesting that fear is a bad motivator, I am saying that inspiration is far more joyful. It’s fun to make progress toward the goals that inspire you.

4.      Find a coach/mentor. There is no way I could have completed even 25 meters without Marci, much less 5 miles. We all need someone to help create a plan, work out the kinks, and cheer us on. Recently, I hired a coach to help me create a plan for improving my speaking skills for this same reason. If you care deeply about improving, find someone who can help you see what you cannot.

5.      Keep going, even if you can’t see. On the swim portion of the Iron Girl (my first triathlon) in Columbia, Maryland, the sun was low on the horizon, right in our eyes, making it impossible to see where we were going, or when to turn. It was frustrating, and I found myself with plenty of excuses to stop. That’s when I heard myself say, “You don’t have to see to keep moving forward.” It became the mantra that got me through that swim. Since then, I’ve realized it’s applicable to nearly every area of our lives. Too often, we get caught up in needing all the instructions—the map, as Seth Godin often says—before we venture forth.

 

Big achievements start with small feats. As Zig Ziglar used to say, “You can eat an elephant, one bite at a time.”

 

Don’t wait to be inspired to challenge yourself. Go out and challenge yourself, and watch as you become inspired. Where will you end up after a few bites?

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

Nobody reaches greatness by himself or herself, and nothing great is ever achieved in isolation. If we want to go for greatness, we must ask for the support we need.

 

The best leaders on the planet understand that they need their team to reach their goals, and so they ask for help and provide the opportunity for others to step up.

 

Until this afternoon, I thought I was pretty good at asking for help.

 

“You’ve done a great job asking for donations for Swim Across America,” Jane, my coach, said to me, “But have you asked your fans to help you get the word out about your new speech?”

 

She nailed me when she followed that up with, “It’s easier to make the ask when the outcome doesn’t directly benefit you.” Of course, this provided some great fodder for journaling and self-reflection this evening.

 

Considering how much I coach others to ask for help, it’s my turn to step up and ask for your help.

 

My newest keynote speech, Provoke Ability: How to skillfully leverage the talent on your team, has gotten some great reviews.

 

I would like to talk to other leaders/executives – if you know anyone who could benefit from hearing this message, please have them email me directly at: mb@measurablegreatness.com

 

Thank you!

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

P.S. Yes, it made me uncomfortable to ask for your help, but I suppose this type of discomfort is where greatness lies. 

Can you imagine being fired for initiative? Better yet, can you imagine firing an employee who consistently went above and beyond to serve your customer and reach your team goals?

 

Of course not!

 

Yet, this happens every day. And, it happened to Stacy. Not once, but 16 times in one summer. Remarkably, she now serves as an advisor to many of the very same companies who let her go in her early 20’s.

 

Stacy Allegro is one of the most authentic people you’ll ever meet. She is passionately dedicated to helping service-based businesses dominate their market by helping teams create extraordinary guest experiences, and connect on the deepest possible level to achieve crazy customer loyalty.

 

Stacy is remarkable, and you will appreciate the stories she shared throughout this interview. From being labeled ADD at age four (back when ADD wasn’t discussed), to her experience in residential drug rehab as a teenager, to—now— teaching companies how to connect to the human spirit.

 

Throughout this interview, Stacy goes into great detail about what it means to go Beyond and Beyond, both as a team and an individual contributor.

 

Having experienced many leaders who failed to draw out talent, Stacy offers 5 practical steps to nurture and provoke greatness that are powerful and simple.

 

They are:

 

1.     Get to know you team. Go beyond the template interview questions and get to know what drives their deepest desires and passions.

2.     Evaluate their skillset. If they were good enough to get through your door but not exactly a fit for the position being offered, consider other positions that might be a perfect fit. Never let talent walk out the door.

3.     Assign mentors. For new hires, and anyone stepping into a new position, consider providing a mentor to help shorten the learning curve and to provide support.  

4.     Help them create a clear path for success. Reaching new levels of success in one’s career is inspiring and energizing. Make sure every member of your team understands what success looks like.

5.     Provide feedback early and often. Don’t wait for the annual review—provide feedback on what’s going well, and what needs improvement early and often.

 

Thank you, Stacy, for sharing your brilliance—and a bit of your life story—with my community!

 

To get more ideas and strategies for achieving excellence in customer service,click here, and sign up for Stacy’s newsletter today!

 

Here’s To Your Greatness,

 

 

Misti Burmeister

Leaders want to be effective, and employees want to succeed, so why what gets in the way? Why do challenges like generational differences (and other differences) impede performance, wreck havoc on innovation, and cause unnecessary revenue loss?

 

Better yet, what are the most effective leaders and companies doing to increase passion, performance, innovation, and collaboration?

 

Throughout this interview, I share strategic shifts leaders can make to increase:

 

·         Productivity

·         Communication

·         Collaboration

·         Retention

·         Personal Ownership, or responsibility

·         And so much more…

 

Listen in.

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

Misti Burmeister

 

 

P.S. Get your 3 Practical Strategies for Building a Motivated Team – Today – click here, put your email in the bottom right corner, and push the Download Now button. 

A couple of weeks ago, I had the chance to spend a whole week with my 11-year-old niece, Brooke.

 

The day after she flew in from Colorado, we headed over to my gym here in Baltimore. It’s a Crossfit gym, so there’s lots of open area and rings that hang from the celling for things like “muscle up’s.”

 

With a gymnastics background, Brooke had a whole new appreciation for these rings. My jaw dropped as she put one foot in each ring, and then dropped into a split. Actually, I cringed, though she wasn’t fazed in the least.

 

As a result of pain in my lower back, my physical therapist had instructed me to stretch out the muscles on the inside of my legs.

 

As I was stretching, Brooke came over and asked, “Auntie, are you trying to get the splits?”

 

“That would be awesome, but no—just trying to stretch out these muscles.”

 

“Would you like some help with your flexibility there?”

 

Of course I wanted to learn from her, so I jumped up and asked what she had in mind.

 

She grabbed two boxes and put them across from each other. “Okay, auntie,” she demonstrated, “put one foot on the box. Do you feel that stretch?”

 

“Yep!”

 

“Okay, now drop,” she said as she dropped down into a full split.

 

“Seriously? That’s not in my cards for today, Brooke. “

 

“Come on. Drop down a little,” she insisted, and so I did.

 

“A little more. Come on, Auntie.”

 

Before I knew it, I was stuck! That’s what happens when you try to impress an 11-year-old gymnast with your flexibility.

 

Tilting backward, I managed to fall out of that mess, with the tiniest, “OUCH!”

 

Flustered, I said, “Brooke, you make that look so easy. It’s not that easy.”

 

“Auntie,” she commanded my attention, “I have been working at this every day since I was four! It’s going to take you some time and practice to get there!”

 

There is nothing like getting a lesson on patience and persistence from your 11-year-old niece, but man is she right.

 

If you’re anything like me, and don’t particularly love being new at something, consider Brooke’s sage advice and be patient with yourself as you persistently work to improve.

 

I used her philosophy in swimming this week, as I just learned a more efficient—but radically different—kick. It’s hard and frustrating, but I keep hearing Brooke’s voice and remembering her lesson.

 

What are you learning right now?

 

Here’s to Your Greatness,

 

 

Misti Burmeister